#im sure this new form will have bad consequences later

[mettywiththenotes]

Thinking about them in episode 2

Light and dark capes, walking through the undercity alone (especially after just losing people they cared about: Silco and Sky), finding someone who needs help, helping (any future consequences this will have aside for now) and then sitting with them (gaining a follower)

[aneenasevla]

Red Velvet - Chapter 7

MasterList / Akane’s profile / Last chapter here

Chapter 7 - First Snow

Himuro has never felt so at peace as he did in these last  two months.

To begin with, he had won a match within the Kengan Association, securing yet another new property for his boss to further expand Ginokuniya Bookstore's business and, as a bonus, he had received a large commission to put him at ease regarding financial matters for the next few months.

Afterwards, he got a little closer to one of Tomori's friends who had become interested in him and asked for his contact information. Her name was Mariko, and she had a very refined taste for drinks and cocktails, so they were getting along quite well. A friendship with benefits to keep him warm in those cold days.

And finally: it had been two months since Rihito had stopped bothering him with his constant whining and requests for alms in the form of girls' phone numbers. The truth was that Rihito no longer complained about his lack of luck with women, because through some miraculous intervention from some merciful god, he had become able to attract them on his own.

May God, the devil or whatever bless Agata Akane, because she deserved it. 

His phone buzzes, and a text appeared in his friend's group chat:

Dickhead_Tokita:

Kanami invited you guys for a hotpot here at our house on christmas eve 

we’ll have karaoke and dancing games, according to her

come if you want

EggHead:

If it has karaoke and just dance, tomori is already in for sure, and so am I LOL

Himuro smiles at this, setting the dishes aside and drying his hands on the tea towel so he can type.

Gigolo_Master:

I’m in!

is it okay if I bring a friend?

miss kanami knows her as far as I know

it’s one of the girls tomori introduced me to 

GiantKiller:

I’m going to spend Christmas with my family this year, guys, sorry 😔

But even if I went to this hotpot, I would be just third wheeling

EggHead:

c’mon, man, hiro and mr. paikon are single too, they’ll probably also go

and koga and ryuki, and kazzy… 

GiantKiller:

True, but I still can’t go. My bad

Dickhead_Tokita:

no, the two kids and yamashitakazuo also have plans

kaede went on vacation

it’s just us

Gigolo_Master:

lets fill that house up then

I’ll bring my friend

we need more women for that party lol

and don’t worry kaneda

will you also spend new years with them?

GiantKiller:

I can spend it with you guys if they don’t force me to stay with them 😆

Gigolo_Master:

try to show up, we’ll spend new years eve getting shitfaced lmao

I finally got a day off on the 31st guys

the first in two years, holy shit

we can’t miss this opportunity

EggHead:

well, if we do that on a safe place, I’m in

Dickhead_Tokita:

the message is given anyway 

we can inform ichiro later 

Gigolo_Master:

I haven't heard a peep from him since afternoon

he must be out on the razzle somewhere

or getting busy with miss agata 😏

EggHead:

Oh damn xD

ATTA BOY 

Chu-cha-cha-chu-chu-cha 🎶

GiantKiller:

You really liked this brazilian funk thing, uh 

Gigolo_Master:

LMAO

I swear to you guys

you have no idea how PEACEFUL my life has been in the last two months

first okubo got a girlfriend and stopped being a pain in my ass

and now rihito finally got a fuckin grip and learned the bennefits of kissing and not telling

or fucking and not telling in this case LOL

and consequently he stopped bothering me too

I’m living the fuckin dream

Dickhead_Tokita:

that’s what I call a christmas miracle

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

nope, you learning how to get outta the convo without kicking yourself outta the chat is what I call a miracle

dumbass

and good evening guys

Gigolo_Master:

speaking of the devil

there he is

good evening loverboy

Dickhead_Tokita:

hey there is an invitation up there in the chat

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

I saw it and I’m also im!

especially since we'll be eating auntie's food

hell yeah 😎

hey can I bring someone too?

EggHead:

I already know who it is

Dickhead_Tokita:

Kanami said she knows the organ thief, and she does not steal organs 😎

so its fine

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

my guy, she steals other things

not organs, but sometimes what comes out of them LMAO

but yeah, its her

she's already an old friend of the bakery staff, so I think it'll be alright

Dickhead_Tokita:

so she steals blood then?

I do that too, but with my fists 😎

GiantKiller:

Seriously, guys, quit with these jokes Ohma never gets 🙄🙄🙄

Dickhead_Tokita:

I actually got it, kaneda

you are the ones who did not get mine 😎

Gigolo_Master:

and seriously kaneda

you're asking rihito to stop being an idiot, basically

its like asking water to stop being wet 

just give up

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

🖕

EggHead:

man I don't know if ohma is dumb or if he just pretends to be

Dickhead_Tokita:

you will never know 😎

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

anyway

I'm too busy to try to understand what's going on inside tokita's head

but I'll go to the hotpot, it'll be dope

Dickhead_Tokita:

alright, I will tell kana

she told you guys to bring drinks, minus okubo, who will come with tomori

he can bring some soda

EggHead:

fine be me 

but the party is in two weeks, isn’t it?

miss kanami really likes to give invitations in advance, doesn't she?

GiantKiller:

Well, she’s a business owner 

She needs to be organized 

And early invitations help us to prepare accordingly 

It helps you guys, in that case

Dickhead_Tokita:

well, now the message is definitely given

Gigolo_Master:

drinks are kinda my thing, so we're covered

I'll tell my friend to bring some too

speaking of which, mr. ohya gave me a nice gift

do you remember that pricey sake called Kotozakura?

he gave me a full bottle!

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

damn himuro

that’s what we’re talking about!

this is getting better and better!

EggHead:

HELL YEAH!

Dickhead_Tokita:

if you start to drink too much and do some stupid shit, I will kick you guys out

kanami said that

Gigolo_Master:

relax, we’ll behave

you heard that, rihito?

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

for fuck’s sake

I didn’t do anything!

I’m just chilling! 

Dickhead_Tokita:

said the guy who got arrested about 4 times for doing dumb shit after drinking

And you say I’m the dumb one

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

shut up, I’m not the only one!

okubo also got arrested with me

but you fuckers always forget about that

you guys are obsessed with me, I swear

do want me to fuck you too or something?

Dickhead_Tokita:

what, are you mimicking your friend now?

are you also a cannibal? 😎

EggHead:

damn, I went to drink some water and came back only to be accused of past shit

CANNIBAL LMAO

first an organ trafficker and now a cannibal, this shit only gets better LOL

Dickhead_Tokita:

If you bring her, you will be the dish, not us 😎

EggHead:

fuck, and that makes so much sense

he called her a "sword swallower"

that's why he's so quiet now LMAOOOOO

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

you guys can go suck a bag of dicks

fucking assholes

anyway, I’m kinda busy here

I’ll take to y’all later 

Gigolo_Master:

too busy fucking and not telling?

Dickhead_Tokita:

(answering to @Mr_Iron_Fingers) Nah, I like mangoes better 😎

Gigolo_Master:

DAMN OHMA

what’s happening to you

you’re scaring the hell outta me

Dickhead_Tokita:

???????

Why?

EggHead:

since when do you make this kind of joke? o.O

Dickhead_Tokita:

I learned from you guys ��

I’m not deaf, and I’m a quick learner 

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

Hell yeah bro!

you’re finally learning from the master, eh, seaweed head

I’m so proud!

you’re going places!

Gigolo_Master:

weren’t you busy?

Christmas came early?

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

Fuck you!

it’s ‘cause you guys won’t shut up!

Dickhead_Tokita:

what a short attention span 😎 

GiantKiller:

I think I finally got it, Himuro

Ohma uses the smiling face with sunglasses emoji to make it clear that he’s joking

Dickhead_Tokita:

yes, and I’m doing it right now

koga says it helps making things clear

if I don’t use it, everyone thinks that I believe all the shit you guys say

kaneda almost started crying last time

and koga thought we were going to spar in the middle of the night 

he waited about 30 minutes for me and almost froze from the cold

GiantKiller:

Oh, poor kid 🤣🤣

He’s okay, right?

And thanks for your concern, Ohma

I can tell when these three are joking, but you almost never change your tone when in or out of the chat

I really thought you went to call the Kure that time 😭

Dickhead_Tokita:

he survived 😎

and just remember that I would have to pay an arm and a leg

the kure would never work for me for free, and I don't want it either

raian is my friend, but I don't want anymore favors from the Devil 

he's more of a cannibal than ichiro's girl 😎

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

RIHITO

GODDAMMIT DUDE

how many times do I have to tell ya???

and she isn’t my girl

she’s just a friend that I fuck occasionally 

Dickhead_Tokita:

change my nickname and I will think about using yours

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

for fuck’s sake

(@Mr_Iron_Fingers changed @Dickhead_Tokita’s nickname to @Kelpthullu)

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

there

happy now?

Kelpthullu:

my name isn’t Kelpthullu, dumbass

fuck it, now you’re Ichiro forevermore 😎

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

DUDE FUCK YOU

Kelpthullu:

go cry about it on Cannibal’s shoulders 😎

Gigolo_Master:

holy shit rihito

even ohma is making fun of you

you’re out of your game lol

Kelpthullu:

I'm also inspired today so don't get used to it 😆

this must be the afterglow you guys talk about so much

Gigolo_Master:

LMAOOO

seriously, guys, I’ll be off now

my shift is almost over and I have to catch the train home

I’ll talk to you later

Kelpthullu:

I’ll be off too, I was going to just send the invitations but got carried away

later

And the chat went silent after that.

Himuro puts his phone in his pants pocket, still laughing to himself. Adding Ohma to that group chat had been the most genius idea they had come up with. Now only quality jokes came out of there.

He finishes stacking the glasses and heads out to clock out; he couldn't wait to get home and take a hot bath. It was freezing cold now. Soon the first snow would fall. It would be the perfect time to stay under the blankets with someone...

…

And at another establishment, on the other side of town, another member of that group chat was enjoying the evening in the exact same way.

"Rihito, are you okay? You're looking at your phone like you want to punch it..."

Rihito starts a little, turning his head to look over his shoulder. He was sitting on the edge of the huge bed, in one of the several rooms in the luxurious Gold Pleasure Club building, in the company of two beautiful employees who were willing to warm him up on that cold night, the three of them resting from the night's activities. He smiles awkwardly, trying to contain his anger.

"Oh, it’s okay, girls, relax. It's just my friends talking shit in our chat group, as always. I'm turning off notifications."

"Anything interesting there?," One of the girls, a curvy blonde, bites her lip. The other one, who talked first, had dark skin and curly hair.

"Nothing as interesting as you!," He lies down again, and they both laugh when he hugs them, bringing them close to his huge chest. And he does it without grabing them too enthusiastically, which was a very welcome development "I was feeling so lonely today... you guys just made my night better."

"Yes, you've been coming here alone these last few months. So Okubo really got a girlfriend?," the dark-skinned one asks.

"Yep! And now he's out there, too busy being all cute and disgusting with her," He pretends to sniff, his tone playfull "He's too good for his brothel bro now..."

"That's so mean," the blonde pouts, "Leaving his friend behind like that..."

"Well, at least we still have this hottie here to keep us company," the dark-skinned one puts a leg over his hips, smiling "But man... is it just me or you got sexier?"

"Yeah, you made me shiver all over," the blonde laughs "Even more so when you asked me to sit on you."

"C'mon, I pale in comparison to you," He laughs slyly "And I really developed a taste for that, I won't deny it. What can I say? I see these smooth, soft skins and I already want to kiss them all over...," He pretends to try to bite the dark-skinned one, who makes a sound that was half a scream, half a high-pitched laugh, playfully pushing him away.

"Oh, okay, that's enough," she gets up "Let us clean up, you animal. Come on, Naoko," she calls for the other one.

"We'll be right back," she kisses his neck before getting up.

"Alright. I'm just going to stay here and laze away...," He smiles as he stretches, dropping back onto the bed with a satisfied sigh. Wow, what a great way to end that night! Good booze, some snacks, two beautiful girls on each arm... was there a better way to live life?

"It's just a shame Akane is so busy with that evil lair she calls a hair salon..."

The thought makes him open his eyes. Akane and he had gone out together a few more times in the last two months, to eat or to dance, and they always ended the night at some small love hotel or at her apartment, if they were close enough to it. He honestly preferred the apartment; he had developed a taste for colorful walls and tacky decor, especially the hot pink monster that was the couch. Just as he had enjoyed Akane's company too. So much so that he even missed it. She was busy during the end of the year, with women appearing one after the other in the salon, wanting to get all dolled-up for the holidays in an attempt to impress uninterested husbands. So he had to seek company at the Gold Pleasure Group, which always ended up emptying his wallet. He couldn't wait for the year-end bonuses... 

He hears a very low buzz and some giggling in the bathroom of the suite, but what caught his attention the most was hearing his name.

He raises his head immediately. Oh, were they talking about him? A mixture of strong curiosity and fear took hold of him. Were they arguing about his performance? Those giggles were worrying... unable to resist, he got up from the bed and went to the bathroom door, as silently as he could, putting his ear close to the door to hear better. 

"... when he got closer I thought he was going to grab me, but then he brought me closer slowly, and gave me a sniff on the neck… wow, I got goosebumps…," he heard the blonde say.

"I saw it... but I was too busy feeling him inside me... where did he learn to do that?"

"Girl, I wouldn’t mind if he comes after me again, I swear to you…"

"I know! He’s much better than before. What happened to him?"

"I don’t know, but it was good… a winter miracle, I’m actually cumming for the first time in months…"

They begin to laugh coquettishly.

"Stop, that sounds so wrong…"

"Am I lying?"

"I was luckier than you then… but it’s true, he’s really getting better."

Rihito had to make an absurd effort not to run to the window, throw his fists in the air and scream in triumph for the entire fucking district to hear.

Damn, he had done it! Two girls loved his performance, and not out of pure pretense so as not to hurt his ego! He had truly learned how to be a good lover!

“And it was all thanks to her!”

And again, thinking about Akane brings that warm joy deep in his chest. Damn, he was going to make that woman moan and scream so much the next time they met! She deserved all that and more.

"Oh... damn," he heard the dark-skinned one say.

"What is it?"

"Our time is running out... shit, I wanted him to give me head too."

"We can ask him later, outside…"

"For free? No, he'll get used to it."

"Yeah…," she sighs "It’s a shame… but we’ll offer our services if he comes later, okay?"

"Hell no, I want him for myself."

They both laugh louder.

"Okay, let's go, we have to tell him anyway...," he hears footsteps.

He starts for a second, running away from the door and lying back down on the bed, trying to strike a relaxed pose on the sheets, with his arms behind his head and one leg casually bent up. That's it, a badass pose, he had to keep good impressions with the girls...

They look at him, picking up their dresses from the floor while smiling at him.

"Sorry, Rihito, we have to go."

"Yeah, time's up…," the dark-skinned one says in a sad tone, which he learned was genuine.

"So… are you going to come visit us again?," the blonde smiles.

"Oh, it’s a shame, I was loving the company," He smiles at them, "And I intend to, when my wallet is a little fuller again, hahaha! But it was really worth it. You two are wonderful," He coos, in a deliberately sugary tone to make them laugh.

And they really laugh, one of them waving her hand shyly. They quickly put on their clothes and leave.

"Oh, you still have another half hour, so just relax," the dark-skinned one says "You already know how it works."

"I know! I'm going to stretch here a bit. Good night," He blows kisses to them, and they laugh again as they close the door. He takes another deep breath, stretching and hugging a pillow.

That bed was really huge, warm and comfortable. But strangely, he missed something. Preferably something a lot more... fuzzy.

He opens his eyes again. And here come those strange thoughts... it was probably because she had been mentioned in the group chat, when he had received carte blanche to take her to Kanami's house, at the upcoming Christmas party that their friends would throw.

He frowns. Would inviting her be too weird? They weren't dating or anything, just having fun together every now and then... but damn, they were friends now, weren't they? What harm would it do to want to have some fun with a friend, especially among so many others? He finally makes up his mind, grabbing his phone from the dresser next to the bed and searching for a specific chat.

Himbo_King🦍:

hey miss lumberjack

are you busy? lol

She takes a few minutes to respond.

Boss_Bitch🍑:

hey he-man ❤️

I’m home now

Himbo_King🦍:

I have an invitation for u

do you have any plans for christmas eve?

Boss_Bitch🍑:

I’ll be busy during the day

those hags love to show up at the salon on short notice

but I’ll be free after 5 o’clock

we’ll have the next day all for ourselves ❤️

why?

Himbo_King🦍:

great, it's a nighttime event anyway

our friends are planning a hotpot for christmas eve

at miss kanami’s house

you’re invited

we’ll bring booze and ours empty stomachs lmao

Boss_Bitch🍑:

wow, really?!

Butch’s gonna throw a party?? And she’ll cook???

she never baked me a loaf of bread without charging me for it!

damn what a Golden boy doesn’t do to a bitch’s humor LMAO

A fuckin christmas miracle indeed 

I’m in! Christmas Eve, right? 

Himbo_King🦍:

yeah, but quit with the Golden boy shit lmao

that sounds so fucking gay

I’m a Fuck-Buddy with a capital F 😎

and anyway, her boyfriend eats like he’s about to starve

he must have convinced her lol

Boss_Bitch🍑:

I’m talking about HER Golden boy, dumbass LMAO

and yeah, that must’ve been it

Butch’s the kind of girl who grabs men by their stomachs 

and you’re a Golden Retriever, yea, but far from a Golden boy, get a fuckin grip LOL

Himbo_King🦍:

ooh, got it

but he isn’t golden either

he’s a cosmic horror creature coming straight from the depths 🐙

then he found his own Amazon

you’ll met him at the party

Boss_Bitch🍑:

well fuck

I’m curious now, he doesn’t seem bad…

is he such a pain in the ass?

anyway, forget about it

I got worried that Butch was with some good-for-nothing pos, but I remembered that she would’ve kicked him to the curb if he was that bad

that woman is terrifying 

Himbo_King🦍:

believe me, I know that lol

and don’t worry, he’s nice

he’s one of my bros

he’s just dumb as a roch

*robs

*ROCK

DAMMIT

Boss_Bitch🍑:

LMAO I got it

anyway… are you coming or will you stay there, scratching your balls?

or did you already have fun and just wanna chat?

I guess it’s the third option, you usually show up earlier than that

Himbo_King🦍:

hey, is this an invitation?

I can crash at your place, no problem at all

I prefer your nails to scratch my balls anyway LMAO

and sorry, you were busy at the salon today

I thought I would be a bother if I showed up

Boss_Bitch🍑:

well, if you went straight to the salon you wouldn’t come out alive LOL

but you’re welcome at my place

speaking of which, I still haven’t crashed at yours

do you have a roommate? 

since you do not bring any girls there lol

Himbo_King🦍:

I was talking about waiting for you at your doorstep, dummy

I won’t steep a foot in that chicken house you call a salon ever again LOL

I thought you were too tired to do anything, but if not, I’m coming

and yeah, you still haven’t see my place

I also live alone

Boss_Bitch🍑: 

A massage from your fingers would be really nice, not gonna lie

and well, I’d like to come to your place, but you can come to mine today

and since you must’ve already fucked some bitch today, I'm going to prepare a bath 

I won't kiss a mouth that tastes like other chick's pussy LOL

Himbo_King🦍:

dude fuck you LMAO

alright I'll tidy up before I go

gotta rinse my mouth to meet Her Highness' demands lol

I’ll be there in 20m

man its so fucking cold!

a hot bath would be really nice, specially with good company 👅 

Boss_Bitch🍑:

exactly

you really think that I’ll waste water just to wash your stinky ass?

you must want some glitter-filled bath bombs too, oh my

maybe for me cause this bitch here likes to smell good, but you?

only if its like when we're on my couch

you on top of it and me on top of you 🍑🍆

Himbo_King🦍:

have some shame, you demon LMAO

I’ll give you some real bombs after the bath, not before

right on top of your pink-pornstar monster 

no, seriously, I’m coming

want me to bring something?

chocolate, some beers idk

Boss_Bitch🍑:

dunno, bring some noodles or anything we can microwave

and yeah, beer and chocolate sounds good too

oh yeah I almost forgot

bring your sausage and two eggs causa I’m starving LMAO

I mean, if there’s anything left for me 😗😗

if not, we can do netflix without chill LOL

Himbo_King🦍:

fucking hell woman LMAO

you wanna make me run like the fuckin wind or something??

I need to be careful, I don’t wanna get run over lol

but alright then, beer, chocolate, instant noodles, my sausage and two eggs

that’s my grocery list

be there soon 

Boss_Bitch🍑: 

man take your mind outta the gutter 

I just want a sandwich 😇😇 

Himbo_King🦍:

yeah, sure you do

a sausage and eggs sandwich

whatever, I’ll bring everything

kiss on ya tits 🍒

He then leaves his phone aside, going to the bathroom to take a quick shower, just so he doesn't show up in her apartment smelling like perfume from two different women. They weren't dating, but it was all about respect and consideration.

About ten minutes later, he had already paid for his stay, gone to a convenience store nearby and bought everything she asked for. He had even bought more than one chocolate bar, because in that cold weather, a sweet treat sounded really good. He walks through the busy streets of the outskirts, the extremities of his body slowly becoming numb from the cold. Holy shit, it seemed like winter was getting more intense with each passing year, and it wasn’t even snowing yet! He lets out a shaky breath, the air leaving his mouth and condensing into smoke, hanging in the air. He then makes up his mind, taking out his phone and sending a private text to Okubo.

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

seriously, man

let’s bring some quality booze for the hotpot

if it’s cold af now, just imagine how much worse it’ll get til christmas

Okubo answers pretty quickly; he must’ve already been on his phone.

EggHead:

I’m counting on that bro

I’m shivering all over and I’m not even outside wtf

I’m on my car, with the heater turned on and everything

wyd man?

your space heater broke or something? lol

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

I’m leaving the golden pleasure club  now

all alone in a cold winter night, all because my brothel bro found a bedmate to keep him warm

I’m going to akane’s house

EggHead:

lol you’re one to talk

you have a bedmate too, she’s just not your gf

anyway, I have to go now, I’m kinda in a hurry

I have to get there in time before the First Snow falls 🥰

Rihito frowns, the sight of that emoji sending shivers down his spine.

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

First Snow?

and what the hell is up with that emoji??

dude, are you gay? 🤨

EggHead:

I should ask you the same lmao

you never heard about the First Snow thing? I read about it recently 

it’s a thing about couples watching the first snowfall of the year

it’s said that, if a couple watch it together, their relationship will last forever

it’s the kind of cute, cheesy thing tomori likes 

will I get something good in return? For sure

so I’m in 😁

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

… Okubo Naoya

my man

my guy 

my chummy chum

that was the gayest shit you've ever said on this chat

fuck that first snow crap

why are you making excuses to get laid? Just get under your sheets with her and that’s it

you can watch that first snow from the window while you’re pounding her

EggHead:

says the guy who twerks like a bitch LMAO

and my girl like this stuff, man

if that makes her all wet for me, so be it LOL

and besides, it’s fun!

getting under the sheets with a hot cocoa mug and my chick to keep me warm sounds fuckin awesome, 10/10

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

LMAO you fucker

I knew it, you’re a pervert just like me afterall

but whatever, do what you want

I don’t need all that to get laid, I’m a very simple man

and I only twerk if I know that’ll get someone twerking for me in return

EggHead:

see?

it’s the same principle, dumbass

my girl only asks for a bit of snow

yours asks for you fucking dignity LOL

Mr_Iron_Fingers:

what dignity LMAO

I have way more dignity than a mf who’s gonna watch some stupid snowflakes fall

drinking hot cocoa and eating some sissy cookies

while he waits for his missus to get in the mood

but again, do what you must to get a good fuck, that’s not my problem

have fun

and tell tomori that akane will be at the hotpot

EggHead:

hell yeah!

alright, go twerk and have some fun yourself

send my regards to your Cannibal LOL

And his icon goes offline. He must already be on the road.

Rihito thinks about calling Okubo every name under the sun, but it wouldn't be funny since he wouldn't see those messages until the next day, after spending the night fucking his girlfriend to the sound of crackling fireplaces and snow piling up on the windowsill. And like the helpless romantic that he was, he would be too happy to care about some dumb insults. It wasn't even worth wasting time.

He huffs and puts away his phone, picking up the bags with his purchases and walking faster, eager to get away from the cold. He didn't need all that cheesy bullshit. He had found a friend who disliked them as much as he did. And they were both going to enjoy that cold as it deserved to be enjoyed, yes sir.

The relief is great when he finally sees the dirty block where Akane lived. The good thing about that freezing cold was that the smell of garbage and cat piss was much less pronounced.

He goes up the stairs; the place was strangely quiet for such a neighborhood. Normally he would hear some ear-splitting music from some apartment, or some crazy couple in the middle of a screaming match or even cats fighting or mating on the roof. But the night was completely silent. Which was actually good, at least the walls were thick.

He knocked on the door and a moment later she opened it. She smiled and opened it completely when she saw who it was. She was in her homely clothes, with her glasses and a loose shirt, and barefoot.

"Hi," she lets him in and closes the door, giving him space and grabbing the bags he was giving her "Get in the bathroom, I'll put the groceries away and I'll be right there." 

"'Night!," He greets her with a smile, his face red from the cold, but it didn't seem to have affected his mood at all "Sorry for coming this late. If I had known that you'd be free after work, I would've come straight from work," And after taking off his shoes, he heads towards the bathroom, without thinking to much. He had been visiting that apartment for two months now. They were already past the formalities.

"Sorry, I also thought you were busy. I remember once you were working late on a last minute delivery, and the next day you had a match scheduled," She says while putting things away.

"See? It’s not just you who’s racing against the clock because of a job," He comments, raising his voice as he opens the door to the bathroom, already taking off his clothes and folding them over the basket next to the sink "Year's end has been pretty busy, but after the holidays we'll be able to make the most of it..."

Rihito had seen that bathroom before: it was tiny, but organized and very clean, and of course, a bit cluttered, with colorful things on the shelves, some motivational pictures (his favorite was the one were it was written “one shit a day make your problems flush away”) and some little decorative plants. It still was way less eye-catching than the rest of the house (no piece of furniture had surpassed the vintage-porn couch yet), but still, he doubted he would ever meet a more extravagant, wild and exigent woman when it comes to home decorations and her own appearance, but that still had a no nonsense attitude and was as foul-mouthed as a truck driver. 

This stark contrast, to this day, made his head spin so much that he simply went with the flow while trying not to laugh to himself as he undressed.

As she had said, the bathtub was already filled with hot water, which was good for the cold night; it was a little shallow because otherwise, given its size, the water would overflow. He was a big man, afterall.

A thought comes into his head, “She thinks about everything, doesn't she?”

The sudden thought ended up eliciting a mischievous half-smile from him. Yes, that woman thought of everything, including the best ways to take advantage of a poor motherfucker who until recently was a lost cause in terms of interactions with the opposite sex. But he would never complain about that, because he was learning a lot from her. Not only to be a better lover, but to be a better friend and person as well.

He enters the bathtub after having undressed completely, closing his eyes and letting out a low sound of pleasure as the hot water enveloped him, up to his chest. He rested his arms on the edges of the bathtub, throwing his head back a little "Damn, this is one of the best things you could do at the end of a long day... you can almost nap in here..."

"I do it often," Akane appears at the door, coming closer to him "Even more so after I had a really busy day," she sits on the closed toilet seat, on the edge of the bathtub, enjoying the view "Feel free to relax."

"I already am…," He jokes, smiling at her "But what about you? A bathroom isn't the best place in a house to keep your clothes on, you know…?"

"I know... I'm just enjoying the view for now...," 

"Oh, feel free to enjoy it, but you can also enjoy it while your sausage is warm from the water," He laughs, while she gets up and opens a side cabinet, where there were some hygiene products "So... are we going to have a party at Butch's house?"

"Yes, we will! A Christmas party with everything we could ask for, a courtesy from Aunty! But we still need to bring booze."

"Aunty? You're hopeless, man, if she hears you...," She laughs softly, taking a weird little ball from the cabinet "Anyway... I'll go for a casual look, since the girls will be there, and Kanami's house usually has a more cozy atmosphere."

She takes off the loose shirt she was wearing, and... oh, what a surprise, she wasn't wearing anything underneath. She takes off her glasses too, throwing her curls around to loosen them. She sighs, approaching the bathtub and throwing the ball she had in her hand inside of it. The ball hits the water and immediately starts to sizzle, releasing good-smelling bubbles.

"Yeah, it's some sissy shit but I love it. Shut up," she says as she was getting into the tub, and the water overflows when she sits on his lap.

"Hnn…," He shivers slightly, the middle of his legs being duly graced by her ass, which for him was very welcome "I deal well with other people's sissy shits if I'm well rewarded for it, you know," And he hugs her to his chest, bringing her closer, one hand already going to lazily play with one of her tits.

"The view is enough for you, don't lie," she uses a little bowl to catch some water and pours it on his head, wetting his hair "Did you come to spend the night here? "

He closes his eyes so the water doesn't get into them, blowing some, the droplets spreading around "Yeah, the view is pretty awesome... and I'd like too, if that's okay. It's freezing cold outside... returning home in the early hours of the morning would be torture... it could start snowing today."

"The forecast said it was likely," he feels, still with his eyes closed, her nails massaging his scalp, applying some kind of shampoo with a subtle scent there "In that case, you’re more than welcome. I think I have something in my room that might help you. If I remember correctly I have a pair of sweatpants, so you don't tease me early in the morning," and she laughs softly.

He laughs along with her... and then wonders how a single woman, who lived alone and was so thin could have sweatpants that fit him. Was it someone else's? The thought wasn't the most pleasant, but damn, it was either that or his dick would shrink two inches from the cold, and that was the last thing he needed that night.

"Fine by me. And I hope it's not yours, because if it is I'll finally find out how guys who have a fetish for wearing panties feel, hahaha!"

"Hahaha, no, dumbass, I bought it for you," she presses her nails into his scalp, laughing "I knew that one time or another you'd end up spending the night here, so I took precautions," She throws some water in head head, rinsing his hair.

He chokes on the water, such is his amazement. He wipes his eyes quickly, blinking awkwardly at her.

"What… did you buy me sweatpants? Really?!"

"And why not? Or do you prefer to sleep in jeans?," She raises an eyebrow "I don't think so," She continues to wash his hair, her expression unchanged, but still seeming a little embarrassed by his surprise; her already small mouth had turned into a pout due to her full lips.

 "No, that's not it! It's just...," He doesn't know what else to say, even more disconcerted when he sees her embarrassment. He tries to get back on track by hugging her again, his hands around her hips, her breasts pressed against his chest. And for the first time in two months, the proximity didn't turn him on. It only increased that strange heat in his chest "It's just that no one had done something like that for me before. Damn, woman... you're making me feel like a fag here, making me all emotional like that, hahaha..."

"Then shut up and just accept it," she laughs a little "And that's not fag shit, you're just happy, and even though it's for a silly reason. It's just like you," she shakes her head "An extroverted through and through," and she continues playing with his hair "And you're my friend, so... it's just consideration, no big deal. "

He laughs through his nose, thanking the heavens from the bottom of his heart for the water she poured over his head, since he could use it to disguise any sign of emotion. Because for a tiny second, he felt his eyes burn. And crying in front of her would mean exposing a fragile side of him that he flatly refused to expose, even more so to that woman, who he wanted to continue seeing him as a friend, protector and a respectable sexual partner, and not as a crybaby who needed to be comforted all the time. He tries to interrupt that flow of disconcerting thoughts by closing his eyes, enjoying the caresses on his scalp while hiding his face on her chest, between her breasts.

"Fuck, you're such a… no, seriously, thank you. Now I’m going to think of something nice to give you in return…"

"Nah, you don't have too," she rinses his hair again, putting the bowl aside and grabbing a soap bar "I did it for myself too. Now seriously, let me finish washing your hair. It's a mess and I can't stand seeing it like that."

"I didn't have time to take care of it these days, my bad. And it wouldn't cost me anything to give you something too, come on. I usually only bring you food when I visit, not counting my sausage," He jokes in an attempt to push those strange emotions deep down in his gut again "What would you like to get? An appointment at a nail salon? Some extensions for your hair? A pair of stilettos that can be used as weapons if necessary?"

She laughs at the last one, shaking her head.

"I don't need any of that," she looks at him, and her expression is strange "Okay, you'll accompany me on a thrift store hunt. Don't make that face, you'll have fun, I guarantee it."

"... Alright then," He nods, sighing "I want to return the favor, afterall. Let’s go hunting for cheesy things to buy at a bargain price. Maybe some heart pillows to match your monster in the living room, so I have somewhere to rest my head while you ride me," And he slowly squeezed her buttocks while he lightly nibbled between her breasts. She laughs at the answer.

"You really liked my couch, huh," she jokes, shivering with his touches "Wait until you try my bed…"

He looks up at her "Good idea. Now that I'm thinking about it, I've never been in your room before," He says, surprised. Akane had never invited him into her room, and he had never suggested for them to go have sex there, both because he respected her need for privacy and because he really liked that fuzzy monstrosity in the living room. And now he wondered why she had that preference "You never invited me and I never asked..."

"Oh, it's because it's messy," She blushes a little "It's where I keep my stuff... and I have a lot of stuff," she concentrates on scrubbing his skin so she doesn't have to look at his eyes "And it's also where my sewing supplies are, so expect to see patchwork everywhere."

"Oh... believe me, I have no room to judge. My place is messy too," He shrugs calmly "Mess has never bothered me. And honestly, all things considered, I might like it as much as I like the rest of your place. All this cozy cheesiness and such," And he relax underneath her hands, enjoying the feel of the soap sliding across his skin, the hot water undoing all the tension in his muscles accumulated throughout the day.

She smiles. "I'm glad you don't mind. And it's also not fair for me to make you sleep on the couch when there's so much space on my bed... and it's a cold night too, so your presence is more than welcome," she runs her hands over his face and then stops "Oh, I didn't notice... you didn't shave before coming?"

"I'll gladly accept the offer, ma’am. And I ended up leaving it like that, I jumped outta bed in a hurry and didn't had time to shave," He pouts at the way she pressed his cheeks, smiling like the cute idiot he was "Do you like it? If so, I can leave it like this more often."

"Look, I don't mind shaving, I like it both ways, but this looks great on you too," she smiles, and then lets him go, becoming more serious "Okay, you're all clean. Now get out and let me wash myself up too. You take too much space," she bites his neck "Use that big whit towel on the basket. Now scram."

He shivers at the bite, laughing afterwards.

"Hey, I let you wash me, didn't I? It's only fair that I return the favor," He raises an eyebrow, smiling as he picks up the soap and the sponge "You know how good I am with my fingers. Don't you want to try 'em out in other areas?"

She smiles "You'll end up just groping me and making me horny. We won't be able to leave the bathtub even after the water gets cold...," she squinted at him "If you want to do it so badly then be chaste about it, you pervert."

"Are you doubting my ability to behave and do things like that without ulterior motives? ... Yeah, you wouldn't be the first or the last," He snorts, pouting when she laughs "Seriously, I want to try! I'm feeling quite generous today, so you should take the opportunity. And besides, I prefer to do our funny business on your bed, because this water will soon cool down."

"Stop messing around," she turns her back, sitting on his lap and moving her hair away "And don't make me wait," she looks at him mischievously.

"So fucking bossy...," He grumbles, but promptly obeys, rubbing the soap on the sponge and then sliding it across her skin, slowly, cleaning and adding some light pressure from his fingers on her muscles. He takes the opportunity to kiss her on the back of the head in the meantime, as innocently as he can, while bringing her closer so he can wash her chest too.

She smiles and lets him do it. She seriously thought about provoking him with moans, but when she felt his effort, she held back. But that didn't mean she couldn't relax with the massage he was giving her, even if involuntarily. He had said he had strong hands and she knew he did. But there was something about it, even though he knew how to control that strength well, he still had a somewhat rough touch, one that she liked, because, all things considered, he was extremely gentle with her.

Some intrusive thoughts came to ruin the mood, stupid memories of painful touches long ago, coming from people she thought she could trust, which made her tense.

She feels his fingers pause momentarily, seeming to hesitate. And then she hears him ask, "Hey... am I making you uncomfortable? I'll stop if you want to, okay?"

"No… it's not you. Just some annoying stuff that came to my mind. Don't worry. It's just old ladies gossiping and things like that," she diverges the subject.

"Hnn... okay," He says simply, realizing that she didn’t want to extend the subject. He felt a certain relief in parts, because he was terrible with traumatic or sentimental issues. But on the other hand, he also felt a certain guilt. He remembered all the things his friends had already told him, about how inconvenient and clueless he could be about things like personal space, especially when it came to women. After a few good blows to his ego, he had become much more aware of those flaws. And he felt distressed at the thought that he might be inflicting them on her.

He tries not to think about it too much, finishing with her chest, managing not to play with her breasts too much, and then imitates what she did with her hair, putting shampoo in his hand and rubbing it slowly, taking the opportunity to appreciate the various colors that appeared beneath those golden locks. He smiled with himself.

"That seems like a lot of work. Do you do things like that in the salon?"

"Not often, and not in colors like these. I use more of the normal ones, black and shades of brown... sometimes a redhead when someone gets divorced, ahahahaha," She says, being happy to have a new subject to focus on "I do more haircuts and hairstyles that use hairspray, and to not lose practice, I test it on myself. There are times when I wanna die of boredom, but old ladies at the salon are pretty good friends. There are times when they treat me like I'm still sixteen, but oh well, what can I do...," She leans back against his chest "It's not like I've changed much since then," She smiles, relaxing.

Okay, she seemed relaxed enough, so he wasn't the problem. He sighs in relief.

"I can relate to that, hahaha," He bends down a little to touch the curve of her neck with his nose, still massaging her scalp "And most of the clientele must be old ladies, right? It must be boring as hell. I'd schedule an appointment with you there if it wasn’t for the anti-male brigade that threatened to fry my eggs, hahaha.”

She laughs again, "Exactly... but they're right. That salon is a woman-only temple, and there are things that men cannot hear under any circumstances. And… you can still book an appointment with me, right here at home. I’ll give you a discount. I love doing freelance jobs," She turns her head, looking at him "Because they're always the most fun".

"I'm in! I'll just wait for the end of year bonuses to come in, I kind of emptied my wallet...," He makes a face while picking up water with his hands "Close your eyes...," He instructs before pouring water over her head "Thank fuck the guys came up with this hotpot, because otherwise I would spend Christmas eating noodles in my apartment or in a bar, drinking my ass off, hahaha..."

"Hey, what about me? You have me too, dummy," She whimpers "I would probably be watching movies or getting drunk at home or making things to wear or give as gifts next year," she helps him rinse her head, and then she gets out of the bathtub "Shall we?"

"Uh... would you stay with me for Christmas, if we didn’t have another party to attend?," He blinks, and then he smiles, getting up from the bathtub to go with her "I would be in! It's just that I thought you would have arranged something else if I hadn't invited you, like a night-out with your friends, or a party with your family..."

"I don't have any family," she dries herself, handing him a towel meanwhile "Well, not anymore. I don't want to spend the holidays with the salon ladies either. My Gyaru friends, or ex-Gyarus, already had their own plans too. I remember one invited our group to an Izakaya but everyone else declined, so if it was just me and her there it would feel like a date, according to her. I told her to stop being dumb and she told me to fuck off. We ended up not going out, afterall," she shrugs.

"Well, I made that invitation at the right time then, haha ," He laughs a little, trying to hide a sudden outburst of sympathy by hiding his face in the towel as he dries himself. So she didn't have a family? He understood the situation perfectly. Biological family had always been a sensitive topic for him, so he understood her need to not talk about it more tha necessary. He didn't need any fucking biological family anyway. He had a stepfamily with all the friends he had made in recent years. And maybe she had something like that too "And ex-Gyarus, huh? Traitors to the lifestyle? 

"More or less. They just changed their views, it's normal. Some of them still keep some remnants of it, but it's like something from a punk phase or a rebellious phase, you know. At some point there are people who find those studded coats a pain to wear, and there are girls who, when they leave their teens, realize that that lifestyle doesn't suit them. I… well, not only does it suit me, but I embrace it…" 

"Hunf," He sniffs with a certain haughtiness, one hand on his hip while the index finger of the other scratches his nose "So it's just you and me, the pillars of fidelity to a lifestyle, while the rest conforms over time. I won't stop bleaching my hair, and you won't stop being a Gyaru, and that's what makes us badass, hehe," And he playfully pats her on the hip, making her smile. 

"Yes, in my case I was never anything else. I've always had this tanned skin, y'know. My friends were jealous because I didn't need artificial tanning to achieve this tone," she covered herself with the towel until she remembered who was next to her "C'mon, I'll show you my room. Your pants are there anyway."

And she leaves the bathroom, drying her hair with a towel, putting her glasses back on her face.

He follows her quickly, drying his hair and shoulders too, not bothering to tie the towel around his waist, either "I'm right behind you. And you can tan so easily... the beach would be another nice place for us to go, just so I can see it with my own eyes," He smiles, enjoying the sway of her hips without any shame.

"I'd love to. It's been a while since I've been to the beach, I'd been a little... eh... uninterested. But I intend to in the near future, I love summer," they quickly arrive at the bedroom door "And... eh... sorry about the mess in advance."

She opens the sliding door, and Rihito smells the pile of clothes (clean but put away) before he even enters. Yes, as he suspected, the bedroom was the largest room in the house, but it seemed small with the amount of things piled up there, and none of them, interestingly, were decorative. There were at least three closets, one with a huge mirror on the door, the other two made of wood, and they all had clothes inside, organized on hangers. On the other side, there was a shelf full of drawers with labels, saying “silk”, “chiffon”, “polyester”, “beads” and others. In another corner, barely visible, there was a very vintage, old-fashioned sewing machine, black and with a foot crank. The environment looked like the dressing room of a famous artist or the home of a costume designer who shared the apartment with the tacky owner who owned the couch. In the center, beyond the window on the wall, he wasn't surprised to found a double bed with a heavy, plush duvet, with a Frankenstein-like amalgam of hundreds of different, furry animal fur prints. Saying it was tacky would be an understatement, but he already knew it was all her: so tacky that it was actually beautiful.

"Yeah... this is my... eh... my bedroom-studio," She looks at him, blushing "I told you I sew most of my clothes".

He smiles a lot as he enjoys the immensely colorful and extravagant mess "Wow, would you look at that. The pink monster in the living room swallowed the 70s and threw everything up right here, eh," He laughs at her "I loved it, like the rest of the house, hahaha! And yes, you said you sew your own clothes. Did you find that sewing machine at a thrift store too? I think one of these costs a fortune on the internet."

"No. It's a family heirloom," She smiles a little tenderly "It was from my mother's side. But it was the only thing besides me that she left, and this beauty still works today, so it's still with me," She nods "It must already have a soul within itself, with how old it must be."

"Ooh…," He nods, trying to hide his embarrassment, wondering if he should say something. Damn, he was starting to get frustrated with his own insensitivity. Well, the others had always told him... "Maybe it has, who knows? If you took such good care of it all these years... it must've become the protector of the apartment or something. She and that pink monster, beating the shit outta intruders to keep them from disturbing the Force, haha."

"Ahahaha… very likely. If you were surprised by my pink monster, then it must definitely have a sense for disturbances in the Force. It's aura is very unique, as Butch said," she covers the machine and the table with a heavy cloth. She was probably working on something before he arrived "And again, you reacted much better than I expected...," she opens an embarrassed smile, blushing a little, as she sits on the bed.

"I didn’t react badly to your vintage porn couch, why would I react badly to your room?," He shrugs, unconcerned "I already told you, I like the atmosphere in your apartment. All the cheesiness is fun. And I find it cozy. It's not like those houses of stuck-up rich people that look more like a dentist's office, where everything is white, cold and there's not even a fucking plant in a corner. It's a house that really looks like a house, where there are people actually living, not just existing. Do you understand me? Or am I talking nonsense? I don't know, I just know that I like it and that's it."

She smiles "Yeah, I understand, and I think the same. I like colors," she lies down on the bed "And interesting things to look at. And you can get a sense of the personality of the person living there. I think you look at a jaguar print on a dress in a store and think 'Akane', right? Or cheesy and furry things in general."

He... he had been a little amazed to find that she was right. How many times in the last two months had he passed by a thrift store on his way to the fridge or the gym, seen things like leopard print rugs or pink plush dice and immediately thought that Akane would to have one of those? Four? Five? It was kind of impressive that he was able to remeber her tastes that well and had learned to make associations automatically, without anything needing to remind him of that. Was this what happened when you became intimate with someone? Did things that reminded you of that person start to appear frequently? Or have they always been there and you simply become more interested in them?

He didn't know, and that complex monologue was already overheating the simple machine that was his brain, leaving him frustrated. He dispels those conjectures by doing what he does best: smiling and being a hopeless pervert.

"Sometimes. And what reminds you of me every day? The sausage you buy at the butcher's?"

She laughs loudly and turns her back to him on the bed, still laughing, even letting out a light snore before composing herself "No... not exactly...," she doesn't turn around, letting him look at her back "But now that you mentioned it, I'll put it on the list."

Her back, exposed like that, naked and sporting those almost imperceptible bikini lines, was too tempting for him to resist. He approaches, climbing onto the bed, supporting himself on his elbows and knees above her, and she feels his lips touching the base of her neck, descending with a slowness that makes her shiver.

"I want to hear about the other items on that list later…"

Akane shivers at his touch, smiling a little, turning her head so he has better access to her neck "Oh... I have some... like... I was watching a movie where one of the guys was splitting wood and he picked up the wood and ripped it in two with his fingers. For some reason it reminded me of you and that coin. I see… hnmm… a fit guy leaving the gym, then I… you're going to think it's crazy, but I keep thinking that you could easily beat his ass. And also... cats. Big cats...," she turns around, pulling him into a hug, while sighing "And for some reason a very big and fluffy golden retriever from a neighbor reminded me of you, but I apologize for that, because I laughed," she laughs softly.

He had to hold back for a while not to grab her right there, exultant with the comparisons as he returned the hug "Splitting logs in half, huh? Yes, I can do that, I'll even show you later if you want... and I certainly have the capacity to beat some gym rat's ass, but it won't happen because I don't want to be arrested, hahaha! And I'm a leopard, lady, just like you... but a golden retriever?," He blinks. And then he smiles scathingly "I'm a leopard, but I can also be a dog. Raawn!," And he nibbles her neck, then licks it.

She gasps, laughing, and hugs him more "Ahaha, hnmmm... I know, but part of it is because you're both blonde and cute," she then blinks, a little surprised by what she said, making a pout.

He looks up at her, equally surprised. Boy... had she called him there to have sex or to make him all disarmed and dumbfounded every five minutes? He manages to recover relatively quickly, however, smiling mischievously "Oooh, I think I understand... today you want me to be cute, then? I can do that. I'm going to be adorable," And he kisses her, his tongue asking for passage, his cock slowly brushing between her legs.

"Ooh," she lets him kiss her, and thanks the heavens that he is stupid, or at least ignores these things. She didn't really want to think about it. She hugged him with her legs, passing her thighs along his sides "Yes... but not too adorable, I'm not made of porcelain," she jokes, and her nails passed over his torso, tickling him in a good way "I'm not much in the mood for foreplay, anyway," she looks at him, biting her lip; her eyes were light brown, but like when she was using blue contacts, they were very intense.

He shivers with the feeling of her nails running across his skin, with the heat between her legs, and especially with the words spoken. He was already getting hard as a rock "Hnnn... not even a little tongue? We're being very straightfoward today...," He jokes, his hands massaging her breasts, his thumbs playing with the nipples until they become hard.

"Oonh… I like it, but when I'm a bed with you like this I get wild," she runs her nails through his hair, letting him play with her, panting softly "Hnmm…. so much so that...," she pushes him away a little and turns onto her stomach "I want you like this...," she pushes her buttocks against the middle of his legs, her torso on the mattress, looking at him "Choose your entrance...," she says in a malicious moan "As long as you come in slowly."

He kneels on the mattress, and she sees, over her shoulder, the exact moment his brain turned off and everything else turned on, his green eyes becoming a little unfocused, delight written in every line of his expression.

"Damn, that's the best invitation I’ve been given today…," He leans over to kiss the tattoos on her thigh, moving down to her buttocks afterwards "I accept it… but doing it dry like that won’t be good for you, right? Don't lie to me, you want some of this...," And she feels when his fingers slide from bottom to top along the line of her sex, massaging it, searching for her clit and gracing it as soon as they find it. 

And he is surprised when his finger practically sinks into her heat when he presses a little, before reaching the clit. She gasps more when he moves, shivering all over.

"Ahnn.. I told you… ooh…," she looks at him "But don’t stop, please…"

He would be a complete idiot if he didn't comply with that request. He goes back to kissing and licking her buttocks, positioning his arm more comfortably and then moving his fingers back and forth, moving his phalanges to massage her insides, especially that little elevation he felt when he went up to where her clit was. And all the while he was admiring how wet she was, running on his fingers, his mouth watering at the sight.

"Damn, you got like that without me barely touching you... all this just by imagining me fucking you? Hnn?," He asks in a hoarse growl "Naughty girl... "

"You already know who I am…," she says between moans, looking at him "And I know you were already getting a hard-on just with me invited you in, you big dog. Just me calling you-aaah!," She trembles all over, arching her back, when he touches a sensitive spot beyond her clit.

"Dog... you know what happens when you provoke a dog, right?," He takes a bite there, on the juicy flesh of her buttocks, sucking a little to leave a reddish mark and smiling mischievously at her reaction to the capricious work of his fingers "You get eaten... both ways. Only one thing at a time...," And he presses his face against her ass, giving a nice lick from bottom to top, from her sex to that tight hole between the buttocks, and her stays there, his tongue caressing it while his fingers work vigorously. 

"Aaaah...," She trembles all over "Oh, fuck yeah... Rihito, this is torture," she doesn't make any move to stop him, however "I love that tongue, and those fingers, ooh... they make me melt, aahn...," she was so wet that her juices ran down his fingers.

Her praise made him even more hallucinated, hard as a rock, and even more desperate to devour her and extract more of those sounds. He makes her lift her buttocks so he can move his arm more freely, loving the sight of his fingers moving in and out of her, the pink flesh hugging them in a way that makes him ache for his dick's turn. He licks her butthole in the meantime, kissing it afterwards, saying in a low growl, "Ask for it. And don't play coy with me. I want to hear it, Akane..." 

"Ahnn… eat me, c'mon… fuck my pussy and fill my ass up...," She asks, and in such a sultry way… she even wiggles her buttocks in his face "I know you want it too…," she leaves her glasses on the bedside table and when she comes back, she hands him a package. He knew exactly what it was.

"Fucking hell, woman...!," He takes his soaked fingers out of her, almost panting with excitement, bending down to give that juicy flesh a long lick before picking up the condom, wraping himself up as quickly as he can before positioning himself, his huge hands firm on her hips "Yeah, lift that ass for me... hnnnn...!," And he shivers as he enters her all at once, being immediately pressed into that delicious, warm grip that made him a little dizzy "Fuck, there's- there's nothing better to do in this cold...!"

"Aahnn!," She moans loudly "That's it, c'mon, fuck me! hmmm!!," she lifts her torso a little, to arch her back more "Say you love this, say you'll always want to fuck me!"

She was a vocal girl, she knew that, but she always had this fear of being foul-mouthed with her partners, so much so that she had heard complaints or even hands over her mouth several times... but with Rihito... no, with Ichiro, she knew that he loved every note and every sound she made, and he even asked for more. This euphoria was everything to her.

And holy fuck, how much he loved it. He holds her even tighter, grunting like the dog she accused him of being as he thrusts into her, slamming his hips into hers with loud, wet sounds, rotating his hips to make sure he hits her in all the right spots "Damn, I want...! I want to fuck you every day, all the time, I can't stop thinking... hnnnn...! Thinking about those beautiful tits, that ass, that pussy...! And your face..."

She raises her torso even more, placing her back against his chest "I want it too, I'll never get tired of such a hot motherfucker, aaaahn!," She grabs his neck, bringing his head to touch her shoulder "Oohhh yes, I love it... more... hold me tight, don't let me get away... Ichirooo...!"

And the sound of his real name was like a magic word. He grabs her willingly while biting her on the shoulder, growling, keeping her in place like a male cat biting a female's neck, the pounding of his hips against hers becoming even more merciless.

"Gruunf...! I'm not going to... you're gonna stay here with me, you're gonna let me fuck you and make you come all night, you're not gonna leave my side...!," And one of his hands moves between your legs, his fingers firmly on her clit, his strong, hoarse breathing in her ear, an extremely welcome sound as an accompaniment to those wet pops.

"Aaanh! Yessss...!," she moans loudly, and when she is touched she practically whines, facing him, her breasts bouncing with his thrusts "K-Keep going, Ichiro, I love when you fuck me like that, uughnn... I love it...!," The view of her mouth open, her sexy face, with her eyes closed facing a window showing the dark night sky, the snow falling outside... it was something that would remain engraved in his memory.

He stares at the window with snow piling up on the eaves, the dark sky seeming to be dotted with white spots that fell in a slow dance, the ecstasy of the climax arriving seeming to make the scene more surreal, intimate, cozy... and then he lets out a deep sound of pleasure, the back and forth getting rougher, as well as his fingers "Fuck, Akane...! I'm almost there, come with me, squeeze me tighter...!"

"Aaannn, me too, Ichiro… don’t stop-aaahh! Ahhhnn!," She squeezes him hard, with her arms and with her insides, while shaking hard, bouncing on top of his dick while riding her climax "Ohhh... Ichiroooo... I love... oohhh..."

"A-Akane...! hhnNNG...!," He locks his hips, holding her tight against him, and damn, cumming hard while he was inside that wonderful woman while snow was falling outside in the silent night was an almost magical experience, fuck how cheesy that is sounded! He then goes limp, resting his forehead on her shoulder, breathing heavily. She feels his lips sliding there, on her skin, in a small kiss. "Holy shit... I love it too... shit, I've really missed you..."

He ends up sitting on top of his own legs while she sat on top of him, still panting her, leaning against him.

"Oh... me too," she turns her head and kisses him. "Hmmmm," she lets him go slowly, looking into his eyes. In that light, her eyes were even more bright, and she looked at him with a face full of want that gave him goosebumps.

He looks back at her, his eyelids heavy, his face sweaty and his breathing still labored. Her eyes looked like a cat's in the dim light, bright and penetrating... yes, there was no better nom de guerre than 'Panther' for her. He smirks, a shiver running down his spine. "Good to know... because I didn't forget that request of yours... about filling your ass up. Just let me recover first...," He gets rid of the condom (good thing there was a little trash bin next to the bed. She'd certainly thought of everything, huh), and then makes her turn over onto her back, slowly laying on top of her. A hand goes up to her face, giving her another kiss, and then he rests his head between her breasts, an idiotic smile of satisfaction taking over his face. "You're so fucking hot that I can barely stand it, haha…"

"Hnmm... with someone as hot fucking me, is hard not to be," She hugs his neck, keeping his face between her breasts, caressing his head. "Hmm... I love this feeling... the aftergloow ... hmm," She hugs him more "It makes me melt..."

"Me too... I don't even want to get out of bed to eat...," He murmurs, almost moaning with her caressing his hair. "Even more so in weather like this, hnnn... damn, this bed is almost as good as the pink monster in the living room, yes sir..."

"Haha, I told you… good thing there's enough space for both of us and very warm blankets…," She pulls out a pillow and adjusts herself on it… then she lifs her eyes and sees it. "Oh, just as the forecast predicted. It's snowing outside… it's a very nice sight when you're inside a cozy room, right?"

"Hell yeah!," He turns over in bed too, looking at the window. "I kinda saw it two minutes ago, but I ended up forgetting. You are a sucker of memories, as well as souls, hehehe!," And he puts a hand on her back, watching the snow fall with a happy smile "The first snowfall of the year…"

"Hnmm… yeah…," she says nothing more than that, caressing his head with her nails, as if combing his hair, a smile on her lips.

He reciprocates by caressing her back more, his fingers very gentle, almost affectionate, seeming perfectly happy to just stay there, enjoying the moment with her. He covers them both with the blanket (colorful, fuzzy and patterned, because if it weren't, it wouldn't be Akane, after all), murmuring against their skin, "Thank you for inviting me to come here. On a night like this, it's better to sleep with someone than alone."

"I agree... and I wouldn't leave you in the cold like that, honey," She kisses him on the top of his head. "Thank you too."

In the silence of the room, with his body still not very tired, his thoughts did some pirouettes until they reached what his friend had said. The First Snow… He chuckles. 

"Hey, lemme tell you something funny. I exchanged a few texts with Okubo before arriving here. Guess what he was gonna do with Tomori," And he indicates the window, which had already accumulated a certain amount of snowflakes on the sill, with a gesture of his head.

"Let me see… Tomori and I are birds of a feather, but she loves cheesy shit… so some really good sex, with hot cocoa and fluffy blankets on the side?"

"The Egghead loves that shit too, even though he doesn't admit it, that's why they're perfect for each other," He laughs more "And that's exactly it, but that would be the consequence of their original plans. They went to see the First Snow," He rolls his eyes with a smile that she saw was more affectionate than mocking "Some kind of winter magic and whatnot…"

"Really? What kind of magic?," She blinks "Never heard of it...," She blinks,  and then she seems to remember. "Oooh, it's a Korean superstition about the first snowfall of the winter," She smiles at him. "It's just that they believe that if a couple confess to eachother as soon as the First Snow falls, the love between them become pure as snow, so it will last forever...," She laughs softly "Tomori kept telling me that, and she and I watched some Korean soap operas that had that trope in them. Kinda cute, but… that's… eh…," She sighs, looking disbelieved.

"Oh, so it's Korean? I didn’t know that. But yeah, that's exactly it! The gayest shit to end all the other gay shit," He has a small coughing fit while laughing. "My bro was never into that stuff, but he found a girlfriend and immediately let the hopeless romantic that always existed inside him come out," He pouts , making kissing sounds, and then he looks out the window at the snowy night. "Eh, he's as happy as a clam, and that's what matters..."

He turns to her. Then he notices her thoughtful expression. The smile fades from his face.

"Uh… I'm just joking, okay? I don't think less of those who believe in that stuff, I just think it's funny..."

"It's okay. It's not like you can actually kiss someone under a snowfall and shazam! True love...," She snorts, shrugging a bit. "But I'm happy for my friend. Good for them..."

"... Yeah," He looks at the covers, before looking up once again, admiring the dark winter night outside. "I don't have any experience in the department, so I can't say much. But I know that, with those two specifically, it wasn't a Disney movie or all the shit we see in soap operas. I saw everything unfold from the beginning. I know they built something nice and solid together. So this First Snow shit seems a bit unnecessary in their case. But yeah... I'm happy too." 

"Huhum…," she strokes his head once again. "Tomori told me some things while it was all happening, but I couldn't do much for her, unfortunately. I was in a tight situation myself, but when I managed to settle everything, I went to talk to her, and she told me that they had sorted things out. I was happy for her, she'd been waiting for her special someone for years, and she was lucky enough to bump into her idol at Butch's bakery. But seriously, was that pure coincidence? You guys saw the bakery, got in to have a quick snack and boom! Instant meet cute?"

"Actually, we found out about the bakery through Tokita and his employer, Mr. Yamashita," He tells her, smiling again. "Some crazy things happened that made Miss Kanami need help, and our friend group ended up offering themselves. Because of this, Okubo, Himuro and I decided to go visit the place. We were curious to meet the buff baker," He laughs softly. "And what a surprise we had when the cute  subchef had a burst of happiness when she saw Okubo and ran over to ask for his autograph. You should've seen his face, the happiest dumbass in the whole world, hahaha…"

"Ooh… so it was thanks to the buff couple? How interesting...," She smiles too. "And cute... she got the romance she wanted so much. Now my chest feels all warm, "She looks at him. "And your face looks pretty warm too," She laughs.

He laughs too, all happy, pushing his face between her breasts even more.

"Girl, it'll be warm for the whole night if you let me stay here. But anyway! The Seaweed Head was the pure definition of a clueless virgin, and then, out of nowhere, he and Aunty fell in love. Three months later it was Okubo Tomori's turn. Mr. Yamashita says that Tokita finding someone was the event needed for  some cosmic lock to open, and them things snowballed from there. What do they call this stuff again...," He frowns a little, making a face of hilarious concentration before continuing. "Oh yeah! Butterfly Effect."

"Interesting. And a clueless virgin? Really? A handsome guy like that? He must've been traumatized to his core. Maybe someone fucked him and he ended up not liking it," She wonders. "I've seen people like that."

He shudders, making a slightly scared face.

"Don't joke about these things, Phanter. And anyway, he's not even that handsome! He just has that sulky face that a lot of girls like, I don't know why...," He makes a jealous pout. "But anyway, I don't really know what happened to him, but I know he had a fucked up childhood. And meeting Mr. Yamashita, us and, later, Miss Kanami, gave him the chance to live like a normal person. That's it. He's even making double entendres in our group chat nowadays, the clown..."

"That's good to know," she nods, and the she looks at him, raising an eyebrow "And I wouldn't call it a 'sulky face'... it's pure presence, the aura of someone who doesn't playt around. You know, that person who enters a saloon in cowboy movies, and everyone inside stops whatever they're to look at his face. They're all tense, already thinking that he's going to shoot everyone if someone messes with him... that's what I'm saying. This type of person has this kind of presence for two reasons," She raises two fingers, pointing at eachone. "Either someone fucked him up and he's trying to get revenge, or he ruined a lot of people's lives and enjoyed doing so. In general, women like this kind of guy because it's the aura of someone who doesn't need to prove anything to anyone and has a lot of self-confidence. A lot of girls are deceived by that and fall into his web." 

Her tone, he noticed, was not that of someone who admired this kind of man. She sounded like someone who had seen a lot, to the point of being able to analyze these things from afar and not fall for the trick.

"... Alright, fair enough. Can we stop talking about the Seaweed Head now, please?," He asks, almost whimpering, hugging her tighter. Damn, it was quite a sight, a man that size acting all jealous. It seemed that he didn't get even more mad only because he realized that she was speaking as an analyst and not as an admirer.

"You can have all this confidence too, you know?," She smiles at him, when she notices the pout he made.

He looks up at her. And then he smiles happily.

"I already have it. All thanks to you."

Her eyes widen as she blushes. She was going to tease him about also being fucked too boost his confidence, but he caught her completely off guard. Shit, why did he had to attack her with a cuteness combo? The entire sentence she was formulating went down the drain in her conscience and her chest began to complain about the blow, so she looked away so as not to stare at that human golden retriever with leopard claws.

"T-That's good to know... I was good for something," She opens an embarrassed smile, still mortified. "I'm happy to have helped you, yeah..".

"Don't talk as if your help wasn't a big deal, or I'll be forced to fuck you even harder just to reinforce the message," He stretches a little to reach her lips in a quick kiss. And then he lifts himself up a little, sitting up and taking the covers with him. He calls her as he pats his own lap, smiling more, "Now, since we've succumbed to all that cheesy shit, how about we just go with the flow? I can wear the sweatpants you bought me and then we can stay here, watching the snow fall until we feel hungry," He looks out the window, his eyelids getting heavy, his expression serene. "I have to admit, it's really pretty…"

She looks at him again, her eyes glistening. It was the third time he's seen her with that slightly surprised, even helpless look, as if he had break down a wall that was surrounding her. But it always lasted half a second, with her smiling a little mischievously and shrugging. "Heh. Alright then. If you're going through Hell, walk as if you own the place...," She hugs him, resting her head on his arm "... which I do, since I'm a she-devil."

He laughs loudly, hugging her eagerly and throwing the fluffy covers over the two of them. "Well said. And you can sit on my lap whenever you want while we're doing so, hahaha!"

"Careful what you wish for, big guy," She jokes more, tickling his ribs a little. "Because I’ll do it."

"As if I were going to stop you in any way...," He smiles in the same way after laughing with the tickles, reciprocating with a firm grip on her tattooed thigh. They ended up getting into a playful fight, while she furiously tried to tickle him and he calmly parried her blows, barely using any strength. As expected, Rihito ended up winning, pinning Akane by her arms to the bed. Their movements caused something to fall from the bedside table with a thud, and when they realized with alarm that it had only been a plastic lamp, neither of them could hold it, laughing loudly. 

Deciding the game was over, but still laughing, they arranged the pillows so that they made a soft backrest where they could relax, slouching on them under the covers.

And then they stayed there, hugging each other, watching the first snow of the year fall.

Next chapter Here

[herhours]

even when i force my new emotional intensity/dysregulation to be moderated, like at the funeral, it still seemed to show up later in a dysfunctional form of processing. is this just going to be what my norm is now if and until i find a way where my life just doesnt cause me to constantly experience negative emotions? or is this something i should be able to have control over altering? im not sure what it would look like to constantly force down my emotions but i have to assume that will have very unhealthy consequences in the long run. what is a person supposed to do when their emotional functioning has been disturbed and is dominated by negative affect if they do not find a way to actively experience positive affect? what if nothing in my life is ever good again, am i just going to have this fucking brain damage? if i cant find positive emotions and just turning off my negative emotions is bad for me what fucking option does that leave me?

it feels fucking dumb to know exactly the things that are happening here and it having no impact on how things turn out.

[asthmark]

❝ chemistry ❞ o.st

synopsis → osaki shotaro moving to town means trips to the dance studio, boba dates, and the perpetual teasing of lee donghyuck. 

pairing → shotaro, reader

requested? → yes! based off @onlyjihoons​​’s shipping game answer ♡

word count → 5.5k (this was supposed to be 1k.... goodbye.)

a/n → i enjoy writing texting scenes WAY too much ;; tbh this is like 50% texts im cryign but i had to convey how much i love 00 line .... and also how firmly i believe in lee donghyuck devil supremacy. as always, feedback is greatly appreciated and enjoy! 

+

if someone were to ask you how you felt about your friends, you would without any hesitation, answer that you loved them to death. of course, if you were being completely honest, you would also have to add that you experienced the urge to strangle them from time to time. that might earn you a couple odd stares but you’re sure people would be more understanding if they knew who was in your inner circle to begin with.

for starters, there was lee jeno — tall, handsome, and the textbook definition of a gentleman. then, na jaemin, who you would consider to be the yin to jeno’s yang. an extremely energetic guy and, in your book, a total freak of nature ever since you found out that he inhales four shots of espresso on the daily. liu yangyang was a more recent addition to your group but, being as quick-witted as he was, he quickly fit right in. he also had a habit of going on somewhat aggressive rants in german which renjun found to be extremely amusing. speaking of, huang renjun was another one of your close friends — the shortest of the group, actually. (and, much to renjun’s dismay, that’s exactly how donghyuck liked to introduce him to people.) he was the type of guy you could trust to keep everyone in check which consequently made you mildly terrified of him.

however, it could never compare to the perpetual fear you have of lee donghyuck. 

of course, you love him to pieces but sometimes you really wish he didn’t find so much joy in, well, making everyone miserable. you couldn’t deny it was funny to watch him tease and taunt your other friends. you still remember him purposefully messing up renjun’s game at the local arcade just when he was about to reach his high score — and also the way renjun had tackled him to the floor right then and there, resulting in the six of you being banned from the place. or, that time he offered to pay for everyone’s starbucks orders only to tell the barista that jaemin’s name was ben dover. (to no one’s surprise, yangyang had found that joke particularly hilarious.) you can also clearly recall how hard you had laughed in both of those situations.

but, donghyuck never let anyone laugh for too long.

according to him it was ’only fair’ to make sure each of his friends was at the receiving end of his gags. so, despite laughing at his latest victim’s expense, each of you knew that donghyuck would make sure you were in the same position sooner or later.

you definitely weren’t expecting it to be your turn one dull friday evening.

things are going slow for you as you sit at your desk, typing away on your laptop. school has been out for hours and your professors have decided to be saints and leave you little homework for the weekend. beside you, your phone dings, alerting you of the new text message in your group chat.

[4:23 pm] hyuck: i’m bored 🥺

[4:23 pm] you: plz never use that emoji again

[4:24 pm] nana: it’s misleading dude

[4:25 pm] yangx2: yeah like when have u ever made a face that isn’t this 😈

[4:25 pm] renjun: donghyuck is the devil = confirmed

[4:25 pm] nana: CALLED IT

[4:26 pm] hyuck: u guys are literally so evil

jeno laughed at “u guys are literally so evil”

[4:27 pm] jeno: look who’s talking lol

[4:27 pm] you: dangg u know it’s bad when lee jeno disses u

[4:28 pm] jeno: ...ngl it kinda feels like ur shading me rn

[4:28 pm] you: u would be correct :)

[4:29 pm] hyuck: um HELLO can u guys go back to paying attention to me???

[4:29 pm] renjun: what do u want, diva?

[4:29 pm] hyuck: i just wanna spend some quality time with my best friends ;(

renjun disliked “i just wanna spend some quality time with my best friends ;(”

yangx2 disliked “i just wanna spend some quality time with my best friends ;(”

you disliked “i just wanna spend some quality time with my best friends ;(”

nana disliked “i just wanna spend some quality time with my best friends ;(”

jeno disliked “i just wanna spend some quality time with my best friends ;(”

[4:30 pm] hyuck: OH COME ON

[4:30 pm] yangx2: i think what u meant to say is that u wanna make one of us very miserable today, right?

[4:30 pm] hyuck: .....no comment

nana renamed the group chat “hyuck hate club”

[4:31 pm] hyuck: ok i’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

[4:31 pm] jeno: well now u know what it’s like to be friends with u

[4:31 pm] you: so true king omg ur on a roll

[4:32 pm] hyuck: hmm okay so either jeno or y/n is gonna be today’s target, got it

[4:32 pm] hyuck: anyway can u guys come down to the dance studio now??

[4:32 pm] you: what makes u think i would go anywhere near u when i know ur plotting ur revenge on me as we speak

[4:32 pm] hyuck: because maybe i’ll have mercy on u and just terrorize jeno instead

[4:33 pm] you: good enough for me! thnx bestie, see u soon!!

[4:33 pm] jeno: HEY

nana laughed at “good enough for me! thnx bestie, see u soon!!”

[4:34 pm] yangx2: u literally cannot trust anyone in this friend group

[4:34 pm] renjun: ikr isn’t it great???

you might have been slightly out of your mind to willingly go see donghyuck knowing you had teased him in your group chat earlier. although, if there was a slight chance he would show you mercy if you did hang out with him, you were going to take it.

the studio was where you had first met donghyuck, along with the rest of your friends due to the dance classes you attended. after bumping into each in between classes and during practice, you began to get well acquainted. turns out, the six of you actually got along incredibly well and after a while, you began to share routines and tips, even choreographing together from time to time. obviously, this led to the infamous group chat being formed and lots of time spent outside the studio as well.

but, none of you had lost that love for dancing. in fact, forming your little clique had only made it grow. as you opened the front doors of the building you had made so many memories in, you wondered if donghyuck wanted your insight on a certain routine or needed some help choreographing. of course, there was also the possibility that he really was just bored and wanted you to suffer with him.

what you did not expect, however, was to see him caught up in conversation with another person. you couldn’t clearly see them with donghyuck in the way; all you knew for certain was that your best friend’s mouth was moving a mile a minute. you tentatively tiptoe into the room, hoping to not intrude on their discussion. but, at hearing the doors creak open, donghyuck puts his rant on pause to enthusiastically wave you over.

you sigh, putting your belongings down and approaching the pair. as you near, you notice that hyuck has a huge smile — no, smirk — on his face. you internally curse yourself for believing that he would ever pass up an opportunity to torment you, especially in front of a stranger.

“this is a very dear friend of mine,” you hear him introduce to his acquaintance. “her name is y/n. she dances, too.”

“oh, that’s really cool!”

the stranger’s unusually cheery tone prompts you to finally peek behind donghyuck and put a face to the voice.

and what a face he has.

“this is shotaro,” donghyuck informs you. “he’s new to town and quite the dancer. caught him in the middle of a routine.”

your knees almost wobble as you take in the stranger — shotaro’s — kind eyes that almost sparkle. (you aren’t sure if it’s because of the fluorescent lights of the studio or just part of his charm.) his lips are curved up into a friendly smile that makes you feel slightly giddy. his hair falls into his face almost perfectly, not a strand out of place and you’re uncertain as to how that’s even possible since, as donghyuck had said, he was dancing. not to mention, there’s not a bead of sweat on his face. did this guy come straight out of a disney movie or something?

“excuse her,” donghyuck chuckles. “good looking people tend to make her freeze up. don’t worry, this happened when she met me, too.”

you offer your friend a glare and an elbow to the side and you swear you hear shotaro chuckle. you turn to him instead, putting on a welcoming smile.

“my bad, i just—”

“got lost in his eyes?”

you pinch the bridge of your nose. “donghyuck, please don’t make me have to attack you in front of our guest.”

more giggles escape shotaro. (you swear it’s the prettiest thing you’ve ever heard.) you curiously tilt your head at him.

“sorry, it’s just that, you guys are too funny,” he admits with a sheepish smile.

you mirror his grin, slightly relieved he was amused instead of weirded out. “yeah, well, just wait ’til you meet the rest of us. it’s like a circus show, you’ll love it.”

“hello, clowns!”

“speak of the devil,” donghyuck murmurs, watching as yangyang and renjun enter, followed by jeno and jaemin.

“woah, who’s the cutie?” yangyang asks renjun, in what you presume he thinks is a whisper. however, yangyang has never spoken quietly a day in his life. renjun simply shrugs at his question.

having clearly heard the compliment, a faint blush creeps onto shotaro’s cheeks.

“guys, this is shotaro,” donghyuck answers, tugging the sandy blonde forward.

he gives a somewhat shy wave. “hi, y/n’s friends.”

jaemin erupts into laughter. “uh oh, looks like he likes y/n more than hyuck.”

“don’t blame him,” jeno mutters.

shotaro’s forehead creases, face suddenly twisted in worry. “oh, i’m sorry, was i not supposed to say that?”

“oh no, don’t worry,” donghyuck denies, quickly. “i’m sure y/n doesn’t mind at all, right?”

if you could crawl into a hole to avoid the embarrassment, you would. of course, donghyuck was 100% right; you really didn’t mind shotaro calling the group that if it meant you could hear him say your name over and over again. in fact, his sweet voice could probably make the dictionary sound like the most addictive song. but, donghyuck had no right putting you on the spot like that.

jeno suddenly speaks, catching on to your flustered state and donghyuck’s evil grin. “so, it’s y/n’s turn today? sweet, i’m off the hook!”

shotaro furrows his brows slightly. “huh?”

“oh, it’s just an inside joke,” jeno says, smile reaching all the way up to his eyes.

you wish you could strangle him right then and there for finding amusement at your expense but the last thing you want is for shotaro to think you’re some sort of psychopath. (although, with a friend group like this, you’re definitely beginning to think that’s where you’re headed.)

“got it,” shotaro responds, breaking out into a grin himself. “you guys seem like a really close bunch!”

“the closest,” donghyuck corrects, overly sweet, as he wraps an arm around you. (you resist the urge to shove him off.) “you’ll fit right in!”

+

you believed that the torture was over the day donghyuck introduced shotaro to your group. you would probably just see him from time to time and the studio (hopefully without hyuck around) and it would all be downhill from there, right? the latest notification on your phone alerts you that you are absolutely wrong.

hyuck has added one (1) user to the group chat

[1:05 pm] hyuck: welcome shotaro!!

[1:06 pm] unknown: oh hey guys! :]

the emoticon almost makes your heart beat right out of your chest. you roll your eyes in frustration at how easily affected you were by this guy. seriously, why did everything he do have to be so cute? regardless, you quickly add his number to your contacts.

[1:06 pm] hyuck: why don’t we do a little roll call so shotaro can save ur numbers to his phone

[1:07 pm] yangx2: YANGYANG

[1:07 pm] yangx2: HA I WAS FIRST

[1:07 pm] jeno: ...

[1:08 pm] jeno: anyway this is jeno :)

[1:08 pm] nana: jaemin present!

[1:08 pm] renjun: hi shotaro, this is renjun

[1:10 pm] shotaro: haha cool thanks a lot, i just saved all ur numbers!

[1:10 pm] shotaro: but quick question, is y/n in this group chat? :0

you almost drop your phone at reading shotaro’s message although you’re unsure why. he just typed your name, get it together, you urge yourself.

[1:11 pm] you: heyy shotaro! i’m right here :)

[1:11 pm] shotaro: oh yayy! i’m so glad ^^

hyuck disliked “oh yayy! i’m so glad ^^”

[1:12 pm] hyuck: shotaro plz return my love what does she have that i don’t T-T

[1:12 pm] nana: a heart

[1:12 pm] yangx2: a brain

[1:12 pm] jeno: a conscience

[1:12 pm] renjun: a functioning moral compass

[1:13 pm] hyuck: wtf

[1:13 pm] shotaro: ahahaha it’s like i’m watching a comedy

[1:14 pm] you: told u it’s a circus

[1:14 pm] you: i say get out while u still can

[1:14 pm] shotaro: whaatt and leave u behind? no way!

nana renamed the group chat “shotaro x y/n supremacists”

[1:15 pm] jeno: my thoughts exactly

[1:15 pm] renjun: took the words right out of my mouth

you cringe at your friends’ blunt behavior, praying shotaro didn’t find their antics to be too strange.

[1:16 pm] shotaro: 😳

[1:16 pm] nana: aww someone’s shy

[1:17 pm] renjun: he wouldn’t last a day in itzy

[1:17 pm] yangx2: HELPP

you shake your head, laughing silently to yourself as you mute the group chat and place your phone back down. although, moments later, you receive a direct message. you presume it’s one of the boys trying to rope you back into the chat but the moment you see the contact name, you’re forced to do a double take.

[1:21 pm] shotaro: i hope i’m not bothering u but i just wanted to make sure ur okay .. you kinda went quiet in the gc :>

[1:21 pm] shotaro: it’s shotaro from the dance studio btw!

you can’t help but find the fact that he seriously thought you wouldn’t remember him adorable. how could you ever forget a face like his?

[1:22 pm] you: that’s so kind! i’m okay, i promise. i’ve just had to put up with those dorks for way too long, sometimes i just ignore them haha

[1:22 pm] shotaro: lol yeah they do seem like a handful! but i look forward to getting to know them better!!

[1:23 pm] shotaro: and u too ofc~~

it takes all your willpower not to spam dozens of heart emojis in an attempt to show shotaro just how he has reduced you to a lovesick fool. instead, your response is short and sweet.

[1:23 pm] you: right back at u, taro! ♡

+

“okay, take five,” donghyuck pants, pausing the music blaring from the speakers.

you gladly obey, wiping away the light sweat you had worked up from the latest routine you and hyuck were constructing.

you both belonged to the same dance class and frequently paired together for partnered projects. the rest of your friends attended different classes, which you constantly joked was for the best since there was no way one dance instructor could possibly handle the six of you together.

“how do you feel?” donghyuck asks you, running a hand through his tousled hair.

“the choreo’s great, i’m proud of what we got so far,” you reply. “of course, i would be happier if i didn’t have to get so up close and personal with you.”

donghyuck scoffs at your joke. “i can’t do anything about that. the teacher said the whole concept of the routine is supposed to be is intimate.”

you fake a gag, failing to contain a laugh when hyuck playfully shoves you in offense.

“i’m sorry i can’t be shotaro,” he adds, a smirk forming on his lips.

you roll your eyes. “oh, very funny.”

“c’mon, you’re acting like you wouldn’t kill to have him as your partner, especially with choreo as spicy as this.”

“well, it would beat being paired with you,” you remark, picking up your water bottle and taking a swig.

“hm, then looks like today might be your lucky day,” donghyuck replies, eyes trained somewhere behind you.

you follow his gaze, nearly choking on your water as soon as you catch sight of shotaro entering the studio. he meets your eyes, plucking out his earbuds and offering you a small wave.

“oh, hey guys!” he exclaims, cheerfully.

“hey ’taro,” you greet, rather quickly, earning you a knowing glance from your partner.

“’taro?” hyuck repeats, amused, as he folds his arms over his chest. “you guys are already on cute nickname basis?”

shotaro giggles, eyes squinting adorably as he does so. “it is a pretty adorable nickname, right? she’s the only one who calls me that!”

your heart beats faster when you see how oddly excited that seems to make him. did he somehow find it endearing?

“seems like the two of you are becoming quite close, hm?” continues hyuck.

shotaro nods enthusiastically before glancing at you tentatively, as if to check for confirmation.

“yeah, you could say that.”

your agreement causes yet another smile to grace shotaro’s lips — this time he seems relieved. you briefly wonder if the kid ever stops flashing those pearly whites of his. you certainly hope so, or else your heart may never catch a break.  

“well, since you’re comfortable enough with each other,” donghyuck begins, flashing you a grin.

you’re not even sure what he’s gonna say but you already feel the need to put an end to it. after all, nothing good has ever come of donghyuck’s mischievous grins. you subtly purse your lips and narrow your eyes in an attempt to get him to stop whatever chaos he’s planning to ensue.

nevertheless, he proceeds. “maybe you could help me out with this choreography?”

you want to facepalm at donghyuck’s lame excuse of a lie. however, on the other hand, shotaro’s face lights up in delight.

“you’re working on choreo? what for?” he inquires, curiously.

“for our dance class,” hyuck explains, motioning towards you. “i have a couple ideas so i was thinking you two could maybe try out some steps i’m planning to include. you know, to help me... visualize.”

“that sounds awesome,” shotaro responds, oblivious to your friend’s untruths. “i would love to help you guys out.”

“great!” donghyuck claps his hands together. “just a heads up, the theme of the routine is intimacy, so i wanna see all that charm of yours, shotaro. it’ll, uh, help me choreograph.”

you cringe at the obvious fib. meanwhile, it’s as if a switch has gone off in shotaro’s mind. his smile fades and his eyebrows knit together. “hold on, i-intimacy? does that mean—”

“that you’ll have to get a bit touchy-feely with her? yeah,” donghyuck interjects, innocently.

“y’know... i’ve really been wanting to dance with her.” he faces you, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. “just never thought it would be like this.”

you offer him an apologetic smile. “i know, it might be a bit... uncomfortable. you can back out if you’d like. i promise hyuck and i won’t mind.”

shotaro’s head shakes, vigorously. “no, of course not!” he must realize how quick he was to deny your offer, making him suspiciously eager to be close to you as he immediately adds, “i mean, it’s good practice.”

you suppress a giggle. “sure thing. hyuck, should we get started now?”

the boy in question dramatically picks at his nails, acting as if he had been waiting on you both for hours. “if you guys are done flirting, then, yeah.”

you roll your eyes, shooting shotaro a mildly annoyed stare. he grins, finding it to be equally amusing as it is endearing. (what can he say, the faint pout that appeared on your face was cute.)

“shotaro, how about you get in position right behind her.”

shotaro obeys, making sure to leave a significant amount of space between the two of you. however, donghyuck doesn’t seem to approve.

“closer!” he commands. “the concept is intimacy, not social distancing!”

shotaro shuffles forward, pressing his front into your back. you can’t help but notice how firmly toned his chest is. curse his dancers body, you think.

“okay, now, lemme see your hands on her waist!”

you feel the breath of shotaro’s shaky exhale on the back of your neck as he obeys, sliding apprehensive hands around your midsection. there’s silence on donghyuck’s end and through the mirror you watch him observe the two of you, no doubt acting way more pensive than he truly is. you know he’s just prolonging your flustered state by keeping you in this intimate position with the younger boy.

although, shotaro himself might know it too, considering the fact that he begins to rub comforting circles into your sides that he’s currently gripping, as per donghyuck’s request, in an attempt to calm you down. you nearly melt right then and there. at the same time, you hope he doesn’t plan on stopping anytime soon.

donghyuck calls out your name, successfully startling you and putting an end to the peaceful atmosphere. “why don’t you go ahead and lean on his shoulder. just lay your head back nice and easy— good, very good! look at that chemistry!”

if you’re being sincere, reclining on shotaro feels way more natural and enjoyable than it should. he steadily holds you in place, almost as if he secretly wishes to never let go. you wouldn’t be completely opposed to the idea either.

“alright, last thing, guys! y/n, how about you hook your arm around shotaro’s neck?”

you do so, fingers brushing softly against his jaw. he shivers beneath your touch, erupting into giggles when you shoot him an odd stare.

“i’m ticklish,” he confesses, in a whisper.

you can’t help but smile widely. “is that so? hm, i might have to exploit that information sooner or later.”

“as long as donghyuck doesn’t find out,” he replies.

his comment certainly gets a chuckle out of you. “did you finally realize how evil he is?”

“if the torture he’s putting you through right now is anything to go by, then absolutely.”

“only a matter of time before it’s your turn,” you reply. you lean into his ear to add, “by the way, this is anything but torture for me.”

“hey! no whispering!” donghyuck reprimands.

for the first time, shotaro goes against the older boy’s orders to whisper back, “it’s mutual. if anything, i think this is the best thing i’ve done since i moved here.”

your heart melts at the sincere admission. you stare at shotaro in what you’re sure is a very obvious case of heart eyes. you’re taken aback to find that he, too, returns the lovesick look. perhaps he was immersing himself a bit too much in the intimacy concept...

“stop! pause! cut!”

you and shotaro (reluctantly) untangle yourselves from each other to face a seemingly unhappy donghyuck.

“can you guys please just focus on my instructions without falling in love with each other?” he pleads. “i mean, you haven’t even gotten out of the starting position yet.” he groans, exasperated. “actually, you know what, just take five.”

+

[2:03 pm] hyuck: good morning

[2:03 pm] nana: it’s 2 o clock in the afternoon but ok

[2:03 pm] hyuck: i just woke up, therefore it’s morning

[2:03 pm] shotaro: good morning :3 did u sleep well?

[2:04 pm] hyuck: i slept a wonderful 27 hours, thnx for asking!

[2:04 pm] yangx2: ?????? THERES NOT EVEN 27 HOURS IN A DAY IM SCREAMING

[2:04 pm] you: LOLLL WHY WAS HE HIBERNATING

[2:05 pm] renjun: i was just gonna ignore him but i am genuinely concerned now

[2:05 pm] shotaro: woww,, well at least you’re well rested now! :]

[2:04 pm] nana: shotaro, i am begging u not to encourage him

[2:04 pm] you: all it takes is one (1) supportive person and he becomes an unstoppable force of evil

[2:04 pm] shotaro: o_0

[2:05 pm] jeno: besides ur like the only other person here with common sense besides myself and maybe renjun. i can’t lose u to donghyuck :(

[2:05 pm] renjun: ykw i’m not even gonna argue with that

[2:05 pm] yangx2: yeah shotaro is a good guy™

[2:06 pm] hyuck: i hate u guys and ur goldfish attention spans

[2:06 pm] you: sigh what do you need hyuck?

[2:06 pm] hyuck: i want boba :(

[2:07 pm] you: that actually sounds really good but idk if it’s worth being around u

[2:07 pm] hyuck: i’ll pretend like u didn’t just say that <3 what if i paid?

[2:07 pm] you: ....

[2:08 pm] yangx2: LMAO HYUCK BEING NICE IS SUSPICIOUS BEHAVIOR

[2:08 pm] renjun: ikr it’s making me super uncomfortable rn

[2:08 pm] hyuck: can’t i do something nice for my friends? :/

[2:08 pm] jeno: no

[2:09 pm] nana: nope

[2:09 pm] yangx2: nah

[2:09 pm] renjun: absolutely not

[2:09 pm] you: never seen it happen before so no

[2:10 pm] hyuck: u guys are so fake :( shotaro do u wanna hang out with me? if u say no i’ll scream :)

[2:11 pm] shotaro: yeah i guess i could :]

[2:11 pm] renjun: oh this just got interesting.. i guess i could tag along

[2:11 pm] yangx2: me too, i gotta be there to record whatever happens

[2:12 pm] nana: i’m in

[2:12 pm] jeno: same

[2:12 pm] you: hhhhh okay fine.. only to ensure taro’s safety

[2:13 pm] shotaro: (^з^)-︎♡

+

due to the fact that you believed donghyuck was going to try and officially initiate shotaro into your friend group with one of his infamous pranks, you decided to head to the boba shop. you hoped that if you showed up, you would be able to prevent whatever mayhem he had planned or at the very least, provide some damage control.

you pushed open the door to the quaint building, the bell dinging to announce your arrival. your eyes immediately lock onto the table in the far back since it was where you and your friends always sat — you had practically claimed it. you expect to see all the chairs filled but, to your surprise, only one person occupies the space.

osaki shotaro.

he beams, probably relieved to finally have some company in the otherwise empty shop. (after all, you weren’t sure how long he had been sitting there all alone.) nevertheless, you allow yourself to wonder — just for a second —  if maybe he was just that ecstatic to see you. the way he enthusiastically waves you over seems to be in favor of that theory. it’s almost confirmed when you reach he table and he pats the chair beside him.

you let out a soft laugh. “the whole table’s empty, ‘taro.”

“i know,” he admits. “i just really want you to sit next to me.”

you swear you could break down in tears simply from the way he’s looking at you; like you’re all he needs. it’s pure adoration.  you wonder if that’s how you look at him too. you can’t help but ask yourself if he, too, notices your longing stares.

you decide that you would be a monster if you denied shotaro his wish, so, you internally prepare yourself to sit next to possibly the sweetest boy you’ve ever known. yet, that proves to be difficult as said boy stands up to pull out your chair like the gentleman he is. you shoot him a grateful smile, mentally dethroning jeno as the most well-mannered person you know and passing the crown on to shotaro.

“so, how long have you been waiting for?” you ask, resting your elbow on the table and leaning into your palm to stare attentively at the boy to your right.

“actually, i only got here a couple minutes before you. we did agree to meet up here a quarter before three, right?” he asks, slightly confused.

you nod in confirmation. “honestly, i think we got set up.”

shotaro tilts his head. “really? why would they do that?”

“might have something to do with our ‘chemistry’,” you explain, quoting donghyuck.

the japanese boy’s mouth falls agape, as he comes to the realization. “oh, so they literally set us up.”

“mhm,” you agree, smiling ever so slightly.

shotaro must be paying closer attention than you thought because he picks up on your grin. “what’s with the smile?”

you shrug, feigning uncertainty. “i guess i just don’t feel so bad about being set up if it’s with a certain cutie i know.”

“oh?” he raises a brow, cheeks growing as he too mirrors your lovestruck look. “should i be worried about this guy?”

“certainly not,” you reassure him. “i’ve only got eyes for one.”

you see a faded tint of pink rush to his cheeks and you find it adorable how your confession flusters him. you can’t help but caress the supple skin as gently as possible. shotaro leans into your touch, his own hand coming up to cup your own, almost as if he were holding you in place. after a couple moments of basking in the intimate moment, you retract your hand.

“maybe we should try and get hyuck to include that in the choreo, huh?” you suggest, a teasing smile on your lips.

shotaro chuckles, “sounds good to me. i might even ask if i can fill his position, too. if not, i just might get jealous.”

you playfully shove him and he raises his hands in surrender. you chuckle, grabbing one of the menus that litter the table, planning to offer shotaro some help choosing an item from the list that is surely unfamiliar to him but it seems something outside the window behind you has caught his focus instead.

“looks like we have an audience.”

you take a deep breath at his words, preparing yourself for whatever it is you’re going to see upon turning around. when you finally do, all you manage to catch is five heads ducking beneath the windowsill, in a weak attempt to not get caught.

“of course,” you nearly laugh. “they’re so predictable.”

shotaro seems to find the situation humorous as well, if his amused tone is anything to go by. “to be honest, we should be thanking them. they got us together.”

“oh, so we’re together now?” you inquire, raising a brow.

“w-well, i mean, if you want to. i-i definitely want to.”

“no need for stuttering,” you reassure him, reaching over to stroke that one ticklish spot on his neck. “to quote a very wise — and handsome — young man, ‘it’s mutual.’”

he smiles at his own words being recited to him. “i don’t know about you, but i think we should seal the deal.”

“interesting. how do you suppose we do that?” you ask with faux curiosity. you certainly had some ideas of your own.

“maybe... a kiss?” shotaro leans forward, eyes closed expectantly as he taps his cheek. you resist the urge to pinch his lovely, round baby cheeks. he peeks one eye open to add, “for the audience, of course.”

you giggle, completely and utterly love-struck by the boy before you. in fact, you are so enamored by him that you decide to go the extra mile and press a sweet, chaste peck to his lips.

it seems as if he himself didn’t expect it as his eyes snap open, hand coming up to cup his lips in shock. when he finally uncovers his mouth, you see there’s a dazed, giddy grin on his face that let’s you know the smooch was very welcome pleasant surprise.

your phones simultaneously go off, alerting you of incoming messages. it’s a given that it’s none other than the group chat.

[3:15 pm] nana: that smooch was romcom worthy i’m so impressed right now

[3:15 pm] jeno: shotaro is living proof that being a gentleman has its perks! everyone in this gc should take notes!

[3:15 pm] yangx2: HERE IHAVE THE VDIEO OF THE WHOELE THIGN IF ANYOEN WANTS IT

[3:16 pm] yangx2: attachment: 1 video

[3:16 pm] yangx2: SORURY FOR THE TYPSO MY TEARS ARE BLURRIGN THE KYEBIOARD

[3:16 pm] renjun: can we get boba now?

[3:16 pm] renjun: oh wait my bad, congrats to the new couple :-)

[3:16 pm] renjun: to celebrate they should pay for everyone’s drinks.. just a thought

[3:17 pm] hyuck: ur welcome, y/n and shotaro ;)

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Go the Distance

Prompt: Hello, I absolutely adore your work 🥺😍🥺 your Sanders Sides angst is just so goooood!!! If you're up to it, I'd love to request a fic <3 Virgil has noticed [side(s?) of your choice; they're all good choices, I can't decide ;-;] has been distant and avoiding him and he just can't figure out what he did wrong but it's actually because [side] loves him and are trying to take some time to 'get rid of/push down their feelings' The angster the better but don't push yourself ^ Feel free to add or change whatever Have a great day and no worries if you don't do this 💜💜💜~@im-an-anxious-wreck 💜🖤

Thanks for the prompt babe you’re the best

Read on Ao3

Warnings: self-doubt, some lite™ angst

Pairings: prinxiety, background platonic dlampr because found family dynamics motherfuckers

Word Count:  4191

Virgil and Roman's relationship hasn't always been, well, great. But it's been getting better!

Or, at least, it was.

Listen, Virgil knows he and Roman haven’t exactly had the most…painless history. Virgil’s introduction to the series was Thomas telling Roman his dream was to get rid of him and, well, Roman was first and foremost loyal to Thomas. Then the whole…insult thing, ducking out, and the absolute mess of the callback wedding debacle, it’s not exactly been smooth sailing.

 But—okay, and maybe they’d been a little harsher about things than absolutely necessary, and maybe Roman got hit with the consequences of their fights more than Virgil, and maybe Virgil hadn’t exactly been…overwhelmingly accepting of all of Princey’s little ticks.

 But they’d still been talking!

 After the wedding, no one was on good terms with anyone save Patton and Janus—and wasn’t that the shock of a lifetime—and Remus and Virgil. Because they made the smart choice and decided ‘nope, fuck that, I’m out.’

 It was a good choice. You have any idea how high their scores are in GTFO now? The first rundown’s a fucking cakewalk.

 Anyway.

 They’d been talking! Virgil still doesn’t know exactly what happened right after—he saw the video, of course he saw the video, but Roman sunk right to his room and there’s a good twelve hours between that and the next time Virgil saw him—but Roman had come out and approached him!

 Probably because he was still hurt by the end of the video—which oof, Virgil does not blame him for, that was harsh—and his only options were Logan, Virgil, and Remus and Logan, um, didn’t want to see anyone for a while and Remus is Remus.

 Side note: those two have been getting on better. Something about their twin Creativity thing meant Remus knew that Roman was hurting bad before even Thomas did.

 But Roman did seek him out, asking him quietly if he had a moment, just a moment, to sit together. Virgil had shrugged and passed it off as nothing only for Princey to literally sit on the floor and not make a fucking noise. He’d frowned and poked his shoulder, asking if he was alright.

 “Perfectly fine, Dark and Stormy,” Roman had said lightly, “and I’ll leave you in a moment.”

 “But you’re…” Virgil had waved to his silent form. “…not acting like you normally do.”

 Roman had laughed. “And here I thought I’d never hear you say you missed me being loud.”

 “Now let’s not jump to conclusions.”

 Sure enough, a few more seconds had passed and Roman had gotten up, quietly bid Virgil good day, thanked him, and left.

 You bet your ass Virgil sunk straight into Patton’s room to ask hey what the fuck did you do to Roman.

 Patton had sighed and said that they’re not sure what to do now—‘they’ being Janus and Patton. Virgil, still recovering from the whiplash of those two being close had shaken his head and told them to get it the fuck together.

 If he sunk into Remus’s room to ask how to take care of Roman, that’s his business. It’s also his business if he tackled Princey in a hug two minutes later.

 So. Talking.

 Roman, for all he talks, doesn’t really say much. The few things he does say are easily passed off as jokes, off-handed comments that no one really pays much attention to.

 Not that anyone pays nearly enough attention to Roman, come on, guys, he makes it easy.

 But Roman talked to Virgil. He’d come in and sit and Virgil would sit next to him, trying to make sure his arm didn’t burst into flames from where it was pressed against Princey—the dude’s a fucking space heater, okay?—just to listen. Some of the time it was Disney rants—okay, most of the time it was Disney rants—but some of the time…

 “Virgil?”

 “Yeah?”

 Roman looked down at his costume. Today was repair day, unofficially called when Virgil’s hoodie ripped during the night and Roman’s sword cut through his sleeve. Virgil looked up from his own mass of fabric, needle stuck in carefully so he wouldn’t prick himself. He frowned at the look on Roman’s face.

 “What’s up, Princey?”

 “Do you think my logo looks bad?”

 Virgil blinked in shock. Roman didn’t look up and see the surprise on his face, instead running his thumb slowly over the patch on the costume.

 “What the fuck are you talking about, Princey?”

 “It’s so complicated,” Roman said, still looking down, “Logan and Patton have really simple ones. You have a pretty simple one.”

 “Janus doesn’t. Remus doesn’t.”

 “Yeah, but they’re…”

 Virgil frowned deeper, putting his hoodie on the ground and shifting closer to Roman. The prince didn’t even look up, still clutching his logo in his hands.

 “They’re what, Roman?”

 Roman swallowed. “…allowed.”

 A growl sounded from Virgil’s throat before he knew what was happening.

 “And you’re not?”

 “Hmm?”

 “And you’re not allowed, Roman?” Virgil gripped his shoulder. “Look at me, Princey.”

 Roman looked up. Virgil swallowed another growl at the despondent look on the prince’s face. Instead, he gripped Roman’s shoulder tighter.

 “No one,” he said firmly, “is allowed to tell you your logo is bad. You hear me?”

 Roman blinked.

 “I mean it, Roman,” he said, softening his voice a little, “it’s you. It’s yours, no one’s allowed to tell you it’s wrong.”

 “So that’s…okay?”

 “Yeah, Princey, it’s okay.”

 “Oh.” Roman looked back down at his costume. “Okay. Thank you, Virgil.”

 “Anytime.”

 Virgil would come to be astounded at how much he means that.

 Because, really, now that Roman’s talking? Virgil’s fucking shocked that they didn’t realize how much Roman actually has to offer.

 First off, Princey’s smart as hell. Sure, L’s the resident braincell but you can be big of brain and dumb of ass at the same time.

 If Logan tries to tell you he’s not a dumbass sometimes he is wrong.

 Roman can puzzle solve with the best of them. Do you have any idea how much brainpower it takes to write a story? A script? Understand how all those moving parts fit together and make sense as a whole? Virgil sure as hell didn’t. He spent one afternoon trying to help Roman only for it to end up as Roman explaining what he was doing and Virgil frantically trying to keep up. Don’t even get him started on how impressive the Imagination stuff is.

 “It’s my job, Fall Out Brood,” Roman laughs every single time Virgil expresses how fucking cool this is, “have to be good at something.”

 And Roman is. He’s good.

 Second: Patton may be the heart, Logan may be the brains, but no one is as good at reassuring him as Roman. Probably has something to do with the Creativity gig. Roman had asked, politely, if Virgil would be comfortable telling him what to do when he gets really anxious, whether to leave him alone, get him somewhere safe, get him things, what have you. Virgil had told him, bemused, only to be shuttled into somewhere that screamed safewarmcomfortableeverythingisokay the next time he had a panic attack. Roman, with the lack of shame truly becoming of a theatre kid, had no problems cheering him up by loudly declaring he would fight whatever shadowy figures plagued his little nightmare, swatting at the air with his sword until Virgil’s sobs had turned into giggles. He never made Virgil talk about anything if he didn’t want to, didn’t try to sit and work through things if they weren’t ready, and never touched him unless he’d gotten the okay. The first time Virgil told him he’d be fine with receiving hugs in the aftermath was the warmest he’d felt in years.

 Princey gives really good hugs.

 Third: Roman’s fucking funny.

 Remember the whole ‘smart as hell’ thing? Know how Logan’s funny as fuck too when he lets himself be?

 Virgil’s lost count of how many times he’s had to gasp out for Roman to shut the fuck up because his sides hurt too much from laughing. He ends up sprawled across the fucking floor or the couch or Princey’s bed, dying very happily but painfully because Roman won’t stop making him laugh.

 Most of the time it’s due to something they’re watching and Roman’ll notice some detail that he picks apart until they’re both howling or Virgil will make one sarcastic comment that turns into a full fucking bit for like…ten minutes. Roman will just keep riffing off of the smallest thing until he’s laughing too hard to keep going—not very likely—or Virgil will flail out desperately and smack him—much more likely.

 Princey said he makes fun of the things he loves.

 …maybe that’s why he doesn’t make fun of Virgil anymore.

 Virgil curls tighter around the pillow, clutching it to his chest. As he rubs his cheek against it, he grimaces. It’s too rough. It’s not warm enough. It doesn’t smell right.

 They’d been talking. It had been good.

 But that was before.

 Before Roman had cautiously approached Logan with an apology, the offering of a new planner for him, the promise to listen to him, hear him out, give him space to speak. Logan had accepted.

 Before Roman had opened the border between his and Remus’s side of the Imagination, sending a little puppy scuttling over to his brother’s castle with a note, a dagger, and a vial of acid. It returned as a kitten with a beautifully poisonous rose.

 Before Roman had finally, finally, after days of trying, opened the door when Patton knocked, letting him come inside so they could talk, about everything that happened since…well, ever. They hadn’t stopped hugging long enough to walk down the stairs.

 Before Roman had let Janus, Janus, take care of him.

 And now…

 Now Roman didn’t want to be in the same room as him.

 It feels as if they’re walking on eggshells around each other again, Virgil appearing in a room only for Roman to completely disappear, getting up and leaving a conversation entirely just to avoid him, Virgil knocking on Roman’s door only for Roman to shout that he’s busy, not to come inside, Virgil, trying, trying to figure out where Roman’s gone, what’s happened, only to receive the cold shoulder.

 A problem none of the other Sides seemed to be having.

 He clutches the pillow to his chest.

 Did he—did he do something wrong?

 Does Roman—does Roman not like him anymore?

 Maybe he shouldn’t have pushed so hard about talking to the others. Roman needed space, needed time, he didn’t need someone else breathing down his neck. He should’ve let Roman set the pace, listened more, been kinder to him when he needed reassurance.

 Maybe he shouldn’t have made Roman think it was his fault that the others were taking so long, or suggested that if he wanted things to get better he should try talking first. Roman had been taught by everyone else that things were his fault already, Virgil didn’t need to jump on that train too.

 Maybe he should’ve been kinder to Roman, less focused on making the others understand that they hurt Roman. Everyone in the Mindscape knew that Roman was hurt, Virgil should’ve helped fix that, taken care of Roman, not pushed the blame onto everyone else.

 Maybe Roman didn’t like what he had to say about Disney films. They were Roman’s comfort watches, the last thing he needed was for someone to cruelly rip away his enjoyment of one of the few things he could enjoy.

 Maybe Roman didn’t like Virgil’s way of taking care of him. Virgil never pushed, never did Roman the courtesy of asking, like Roman did with him, just assumed he knew best how to comfort someone and left it there. Roman might’ve needed more hugs, more time, less distraction, just something other than what Virgil gave him.

 Maybe Roman didn’t like how much Virgil ended up hoarding him to himself. Not letting him go to the others for comfort, just to work things out. Maybe he thought Virgil was just keeping him upset so he could hang out with him more.

 Or maybe…

 Virgil muffles his sob in the pillow.

 Maybe Roman needed or wanted him anyway.

 Maybe Roman was just waiting until he could get the comfort he actually wanted. Maybe he waited until the others were easier to talk to so he could go back to what he really needed. Maybe Virgil was just a placeholder until Roman could get hugs from Patton and Remus, talk with Logan and Janus, not him. Never him.

 Maybe that’s…okay.

 It’s not, it won’t be fucking okay for a long time, but one day, it will be okay.

 Virgil curses and throttles the pillow in his arms, wishing for it to be real, to be warm, to be a chest of white and gold and a splash of red, for it to wraps its arms around him and say it’s okay, shadow-ling, I’m here, I won’t leave you, shh.

 But it’s just a pillow.

 Has his room always been this cold?

 Have Disney movies always looked this flat?

 Has music always sounded this gray?

 Has Virgil always been this alone?

 He can hear them in the living room below him. He can hear Roman and Logan throwing quips back and forth, can hear Remus tackling his brother into the wall, and Roman protesting. He can hear Janus scolding Remus and checking to make sure Roman’s not injured, can hear Roman wave him off gently and go right back to verbally sparring with Logan. He can hear Patton laughing too hard, falling off the couch and begging the two of them to let up, let him breathe, can hear Roman coo and call him sweet, adorable, in that soft voice he only uses when he’s talking to someone he cares about.

 Can’t hear any of them worrying about where he is.

 Maybe it’s better this way.

 He got greedy, took too much of what was never his to take, what wasn’t given to him freely. He latched onto the first thing he thought was for him and didn’t stop to think that it wasn’t. He may think he’s been included in the famILY but he knows he’s still an outsider.

 He may be Virgil now but deep down he’ll always be Anxiety.

 So here he will stay, in the cold of his room, in the dark of his face smushed into a pillow that will never be real. He will stay and he will be happy.

 But not today.

 He sniffles and smears his nose on the sleeve of his hoodie, not bothering to pull away from the pillow long enough to wipe tears properly. His limbs start to protest as he hugs it tighter, tighter, tighter, but it’s no use. He can feel his own arms through the pillow. There isn’t enough—there’s too much give in the pillow. It’s just a fucking pillow but it’s not enough.

 Another laugh from downstairs and Virgil growls, burying his head in the pillow until he can’t hear himself think.

 Can’t hear anything but his own muffled sobs ringing in his ears.

 Can’t hear anything other than the thought swirling around and around his head that he’ll never be enough, that he’ll never be wanted, that he’ll never be anything other than Anxiety.

 Can’t hear the soft knock at the door.

 “Virgil?”

 The voices in his head must be getting pretty powerful because he’s certain he can hear Roman calling for him. He buries deeper in the pillow.

 “Virgil? Virgil, can you hear me?”

 Yes, he thinks, yes, I can hear you, which means I’m not crying hard enough.

 “Can I come in, shadow-ling?”

 Yes, he thinks, come in and make me forget that you don’t need me anymore.

 He must really be losing it because he thinks he can hear the door open and close again with a soft click, followed by a sharp intake of breath and a soft coo.

 “Oh, shadow-ling,” the imaginary Roman murmurs, “come here, little Stormcloud.”

 Oh, his imagination is being cruel to him right now because the sensation of warm arms around his waist and shoulders fucking burns. He buries his face in the pillow until he can’t tell which way is up anymore, not sure how he’s tricked himself into imagining Roman’s cradling him but too unwilling to let the illusion go.

 “That’s right, Stormcloud, relax for me, I’ve got you, I’m right here, shh, shh, you’re alright,” the imaginary Roman keeps whispering in that cruelly soft voice, “you’re doing great, shadow-ling.”

 Virgil wants him to be real. So bad he aches from it. But he knows he’s not.

 What happens next breaks his fucking heart.

 The imaginary Roman kisses him.

 It’s chaste, a barely-there brush of his lips against his forehead but it tears a whine out of Virgil’s throat before he can stop it. The imaginary Roman hushes him gently, pressing another kiss to the part of his cheek not buried in the pillow and it taunts him with how real it feels. The slightly chapped lips, the warm rush of air as Roman breathes, the light brush of his nose as he pulls away.

 It’s too much.

 It’s too much and he wants it to be real so badly but he knows the instant he pulls away it will vanish and that might just break him.

 Then he realizes the imaginary Roman is talking to him.

 “Breathe, Stormcloud, you’ve got to breathe,” he coaxes, “I know it’s tempting to stay buried in a pillow all day, but you can’t breathe properly like that, sweetheart.”

  No, no, don’t call me sweetheart, I’ll break.

 “Shadow-ling, Stormcloud, my darling,” the imaginary Roman says instead, “come on…”

 Well, now he’s disappointing imaginary Roman too. Figures. He can’t do anything right.

 “Of course you can,” the imaginary Roman pleads, “just breathe for me, shadow-ling, I’m right here, I’ve got you, you can keep your eyes closed if you need to, just breathe.”

 Another whine. Another kiss pressed against his head. The whine grows louder.

 “Shh, shh, my darling,” imaginary Roman murmurs, “breathe, come on, just—trust me, okay? Can I ask that of you, Stormcloud?”

 And goddamnit, this is why Virgil can’t do anything.

 Virgil trusts him.

 So he prepares himself for heartbreak and lifts his head.

 “Thank you, shadow-ling,” imaginary Roman—wait, he’s still here?—murmurs, rubbing his back, “there you go, now just breathe—oh! Oh, come here, lean on me, I’ve got you.”

 Having listed to the side horribly, Virgil lands against a solidwarmsafereal chest and—and—

 “R-Roman?”

 “Yes, my darling,” not imaginary Roman says, still kissing Virgil’s forehead, “I’m here, I’m here.”

 White-hot rage burns Virgil’s tears.

 He lets out a yell and shoves, not caring that it throws them both horribly off-balance, threatening to send him tumbling to the floor. He hears Roman cry out, trying to keep ahold of him, but he scrabbles and gets his hands around the bedpost and pulls.

 “Virgil—Virgil stop, you’re going to hurt yourself—“

 “Why do you care?” The rage coats his tongue. “You fucking left, you—you—you fucking didn’t care about me anymore, you decided you didn’t want me anymore and you fucking left so don’t try and care now!”

 “Virgil—sweetheart, I—“

 “Don’t fucking call me that!” He keeps his eyes squeezed tight. “You didn’t give a fuck about me when you left, when you got your fucking family back, you think—you think you can just waltz back in like you didn’t abandon me?”

 “Virgil—“

 “Because you did, Roman!” Virgil blindly shoves at where the prince was before, knocking him into the wall. “You fucking left me as soon as you got the others back like I—like I never did anything for you and now you—now you can’t even look at me.”

 “I’m looking at you now.”

 Virgil laughs.

 He throws his head back and howls until his chest and throat ache.

 “You didn’t give a shit when the others started talking to you. You just fucking up and abandoned me like you never cared about me in the first place. You replaced me with them or—or abandoned me as your placeholder and I’m fucking hurt, Roman.”

 “I know.”

 “Then why did you do it?”

 Silence.

 Virgil’s heart stops.

 No.

 No, no, no, no—

 He fucked up.

 He fucked up so bad.

 Roman left.

 Roman’s not here anymore.

 Roman left again, he made Roman leave, he—he fucked up so bad, he shouldn’t have yelled, he’s fucked up, he hurt Roman, no, no, no, no—

 On instinct, his hands hook into claws.

 Only to be caught by warmsolidreal hands and brought to something soft.

 “Don’t,” comes Roman’s softsaferealhurt voice, murmuring in his ear as he holds him still, “don’t scratch, sweetheart.”

 “Don’t—“

 “I know, I know,” Roman says immediately, “you said not to call you that. I’m sorry. I’m so, so, sorry.”

 …what?

 “I didn’t realize I was hurting you,” comes the voice again, “that’s no excuse, I know, but please, Virgil, I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to abandon you.”

 Virgil swallows. “What the fuck do you call it then?”

 “I didn’t want to push my luck.”

  What?

 “You were being so good to me, Virgil,” Roman murmurs, oblivious to the internal struggle Virgil’s currently facing, “so kind, so supportive, that I…I realized I wanted to ask more from you. Things I had no business asking. And the longer you kept on being you, the harder it was to resist the urge to push and risk shattering everything you’d let me build with you.”

 “What—“ Virgil swallows— “what the fuck did you want?”

 Roman stills in front of him. With his eyes still shut, he can’t tell what’s going on, but when Roman speaks next his voice is hoarse.

 “Before I ask,” comes the whisper, “I want you to know that you have every right to say no. You can push me away, shove me out of your room, stay angry at me for as long as you want. I’ve hurt you, badly, and I have no right to ask this of you. I want you to know that. That I’m okay with you asserting that right.”

 Fuck, Princey.

 “…what do you want?”

 A pause. Then a soft rush of air, right on his face.

 “May I kiss you, Stormcloud?”

 Oh.

  Oh.

  Oh, no.

 “R-Roman?”

 “That’s it,” Roman murmurs and oh, his mouth is right next to Virgil’s, “that’s what I want, shadow-ling.”

 He shifts a little until Virgil can feel Roman’s warmth.

 “That and everything that goes with it.”

 “Why—why did you leave? I-if that’s what you wanted?”

 “Because that would mean to push,” Roman says immediately, “and the last thing I wanted was to push you away. I thought if I could…rein it in, control it, I could…I wouldn’t hurt you.”

 A soft chuckle.

 “Look how well that turned out.”

 “But the others—“

 “I needed Remus to tell me what was going on,” Roman says wryly, “Janus to point out that I was okay in wanting something, Patton to help me figure it out, and Logan to kick my ass into doing it.”

 “To…to ask me?”

 “Yes, Stormcloud,” comes the whisper, “to ask you.”

 “And if I say yes?”

 He can feel Roman’s lips turn up.

 “…then I’ll kiss you, Stormcloud.”

 “Are you really here?”

 The question bursts out of him before he can stop it, immediately biting his lip in reprimand for letting it.

 “Open your eyes, Virgil,” Roman says softly, “look at me.”

 He shakes his head, not wanting it to be imaginary. Not now, not after this. Roman squeezes his hands.

 “Look at me, Stormcloud,” he whispers, “look at me.”

  Fuck it.

 Roman smiles at him, real and warm and soft and here. He squeezes Virgil’s hands again and takes the smallest step closer.

 “I’m here,” he says, wrapping Virgil’s arms around his neck, “I’m right here, shadow-ling.”

 He’s here.

 This won’t fix everything. But it’s one hell of a start.

 “Ask me again.”

 “May I kiss you, Stormcloud?”

 Virgil shakes his head. “Not like that. Ask me properly.”

 Confusion dances on Roman’s face before realization hits. His smile widens and he brings a hand to Virgil’s head. Virgil clutches Roman tight as he gets dipped into the prince’s arms. Roman leans forward until his mouth almost catches Virgil’s.

 “May I kiss you, sweetheart?”

  “Yes.”

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[aenxiome]

Chapter 3: Suck it up Fenton

The rest of the day ended up being lackluster.

In the beginning, things were going well, seating assignments had been changed, and more teachers roamed the halls during and between classes. Unfortunately, the changes aren't going to last. While teachers were punishing students for bad behavior, it wasn't always the ones who did the deed that got punished. It is almost like the trouble makers started rapidly evolving. Many of the A-List target students got detention, with their reflective bully doing a whole 180 when a teacher showed up. Thankfully I managed not to get detention for a second day and a row, but that may be from Dash getting in trouble earlier today.

I may be giving my classmates more credit than they are worth, though. Before today, none of the teachers ever monitored the events in the hallways—giving everyone free rein to do what they wished without any consequences. This isn't anyone evolving. This is their way of getting around the new, hopefully, standards that they are trying to implement. If things continue to go this way, the A-Lists and others are just going to become less subtle in their actions. Not that I expect them to be able to pull it off in the end, but the new arrangement might cause even more issues.

'Great going Fenton, you just screwed everyone, I tell myself. Not everyone can handle themselves as well as you can. This is going to mean so much trouble. But, I try to look on the bright side, thinking about Astronomy. I got some papers back today, full credit on my star chart, though that's pretty much expected of me at this point. So not too surprising. Hopefully, other classes will improve with the seating arrangements being changed, but there is no way of telling if they truly will.

Once classes were over and done with, I met up Sam and Tucker at the Nasty Burger. The restaurant is just starting to get busy with the constant incoming groups of students coming through the door. Thankfully we can claim our regular booth and put in an order for food. " So, how did your guys' day go?" Tucker asks, fiddling with one of his newer PDAs. He goes through PDAs as Dad goes through fudge, a lot of them and all the time. Sam and I just shrug in response and continue the conversation going through some random small talk.

In the middle of our conversation, Tucker suddenly goes still and stares at the PDA. He shoves the device in front of Sam's face making her read whatever has grabbed his attention. Once she is done looking at whatever it is, she and Tucker make eye contact conveying something to each other that I am unable to make out. Sam starts to say something but is interrupted by our food arriving.

"Danny," Tucker says as I shove fries into my mouth, " what happened last night?" I give him a questioning look. Sam slides over the PDA it is showing a local news article. The headline, "MORE DESTRUCTION IN AMITY," is plastered at the top. Below it shows a picture of a destroyed abandoned lot, the same lot from the fight with Skulker earlier this morning.

MORE DESTRUCTION IN AMITY

by Charisma Lynn

This morning residents of this local neighborhood woke up to the remains of another ghost fight. All around the grounds, traces of the battle can be found. Burn marks cover the ground in many areas showing the intensity of the fight. When officials first got on the scene, they found a couple of abnormalities not commonly seen. In a couple of different places, shattered pieces of ghostly green energy can be found. At first appearance, the pieces look like stained glass, but after the first contact turns into a gooey substance. Residents are being told not to worry as the substance is completely harmless but to still take caution. Along with the glass-like substance is a frozen piece of the ground. Even in the sunlight, the spot has shown no difference and is as hard as a rock. Out of the earth is a broken piece of ice. So far, we are unable to tell where the ice has come from, but our best guess is from some kind of ghostly interference. Many residents of the neighborhood have to ask where Phantom was? Was he part of the destruction, or is there a new ghost in town? Find out more tonight at 6 on APC.

I look up from the article to see Sam and Tucker staring at me. I shove more unsalted fries into my mouth. Did you know salt is a natural ghost repellent I, unfortunately, learned that the hard way. Never again. I finish chewing before reassuring them, " Guys, it's fine it was just a typical ghost fight." Tucker starts on his food apparently satisfied with my answer while Sam looks like she is getting ready to argue, but I interject before she gets the chance.

" It was just Skulker, it wasn't anything too bad" the mixture of "too bad" and Skulker grabs Tucker's attention once again. With him too now giving me a critiquing look over. " Are you sure dude? You aren't hurt anywhere are you?" His voice started to become a little bit frantic as he says, "Because Im not going to the hospital. Sorry but that's where I draw the line."

" Okay, but that doesn't explain what's up with the ice spot and glassy thingy," Sam says, bringing us back to the point of the conversation. " Not now," I tell them. I glance around the crowded room before looking back to them, "not here."

They look as if they are preparing to argue as I whisper, " in private." I get a couple of questioning looks as I continue, " Theres' too many people that could overhear" With the promise to talk about it later, our meal went back to everyday small talk and griping about whatever else is bothering us.

Thankfully they let it go. For now, at least.

We finish up our meal and leave the restaurant, then start on down the road. "So," Sam asks, looking in my direction, " where exactly are we going? Your place?" I start to agree but get cut off by Tucker, " We should go to the lot." I give him a questioning glance. He continues his thought, saying, " The picture in the article doesn't show much, and you never know the media could be over-exaggerating again."

"Why not," Sam says with the tone of excitement in her voice, " sounds like fun." I stop walking as I think it over. Before I can say anything, the two of them rush off ahead in the direction of the lot while a feeling of dread overtakes me. "Guys," I call out to them, trying to catch back up, " I don't think this is a good idea." I tell them in a rush, "I will tell you about it when we get to my place. We don't need to go there." Sam narrows her eyes at me before saying, "you're hiding something."

" No, that's not it," I wring my hands in my shirt, unsure of how to proceed. She doesn't let up with her glare at my words. Sam sighs and comes towards me, grabs my arm, and pulls me along with her. I try to pull myself away without hurting her, but I just can't seem to do it. Finally, I become resigned and hesitantly follow without protest.

Didn't they read the same article that I did? It says authorities looked at the lot. They would have had to call ghost experts. Who is to say that they still aren't there? What are we going to say if the Guys In White stuck around? Or even worse, my parents.

When we arrive, the lot is empty, only showing past signs of anyone having been here. The three of us cautiously walk towards the destruction. Next to me, I hear Tucker gasp before saying, "Oh my…" he stops himself before saying anything else. Sam isn't much better putting her hand around my arm in a vice grip.

Before them stands the evidence of one of my fights. In the daylight, the damage looks worse than it did under the moon, making me feel even worse about our actions than I already do. The ground doesn't look so much burned but scorched. As if a fire had burned away its beauty and left a hot steaming pile of muck in its place.

The few trees that line the property have missing limbs that have either splintered or lie on the ground. Shards of ectoplasm are scattered around in the grass, waiting for an unsuspecting human to fall victim to its goo or a ghost to impale its self on its sharp edges. In the middle of it, all is the spikey ice collum surrounded by the frozen frosty ground.

" So they under exaggerated this time," Tucker said, trying to bring humor to the situation, " who would have guessed." I look away from them, ashamed. " It didn't look this bad at night," I say softly, " It didn't" Unable to meet their eyes, I walk forward towards the Ice. Sam and Tucker tell me not to touch anything that I don't know where it comes from As I get near it. I ignore them and put my hand on the side of the spike. Even in human form, I am still unable to feel any of its coldness. It feels just as warm as the air around us, a little moist but not cold.

Sam and Tucker, at some point, walk towards the spike and join me at my side while I inspect the spike. " What does it feel like to you?" I ask. " Dude, it's Ice, it's cold. What else is it supposed to feel like?" I continue to glide my hand over the ice while telling them to humor me. I watch as they put their hands onto the ice, and as soon as they touch it, their hands go flying away from it. They both hold their hand as if something is attacking them. "Danny, how can you touch that!" Sam exclaims, " that stuff is freezing!"

" It feels warm to me," I tell them nonchalantly as if this is an everyday occurrence. " Danny, this isn't normal," Sam says in a worried tone. I don't say anything in response, knowing that this isn't normal for human beings, not at all. Instead, I stare at the ice, trying to figure out how to fix it, when suddenly, an idea comes to my head. I look towards them and hum to catch their attention, "Hey, do you think you can back up for a second? I have something I want to try."

As soon as they are far away enough, I check and double-check that no one is around. Before going forward on my idea, I yell to Tucker, " Tuck, can you check for cameras and stuff first?" He pulls out his PDA and tells me, " No problem with 'Simone' I'll know if anything is there in a jiffy." I wait a second until I hear him give the okay and start my attempt.

My eyes start to glow an icy ethereal blue as I stand before the spike and tap into my ice core. I can feel the cold rushing through me and out to my surroundings. In my presence, the spike starts to repair itself as I let my core come to the surface. In the middle of the spike, I can feel a connection to myself, its ectoplasmic connection to myself. Instead of pushing the ice out, I pull it in, and before my eyes, the ice starts to melt. Instead of shattering like before, it slowly becomes raw energy becoming a blue-white blob.

I gather as much energy as I can from the earth, defrosting it and adding it to the rest of the blob. I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding when all of the ice finished melting. I look around the lot for the scorched places, instinctively knowing what to do. I melt the icy ectoplasmic blob even more into water and send it around to saturate the ruined earth. When the ecto-water hits the ground, the earth lets out a satisfying hiss. The ground looks as if it has partially recovered, making it look like months have gone by instead of only a few hours since the initial conflict. Slowly I let go of my core, letting my eyes go back to their normal human hue. A smile comes to my face at my accomplishment, and I look over at Sam and Tucker. They are both staring at me with huge eyes with different emotions flashing through them: amazement, surprise, and wonder.

I go to take a step towards them when the world starts to spin. I feel myself stumble forward. " Danny!" I hear my name called out in fear and a rushing of feet coming to me. A wave of nausea hits me hard, and I lose my balance falling forward. Luckily Sam is just close enough for me to fall onto. "Danny," I hear my name called out again, " oh my gosh, are you okay?" Feeling too weak to answer, all I can do is groan.

" What are we going to do?" I hear Tucker ask Sam frantically, " we can make it to his place from here, and both of our houses are on the other side of town." The two of them keep coming up with ideas that won't work to get us out of the lot. I try to interject but just moving my mouth causes me pain.

Finally, I manage to groan out a name, "Jazz," but they don't seem to hear me. I try again, a bit louder this time, "Jazz," Sam stops talking, and when Tucker doesn't, I listen to her hit him in the back of the head. "Hey, what was that for" he complains, "Shush, Danny said something." With the raging quiet for the last time, I groan, "Jazz."

A quick vague phone call later and give or take a few minutes, Jazzs' car pulls up, and they give a sigh of relief. I hear a door slam and a worried Jazz making her way over. When she gets to us, I try to look up at her and grab her attention, but I am unable to reach her eyes. " What happened" She interrogated as she crouches down to take hold of me. I feel fatigued and start to lose track of the conversation. The next thing I know, someone has picked me up, and I'm in the car. I feel at ease with the motion of the car as we race home. It doesn't take long for me to close my eyes and fall asleep.

When I come to, I'm staring at the old stick-on stars that are attached to my bedroom ceiling. I cautiously sit up, feeling the strain of an invisible muscle, my core, in my chest. My sister and friends are spread out in the room, passed out exhausted. I glance at the clock next to my bed and read the time 3:18 AM. I try to get up from the bed, but I tumble down onto the floor. The sound wakes up Jazz, making her spring into action, helping me back up. "Hey," she whispers, "don't move too fast. You are still recovering."

I wince a little at the movement. Once she gets me steady, I whisper, "Can you help me get to the bathroom." She nods and carefully helps me to the bathroom. Once everything is situated, Jazz brings me back to my room and helps me onto the bed. I scoot over, making enough room for her to join me, which she quickly accepts.

"They told me what happened at the lot," she says, motioning towards my friends, " What were you thinking trying something like that?" She admonishes. I snuggle into her, getting comfortable before starting my defense, " I was just trying to clean up the mess we make," With a look, I explain further, " Skulker and I fought there last night. It went a little longer than expected. I didn't realize that we made such a mess."

"What about the ice," she inquires. I give half a shrug, " It was unexpected; I don't know how it happened." I tell her truthfully, " I plan to go visit Frostbite this weekend and see if he knows anything." She starts raking her hand through my hair then continues the conversation, " They said you got rid of the ice and fixed part of the ground? They didn't explain it too well. Care to elaborate?"

"It's weird. I just kind of knew how to do it. It was like…." I trail off, not liking the word I need to use. Jazz, unfortunately, knew where to pick up at, "Instinct?" She questions, with my silence being the only acknowledgment she needs. She sighs before saying, "It's okay, you know, to admit it." We lay there for a while before I decide to respond, " I can't." I react in denial, " If I acknowledge it, then it makes it true." Jazz lets out a breathy laugh at that, " So, what if you don't talk about it? It's going to go away?"

" I wish," I mumble, "It's just if I talk about it, then it becomes more real. I can pretend to be normal." She scoffs at my response, " Normal is overrated anyway." I let out a yawn and looked over at the time 4:03 AM. " Can we talk about this later? It's late." She lets out a yawn of her own, having caught mine before saying accusingly, " You just don't want to talk about it." I don't deny her accusation but put some more distance between the two of us and painfully turn over.

What does she want me to tell her? That I feel drawn to go to Ghost Zone? That I like laying around in my ghost form? I can get away with feeling like me under the stars and use insomnia as an excuse, but there is no way to explain anything else. If I told her some of these things, it would just be more of a confirmation of what I already know: I'm a freak.

" Good night, Jazz."

"Good night, little brother."

[thenamesseven]

Pairing: Jongho x reader

Genre: Romance, angst, jail au!

Warnings: Angst, a lot of angst and mentions of blood.

Word count: 4.3

A/N: IM FINALLY BAAAACK! My internship is over and I finally had the time to finish writing this chapter! Sorry for taking so long, I promise I’ll be around for more often now! ^^ Enjoy this chapter!

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Blood. 

When Wooyoung opened the infirmary door and watched the scene in front of him, his surroundings started spinning around at a fast pace. The male gripped the door handle tightly, breathing shortening to avoid smelling the metallic scent that filled up the room.

There was blood everywhere on the floor. It would be impossible to get to him without stepping into the sticky bloody puddles that were forming around his body.

Wooyoung had seen all kinds of things while working in a jail. Fights, attempts of murder, suicides, death wasn't a stranger for him. This time however, there was something different about the situation he just encountered. The one laying on the floor might be a criminal, Mingi's hands were stained with blood, with theft but under all that, behind all the things he did, a good person hid. Wooyoung knew Mingi wasn’t bad, life just brought him to this place but he would have surely made better choices in his life if he had the chance to in the past. 

Time slowed down when reached for his walkie-talkie, panick was blocking all of his senses like he couldn't even hear himself as he called for help and medical assistance. Wooyoung rushed to the inmate's side, almost falling down onto the floor when his shoes stepped on the blood that surrounded Mingi's body, the red liquid made the surface slippery and Wooyoung would have to be careful if he didn't want to make the situation even worse by hurting himself too.

"Mingi?" His voice was rushed, tense and shook with hesitance as he reached out to shake his body "Mingi'' Wooyoung's voice turned stern, trying to see if a stricter voice would bring him back to consciousness. "Mingi'' He tried again, kneeling down onto the floor, staining his uniform pants with blood as he reached out to gently slap his face. 

He needed a reaction. Anything. 

Desperate to get any sign of life from him, Wooyoung's eyes scanned the inmate's body, quickly finding where the open wound that was covered by blood and stained clothes was. It was near his stomach, more on the side, the amount of blood looked bad but he knew Mingi would survive if the knife hadn't touched any vital organs. His hands flew to the wound, pressing as hard as he could in order to stop the bleeding. 

Mingi groaned loudly in response, probably in pain due to the sudden pressure on his side and Wooyoung felt as if the heaviest weight had been lifted from his shoulders. 

There was still some life in him, everything wasn’t lost yet.

Despite Mingi not enjoying the sensation of Wooyoung’s hands pressuring his side, the male kept doing it as hard as he could, ignoring the awful sensation of his hands becoming wet and sticky with another man’s blood. He was not good at this, if it hadn’t been a life or death situation he would have probably passed out already, Wooyoung was never a fan of blood.

“Mingi stay with me” He muttered looking down at the inmate, watching how the slightly older male struggled to keep his eyes open, his vision becoming blurry as he didn’t even know who was the one hurting him “Don’t fall asleep alright?  You have to stay awake” 

“Jaehyun…” He whispered, ignoring everything Wooyoung was saying. If he was going to die the last thing he was going to do was drag that fucker down with him. He probably wouldn’t pay the consequences, Jaehyun had made sure to get along with the high ranks of this jail but he would try at least, he just had to.

“I know it was Jaehyun, I know” Wooyoung looked at the door when more guards stumbled inside, instantly stopping as soon as they saw the scene in front of their eyes. One of them ran out and the sound of his gagging as he threw out echoed in the busy hall loud enough for the people in the infirmary to hear.

“Mingi” Wooyoung gently slapped his face when he saw him closing his eyes, his body temperature was unbelievably low and his muscles were too relaxed for Wooyoung’s liking “Mingi stay awake, the ambulance is coming” 

“Jongho…” 

Wooyoung shook his head, motioning for Mingi to shut up and save his energy in order to stay conscious “He’ll visit you later, stay with me Mingi, safe your strength”

“Take care of him” He insisted, not listening to Wooyoung “Don’t let him get in trouble, no matter how stubborn he is” 

“Mingi-”

“I know you don’t hate him that much” The smile of Mingi’s face caught Wooyoung so off guard, that he opened and closed his mouth like a breathless fish, not knowing what to do or say to his most recent words “I know you’ll help him, I know you’ll get him out”

After saying those words, Mingi lost consciousness. Wooyoung knew it because his eyes closed and his muscles relaxed so much that Wooyoung started panicking. “Mingi” Wooyoung repeated his name, gently shaking him in order to wake him up “Mingi?” His tone, more urgent than before, alarmed the cops outside that were waiting for the ambulance and paramedics to arrive “Mingi!” 

But Mingi couldn’t hear him anymore.

Hospitals are commonly disliked by people. It was a word that brings bad memories to people, a synonym for death and illness which is why most humans try to avoid this place. This is totally understandable though, you don’t come to a hospital to have some fun. Sure sometimes happiness filled the rooms due to recovery or births but that feeling usually got drowned by the sadness and desperation that filled the rest of the patients around.

You’ve always wanted to work in a hospital though, the idea of taking care of people, watching them recover and helping them through their illness always got your attention. You’ve been the kind of person that put others before yourself, Jongho usually scolded you about this but it was your nature, you just couldn’t help it. 

Today was different though. 

Today you hated this place as much as a normal human being did.

You rushed out of the taxi that drove you here from your apartment as soon as the driver stopped in front of the entrance. Placing some money -that would surely be more than enough- into his hand, you grabbed your purse and closed the door, half walking, half running to your destination. Pushing the double doors open, a wave of sickness and nausea hit you hard as soon as the characteristic smell of antiseptic mixed with medicine filled your nose, you ignored it though, as well as the serious yet worried glance the woman at the front desk threw your way. The brightness that only became stronger by the white walls and floor surrounding you made your head spin but you somehow managed to keep walking forward, taking step after step closer to where Wooyoung had told you they were waiting.

All kinds of thoughts ran through your mind.

You should have been there with him, you should have been there to stop it cause Jaehyun wouldn’t have acted the way he did if you had been there with Mingi, you shouldn’t have left him alone, this would have never happened if you had been there instead of hiding at home like a coward. Blaming yourself wasn’t new, you’ve always had a tendency of being a bit too hard on yourself when something happened, Jongho knew this better than everybody but this time he wasn’t around to silence the mean voice that whispered in your ear, that haunted your mind.

Standing there in the waiting room were Wooyoung along with Hongjoong, Yunho and San, who sat nearby the doors that led into the different operating rooms. You were the only ones there though, hopefully Mingi was getting as much help as the doctors could provide right now. Wooyoung stood in the middle of the room, arms crossed on his chest, tension evident in his body. He was still covered in blood and the sight of him made you gasp so loud that they all turned their heads towards you curiously, worried. Pain and distress obvious in their features.

This is all your fault.

“(Y/N)” 

Before you could say something, Wooyoung opened his arms and welcomed you into them, wrapping them around your fragile body gently and comfortably, soothing the pain and heaviness in your chest for a few seconds. The blood was dried in his uniform so it didn’t stain your clothes but the metallic yet disgusting scent surrounding him didn’t let it go unnoticed.

“What happened?” You asked quietly, still with his arms around you “How is he?”

“By the time I got to the infirmary to check on him he was already on the floor” Wooyoung explained quietly, running his hand up and down your back “He was conscious so I tried to keep him awake, try to stop the hemorrhage but there was too much blood and he stopped talking and-”

“What I can’t understand is how things like this can happen in a place where inmates should be watched throughout the whole day?” San’s hard yet cold voice brought silence to the room, you dragged your eyes towards them, acknowledging their presence for the first time since you got here.

The three of them looked miserable.

Wooyoung let you go and turned around to face them. He was tense but you knew him well enough to know he would attempt to stay calm in order to not let the situation get out of hand. “Some of them manage to find the right times to get away from us and-”

“So you admit you guys are not doing your job well?” Yunho joined his friend, glaring at Wooyoung as he crossed his arms on his chest. Hongjoong limited himself to look down at something that was displayed on the screen of his phone. Probably business? Whatever it was seemed to be important.

“I mean, that wasn’t even the place I was watching” Wooyoung replied hesitantly, not liking the accusations that were suddenly being thrown his way.

“Guys-” You tried to stop the upcoming argument, to help them relax a little but San glared at you, shutting you up immediately.

“Why were you going to the infirmary then?” He asked, curiously looking at him. “Were you involved in what happened?” He pressed further, willing to pressure him even more.

“What are you trying to say?” Wooyoung stepped forward, hating how they were trying to blame him for what had happened while he had only wanted to save their friend.

Yunho stood up and took a step closer to Wooyoung, taking the same threatening stance Wooyoung had and before you could get in between them, Hongjoong that had stayed quiet during the entire exchange and who you thought wasn’t paying attention to any of the words that were being said finally looked up.

“This is not the place nor time to discuss this” He said, seriousness evident in his face as he looked between Wooyoung and Yunho. None of the males moved, still staring into each other’s eyes right before their leader spoke up again. “Officer Jung did as much as he could Yunho, now we just have to trust Mingi”

“He better get out of this one alive” San scoffed besides him as Yunho sat back down, your blood freezing when you saw how much hatred, how much pain shone in the male’s eyes “Because I’ll make all of their lives a living nightmare if he dies” 

“He will” You whispered quietly, rubbing your eyes as Wooyoung sighed taking a seat besides you “He will get out of this one”

The room Wooyoung had guided you into was similar to the ones you’ve seen in movies before, it felt as if you were about to get interrogated by someone, that wasn’t the case though and unfortunately, you were just waiting to deliver some news. Something you couldn’t believe yet.

The ticking of the clock was the only thing that could be heard as it echoed in the empty room, your fingers nervously fidgeting with the hem of your hoodie as you stared down at the table, nervously waiting for Wooyoung to arrive. The tissues filling your pockets were starting to break into small pieces from how much you’ve been fidgeting with them and your swollen eyes burned from all the tears you’ve shed during the last few hours. Your nose was surely as red as Rudolph’s but that was not the thing the worried you the most.

Your current biggest worry opened the door and snapped you out of your thoughts, his eyes full of concern landing on your face as soon as he entered the room.

“Twenty minutes” Wooyoung said from behind Jongho, eyes on you to make sure you wouldn’t surpass the time limit he was putting on your little reunion “That’s all you got”

“Thanks Wooyoung” You whispered quietly, not trusting your voice too much. Wooyoung just threw 

a small smile your way, eyes scanning your face briefly before he closed the door behind Jongho, going to wherever he would have to go to make sure nobody else would notice Jongho wasn’t in his cell at this time of the night.

You were sure he had heard what happened, news flew fast in this kind of place but you still wanted to be the one to tell him, you wanted to be there for him even if that meant seeing him break for the first time in all the years the two of you had been together.

He deserves to be told by you that Mingi was dead, that he wasn’t coming back anymore.

Jongho still stood by the door, ignoring the empty chair that was placed on the other side of the table waiting for him to take a seat. His hands were in his pockets, eyes down on the floor as he moved his weight from one of his legs to the other, not even knowing how to stand.

Letting out a shaky sigh, you gathered as much strength as you could and stood up, feeling his eyes on you while you walked around the room, picked up the empty chair and placed it down in front of the one you’ve been sitting on all this time. Jongho needed to be closer, he would need you to comfort him as soon as you confirmed the awful thoughts running through his head right now.

“Sit down” You told him, motioning to the chair you’ve just moved.

Jongho looked up at you, making your eyes meet. Time stopped between the two of you, the broken glance in his eyes broke your heart even more and you knew that even though the words hadn’t left your mouth yet he still knew what you were about to say. He wasn’t stupid after all and if Mingi had recovered from the attack he suffered in the infirmary the two of you wouldn’t be here, looking at each other, beating around the bush since none of you wanted to say it out loud.

“Listen to me” Jongho was the first one to break the silence, sadness dripping from his tone as he reached out to grab one of your hands, holding it gently.

“Jongho wait” You cut him off before he could keep talking, the sound of his voice giving you the little push you needed to start talking about what you planned to said “I need to tell-”

“I know” He nodded, eyes staring into yours as his grip on your hand got tighter. There were tears pooling in the corners of his eyes, pain written all over of his face but like always, Jongho kept his mask up and acted as if he was feeling nothing, as if this was just one of his usual days “I know (Y/N) and you need to listen to me”

“But-” Just thinking about Mingi being gone brought a thousand tears to roll down your cheeks, your hands shaking as he gently pulled you against his chest. It was unbelievable how you had come with the intentions of comforting him but it ended up him being the one comforting you. Jongho’s pain was surely stronger than yours, Mingi had been there for him when you couldn’t, he had been the one that kept him safe in this hell and now that was gone.

“I’ll cry his loss when this is over, when we’re safe and sound” He said gently, one of his hands caressing the back of your head while the other kept you close to his body. “You need to listen to me attentively, alright?” Jongho moved back enough to look into your eyes, both of his hands cupping your cheeks now so you could only look at him, not allowing you to look away. “Things are getting really bad for me” He said honestly, wiping your endless tears with his thumbs as they fell “Jaehyun is coming for me (Y/N) and let’s be honest, he has more friends than I do in here” Everything Jongho was saying made perfect sense, Jaehyun’s freedom was getting out of control and he could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted unlike Jongho. That scared you to death, his next target would be Jongho for sure and the thought of losing him like you lost Mingi only increased the pain in your chest.

“I’ll get you out of here” You said almost immediately, heart pounding against your chest “I’ll talk with Hongjoong and we’ll speed up the process and-”

“(Y/N)” Jongho’s voice lowered, his hands squeezing your cheeks a bit tighter to get your attention “I know you will baby, I know you want to get me out of here” The small smile on his lips broke your heart, something told you he was saying goodbye to you, that there were plans in his head that wouldn’t end the way you wanted to.

“You can’t leave me” You begged, shaking your head.

“I never will Treasure, I will never leave you” Jongho’s voice trembled and the alarms in your head rang louder “Listen to me alright? Just listen to me and you can say whatever you want when I’m done” Taking a deep breath you nodded, stomach twisting nervously, anticipation killing you “Something might happen to me, we both know that (Y/N), there’s nothing Jaehyun wants more than killing me” Your lower lip trembled when you nodded at his words, you also knew that and you hated yourself for not being able to do something against it “I’ll obviously try to avoid that though, it’s not like I’m going to wait for him to attack” His smile was full of sadness and he looked at you desperate, helpless “But if something happens-” 

“No”

“If something happens” He repeated caressing your cheeks, one of his hands leaving your face to move into one of his pockets. His hand shook with emotion and nervousness “I want to do this if, unfortunately, I don’t have the chance to in the future” Before you could process what was going on, Jongho went down on one of his knees right in front of you, looking up at you with a look of love and adoration you’ve never seen in his eyes before. His mask was coming down, he wasn’t hiding his emotions from you anymore.

“Jongho-”

“I know you’ve imagined this way differently” He said with a small smile, tears still present in his eyes as he reached up and grabbed one of your hands “Because I was there when you talked for hours about how you’ve always wanted your wedding to be” Your heart was beating so fast at this point that it wouldn’t surprise you if it suddenly broke your ribcage and got through it “And definitely getting proposed to in a jail was never your number one idea but this is what I’ve got, I’m tired of waiting and I’m not taking the risk of losing my last chance” Jongho squeezed your hand tightly, a tear slipping from his eyes “Treasure, (Y/N), I’ve been in love with you since the day I met you” His confession squeezed your heart, you’ve always known Jongho and you had feelings for each other but hearing him say it hit you way differently “It’s surely not a surprise because let’s be honest, I’ve always made sure you knew you were and still are the most important thing in my life” His touch got gentler and his eyes softer, he couldn’t believe he was finally doing this “And if I get out of here, I promise I will give you the world baby, I’ll give you everything you’ve ever wanted, we’ll have that wedding, you’ll have that house you’ve dreamed of and I’ll hopefully help you create the most beautiful family in the entire universe” You bit down on your lower lip, seeing how more tears started rolling down his cheeks “But if something happens, I don’t want to….To die regretting not doing this, regretting not making you mine” He suddenly stood up, pulling you closer to him, resting his forehead against yours.

“I’ve always been yours” You whispered quietly, letting your tears mix with his as they fell down your faces

“Marry me (Y/N)” It wasn’t a question, it wasn’t a proposal, he was begging you to do it, dying for you to accept him not as your best friend or as your lover but as your husband. Jongho wanted to be your other half, the person you would spend the rest of your days with, the one you would die for if it came to that “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me, the reason I’m still alive fighting against all chances, the fuel that keeps my heart beating” He was whispering these words, voice shaky as if he was scared to say this too loud. Jongho has never been good when it came to feelings but he was opening himself up for you and only you tonight. “Be mine forever, you’ve already stolen my heart….Why not steal my last name as well?”

His last sentence made the both of you smile quietly, this cheesy side of him would have been truly funny if you weren’t in the situation you were in right now. He was asking you to marry him but deep down, it still felt as if he was saying goodbye to you.

“On one condition” You cleared your throat and looked at him, serious as ever “You have to get your ass out of here” You said holding back your tears, hearing your own voice breaking almost a thousand times during the same sentence “And prepare with me the wedding of our dreams” His smile got bigger, his head automatically nodding at your words “And you’ll have to wear a tuxedo” He hated them, Jongho always complained of how uncomfortable they looked but you knew he would look incredibly handsome in one of them.

“I’ll do whatever it takes to see you walking down the aisle” He whispered, staring down at your lips, his hands holding one of yours as he slid a ring down your finger, the cold metal turning your skin into goosebumps “I know it’s ugly as fuck but it’s what I’ve found around, I’ll get you the prettiest ring ever when we get out of here” The two of you laughed softly as you looked down at the bland stripe of silver metal around your finger. 

“I love it” You mumbled happily, making him laugh a bit louder this time.

“You do huh? Choi (Y/N)?” The sound of your name along with his last name made your hearts simultaneously skip a beat, both of your smiles getting undeniably bigger as you looked into each other’s eyes. “So tell me”His lips brushed against yours temptingly, hungry for kisses. “Will you marry me? I swear I’ll wear a tuxedo” You giggled against his lips, nodding quietly at his words.

“Yes Jongho, I’ll marry you”

Outside in the parking lot, Wooyoung leaned back against a black car, cigarette between his lips as he breathed in the smoke that released some of the stress in his body.

“Thanks for the help today, we wouldn’t have been able to do it without you” Wooyoung shrugged at the words. Keeping his eyes up on the moon that shone above them.

“I just did the right thing, it was time for me to finally do something” He replied, kicking a stone near his shoe, watching it get lost in the darkness that surrounded the parking lot.

“You’ve been doing the right thing for a long time Wooyoung, without you, who would have watched Jongho’s back all these years?”

“I won’t feel like we succeeded until all of this is over” He simply replied, pushing himself away from the side of the car as he stepped on the cigarette he just threw down onto the floor.

“We’ll get him out of there alive, just hold on there a little longer” 

“I think we’re running out of time” He turned around to look at the male, eyes serious and voice tense. Things were getting too complicated, the plan wasn’t going how it was supposed to. Getting Jongho out of jail wouldn’t be as easy as they thought it would be.

“Have I ever lied to you?” The other asked him, smiling a little when Wooyoung shook his head “Trust us, Jongho and (Y/N) will be out of here as soon as possible” 

“Better hurry up though” Wooyoung insisted, not afraid to pressure the other male “It will be better if you guys get them out of here alive rather than Jaehyun getting them out of here in plastic bags”

“Patience is the key to success” A sigh was heard, the engine of his car revving alive since it was his time to go. He had things to do, plans to discuss with the rest of his friends. “Pleasure working with you officer Jung”

“As long as you keep (Y/N) safe, the pleasure was all mine Hongjoong”

Taglist: @guess--monster @cometoceantrenches @miatsubaki23 @lovelyvitamin @heroesfan101 @daintysan @t-tbinnie @shyshybabyy @little-precious-baby @bebetiny @mirror-juliet @btrombley13 @yukine-smx @wavetease

[sheepfulsheepyardinspace]

Do you have any Star Wars fanfic recommendations, or have a link to someone else's list? I really wanna veg out.

oh my god, DO I. this may have been the best ask in the world. i’m not really sure what u want a feel for, so i threw together some of my favorite longfics for maximum veg time from the ot/pt and links for swr and swtcw recs. they’re pretty much all luke-anakin/vader centric, since that’s kinda my bread and butter.

let’s start with frodogenic, who wrote the first longfic i ever read in sw and might be one of the funniest authors ever. they once reviewed my fanfic & i nearly cried from joy. anyway. 

The Father, 284k+, complete. “Ten years after ROTS, tormenting nightmares of his unborn child drive Darth Vader to extraordinary measures with unexpectedly drastic consequences. Clearly, experience has taught Darth Vader nothing...” 

this is my og star wars fic and boy oh boy is it amazing. i will never get over this. i don’t want to spoil anything but when i say the final chapters are great? i mean they’re legendary. sometimes i still think about them & wish upon a star that i could be such a great writer. vader’s amazing, han is spectacular, and the ocs are fantastic.

Far More Than Rubies, 70k+, complete. “Nine years after AOTC, tragedy revisits the Lars Homestead. Little Luke Skywalker is suddenly plunged into chaos as the rebel movements discover a secret military project that may make a crucial difference in the war with the Empire.”

the spiritual twin of The Father, FMTR takes a look at padmé’s character and relationship with both luke and anakin/vader that’s hard to beat. it’s darker and heavier than The Father, but it hits those same sweet, sweet emotional beats while raising the age-old question: if padmé had lived, what would she have done?

The Family Tree, 12k, complete. “In which Luke Skywalker is stranded in a tree waiting for a flash flood to recede. Too bad he's got company...”

okay, i admit, this isn’t a longfic, but it is a longshot, and it’s amazing. the imagery and description always blow me away, and the interaction (canon-compliant) between luke and vader just [chef’s kiss] get me. vader’s in full, glorious form, and it makes it all the harder when luke wrestles with the knowledge that vader is his father.

Sibling Revelry, 25k, complete. “After Bespin and before Endor, Darth Vader is shocked to discover that Luke and Leia are twins. He's even more shocked when Imperial Intelligence reports that Organa and Skywalker are, erm, a tad closer than previously suspected.”

this is complete crack and humor in the best way possible. it’s crack treated entirely seriously, and you will be in stitches, i promise. no matter how many times i’ve read this i break down.

KittandChips (@kittandchips) writes what i can only describe as food for the soul. the luke-vader interaction is insanely amazing, the world building of daily imperial life and imperial governance is amazing, and vader just has a special je ne sais quoi that u must read to understand––tragic, funny, and so, so fatherly. they’re currently rewriting the Force Bond Series to fit in with newer canon, so i will joyously binge reread the entire again (including the new Force Bond: Mustafar Weekend).

Force Bond 1: Orphan, 47k, complete. “After Owen and Beru are killed by a mysterious stranger, young Luke ends up as an orphan on Coruscant. It's a race against time as Obi-Wan struggles to find Luke before Vader realizes the boy is his son.”

Orphan kicks off the series, which tracks vader and luke’s relationship through the perils of luke’s teenagerhood while growing up under the eye of the emperor and imperial court. it’s filled with slow growth, struggle and misunderstandings as darth vader tries to single parent, and pay off in every installment. the entire series clocks in around 777k+ and is the most joyful, fulfilling reading you’ll ever have. promise.

darth-nickels (@darth--nickels) writes darker, twistier, and terribly, terribly heartwrenching aus. they’ve got a whole host, but let me introduce to my two favorites. also, check out their faux-academia on vader. it’s amazing and i love it, but i admit i am an academia hoe.

Dooku Captured, Pt 2, 16k, complete. “Dooku is taken alive onboard the Invisible Hand, and Sidious' web is torn. The Sith Lord wonders if death might have been preferable to clumsy interrogation by Anakin Skywalker.”

Dooku Captured is a longshot au told from Dooku’s pov which takes the beginning of ROTS and throws it on its head. it’s a fascinating outside perspective of anakin and obi-wan’s relationship and such and interesting examination of dooku’s psyche and especially his complex relationship with the jedi order, qui-gon, yoda, and palpatine. i cannot rec this one enough.

Black Mirror, 90k, incomplete. “The Ghost crew returns to the Lothal when they hear the Empire is investigating the Jedi Temple there. They learn Vader is alone and decide to take him out-- but what they find could change the course of Galactic history.”

Black Mirror diverges into swr territory, but make no mistake: this is entirely an examination of vader and, later, obi-wan as well as ahsoka. luke makes his appearance later in the game, and boy oh boy will you love luke’s portrayal is a microcosm of luke and vader’s relationship within canon. heed the tags, though.

jerseydevious ( @jerseydevious ) is, first and foremost, one of my favorite people on earth. secondly, though, she’s an amazing writer with a deep understanding of vader’s character and psyche, a flair for beautiful depictions, and the true ability to wring every emotion out of your body.

Two and a Half Men (with a baby), 13k, incomplete. “After a long day of bargaining with Hutts and attempting to ignore his past, Darth Vader is nearing the end of his rope. When he discovers his two-year-old son, it's the straw that breaks the semi-rational Sith Lord's back; in a rash act worthy of the Skywalker name, he scoops his son into his arms, steals a shuttle from his own fleet, and punches in random hyperspace coordinates to a destination on the other side of the galaxy. Unfortunately, father and son are not the only ones on the ship.”

Two and a Half Men will stick with you, dude. like no other. i promise. it’s a whirlwind ride with obi-wan, vader, and piett and as funny as it is heartbreaking. it touches on some heavy issues and doesn’t shy away from looking at the damage done to vader––again, heed the tags.

Helioseismology, 4k, complete. “Luke gets shot down on a supply run and caught in an ice storm. It's extremely lucky that his father followed him there.“

i’ll admit. im completely biased about this one because it was a birthday gift to me and i am sucker for litcherally anything when jd puts pen to paper, but believe me when i say you will be awed by the depth and tangled relationships between these luke and vader that jersey can illustrate in a stroke of the paintbrush. im love. always.

izzythehutt ( @izzythehutt ) i am blown away by the intricate dialogue and characterization, always. and the latin puns? im sold. im also a sucker for latin puns, but that’s a story for a different time.

In Loco Pirates, 34k, complete. “A down-on-his-luck Hondo Ohnaka manages to capture the unicorn of all bounties--Luke Skywalker, which sends Darth Vader, Lord of the Sith, on a painfully familiar trip to the planet Florrum to collect his prize. The failed negotiations leave Vader in the awkward position of being stuck in a besieged pirate bunker, trying to balance keeping his wayward child safe (and in his custody) with controlling the tongue of a loose-lipped pirate who--to the surprise of no one--has a bad habit of telling 'amusing' anecdotes from the Clone Wars.”

hondo, aka the best character of swtcw, is brought to life just as vividly on paper as on screen. his entire personality brings luke and vader’s difficulties in a sort of incredulous light, which makes it as funny as it is vulnerable and tragic. the sequel, Palpatine Ad Portas, brings piett into the spotlight, and oh man do his interactions with palpatine and vader bring u all the uncomfortable vibes. relish in it.

sparklight ( @littlesparklight ) man. lemme introduce u to an amazing prolific and detailed writer. i will never get over the series they’ve written & neither will u.

Where Our Intrepid Hero Doesn’t Get Away, 122k, incomplete. “One-shots surrounding either AU situations of canon/legends works where Luke would normally have gotten away (or Vader is simply inserted into the action to come pick his child up) but in these instances doesn't, or completely new scenarios of the same. There are no deep ruminations on consequences of the situations here, just our awful Sith dad picking his son up when he'd rather not be.”

exactly what it says on the tin. u know those glorious moments of fanfic where luke’s gotten captured and ur on pins and needles, waiting for vader to show up in a moment of dark glory? here’s the moment. here’s all the moments.

Space Race, 122k, incomplete. “Owen gives in to Luke's wish to attend the Imperial Academy and Obi-Wan is too late to avert it, though he's not too late to make sure Luke leaves Arkanis before Vader can gets his hands on him. Luke spends over a month running around the galaxy before his father gets him, and from there...”

this story relishes in chase and boy is it fun. it will keep you on the edge of your seat and it’s an amazing ride.

The Suns of Tatooine, 85k, complete. “Luke ends up on a moon swamped in dark side energy after a mission goes wrong, then his father appears... and then they go on a bit of a learning experience. This could've been the only thing that would come of getting through a Sith complex with his father, but thanks to going to free Han earlier than the gang did otherwise, more revelations are had. Will that change anything?”

this series is a thoughtful, contemplative piece examining the nature of the force and the relationship the skywalkers have with tatooine. the descriptions are beautiful, the inventiveness is amazing, and you’ll be thinking about it for long afterwards.

an additional few…

Between Flight and Longing; 34k, complete. “Luke Skywalker and Han Solo journey to the planet Balen'ar on a desperate mission and find more than they'd bargained for.”

a classic and it is for a reason. the interaction between han, luke, and vader is so spectacular and the slow trudge of going through the forest with your greatest enemy and best friend is something hilarious. the end is bittersweet and fantastic.

The Sith Who Brought Life Day, 13k, complete. “An Imperial officer loses a bet and has to get Darth Vader a present for Life Day.”

somewhere between terrifying and dull, this fic presents a canon-compliant look at the hunt for luke and the grinding wheels of the empire. the oc is amazing and it echoes in true star wars spirit: sometimes it’s just some dude who can change the galaxy.

Quintessence, 5k, complete. ‘“Well, Master, I think I’ve found the one positive aspect of this situation.” “Which is?” “The Temple won’t have to pay the costs for our funeral pyres.”’

pure hilarity and shenanigans abound in pre-aotc obi-wan and anakin hijink goodness. lemme tell u––u will deeply sympathize with mace windu afterwards. additionally, check out the rest of the author’s oneshots! they’re deeply thoughtful and the interactions the author writes between obi-wan and anakin are always gold.

some extras & shameless self-promotion

here’s a full list of recommendations for star wars rebels fanfic in case this is what you’re looking for (remember when this used to be a swr blog, lmao)

i’ve also written sw fanfic, both swr and luke-vader centric. drop by and tell me if it’s any good!

[springsaladgaming]

i love the demo up to now but im getting very mind blind vibes from this (mysterious traumatizing childhood event which tore your family apart, determinable relationship with your brother, unapprochable older RO (ansel and ambrose), cold edgy RO where you have to be kinda rude to get their attention (teagan vs k), and just like, general vibes) and like this isn't a bad thing but i think it's important to keep in mind and make sure your story has its own remarkable distinguishing features

This story is loosely based off of a short story that I wrote when I was in University about a decade ago. The two stories don’t have anything in common in terms of plot anymore (especially since the short story was Postmodern realistic fiction and HEAVILY influenced by Chuck Palahniuk), but the entire family dynamic was based on the main character, then called Jamie, who was struggling with depression and suicidal ideation, and his family, who seem to be oblivious to what’s going on with him. Sun is a pretty close equivalent to the brother in that story, whose name was Graham. Graham was the successful older brother, the one who, in Jamie’s eyes, was everything his parents ever wanted out of a kid. He was also the only one in the family who seemed to notice what was going on with Jamie. The parents in Ninelives are also very similar to the parents in that story, only the family dynamic had to do with the mom giving the dad placebos for an imagined medical issue and lying about it for years. Jamie inadvertently discovers this and has to decide between exposing this or keeping it secret. (The two stories actually start in the same place; the bathroom. Only, in the original story, Jamie was in the bathroom after a failed suicide attempt, trying to OD on the very meds that his father took, which is how he discovered the placebo thing.) I was eventually planning on turning that short story into a novella with the main theme really touching on visibility of mental illness, but between all the writing I was doing for school and some personal issues in my own life, that short story got dusty in a digital folder on a USB drive I have somewhere. Can you believe those used to be a thing? But I digress.

I have read Mind Blind, and I’m not going to pretend that it (as well as other IFs I have read) didn’t influence me to start this project. So you aren’t totally incorrect. There are similarities, but the similarities don’t come from me basing my content off of Mind Blind. Rather, prior to deciding to try my hand at writing IFs, Mind Blind reminded me so much of this short story from college that I finally decided to revisit it, albeit reshape it into something new. And, hey, that’s Structuralism, baby.

So I can definitely understand feeling these similarities at first glance. That being said, it’s also quite early in the story still, and there is a lot the MC doesn’t know, even about their own brother.

So I guess what I ultimately want to say is, give it time. I don’t personally find the characters that similar, but I also have the advantage of knowing what’s going to happen in the story. It’s definitely my goal for this story to be its own unique beast, and I hope to live up to peoples’ expectations of that. The last thing I want is to rip off of someone else’s content. >.< It’s something I always try to keep in mind when I feel inspired by other works.

I want to touch on this subject more, and I love talking about my characters, but I don’t want to ruin anything for people who want to go in blind, so I’ll talk about the rest under this cut. No spoilers, just more background information.

Ansel is actually one of the most approachable characters in the story. If you’re referring to a specific scene that occurs with a specific choice, there is a reason that he is unapproachable in that situation, and it’s something you will get to talk about with him should you trip that flag. The thing about Ansel is, there’s enough going on with him already, even after a single day, that a player might choose to be suspicious of him. And for good reason. I want to say more on that, but honestly it’s hard to talk about what’s going on with him without touching on major spoilers, so I’ll just say that Ansel is probably the easiest character to get close to (besides maybe Rene), provided you don’t let your suspicion stop you.

Sun is in a similar boat as far as the “hard to talk about without spoilers” thing. There’s something more to his overprotectiveness besides just being a loving sibling. Ulterior movies is definitely a somewhat large focus of some of this plot, and this could become a conflict with more than one character, depending on what the player chooses to pursue. Can’t say more on Sun without heading into spoiler territory either, but your relationship with him could end up really terrible for completely justified reasons later, or you can keep it pretty great, or it can be a mix of the two. I wanted that to be determinable as well as fluctuating with him because sibling relationships are rarely ever one or the other, and I didn’t want to impose that choice on players, especially not since I was already imposing a bad relationship with the parents. I hate taking away player agency when creating their character, but there are some things I just have to do to railroad the plot in the right direction. I didn’t want Sun to be one of those things.

Teagan ultimately appears a little bit tropey. I would go so far as to say there is one of him in a LOT of interactive fictions out there. Tropes aren’t necessarily a bad thing - this is how we, as a society, have formed recognizable archetypes. But that’s something I want to work on with him. My goal is to give him his own flair. Once we start seeing Teagan interact with characters like Alex, Lucia, or Rene, he should start to show his true colors a lot more. One of my major goals with this story is giving the ROs significant opportunities for personal growth, and Teagan is one of the people who needs this the most. 

As an addendum to Teagan, he actually doesn’t respond well to people being rude to him, even though sometimes it might seem that way. 🤣 Poor guy is pretty socially inept and doesn’t have a very high emotional intelligence. Ansel also doesn’t challenge him to be better, which doesn’t help. If he smiles or smirks in response to a comment or a dialogue choice, it would be safer to err on the side of caution and make zero assumptions on what it means. There are a couple of smile/smirk scenes in there that are actually considered negatives for him. I’ve been having a little fun with this, because the choices that might seem like the “right” ones to increase relationship when we’re talking about other IFs or visual novels, for example, are often not the right ones with Teagan.

The good news here is that getting to know the characters and getting close to them in Ninelives is more about just spending time with them and learning about them than it is about making “wrong” choices. I play a lot of visual novels, and one of the things I’ve always disliked about them is how often a single wrong dialogue choice (one that usually seems arbitrary at the time) locks you out of certain routes or brings you to a game-over screen. I’ve really never like that. Between that and the fact that fully-released CSGs don’t have a save feature, one of the things I decided early on was to remove anything that resembled a game-over mechanic or a complete failure to achieve something. When applying that to character relationships, that means players are going to get ample opportunities to get to know the characters without locking themselves out of friendships or romances. This doesn’t mean there are no consequences to being an asshole to the characters all the time, but consistently failing to pick the "best” reactions with characters isn’t necessarily going to ruin your chances with them either.

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Field of Poppies Part 26

Summary: After being apart for six years, childhood friends Tommy and Amelia reunite under odd circumstances. Tommy is an outspoken young man and Amelia is pregnant and out on the streets. The bond of family can be unbreakable but it is tested often. Especially when Europe descends into war.

Part 26: Everything seems to be going in the right direction but looks can be deceiving. 

          “Morning Mrs. Shelby.”

           It had become commonplace in the later months of 1918. When walking down the street, Amelia was greeted and addressed politely. Some people even went out of their way to avoid walking by her. Of course, she was just a young woman, a mother of two. There wasn’t much she could do to harm them. But it was her affiliation that brought her a level of notoriety.

           Tommy had taken the income made during the war years and turned it into a budding empire. He’d grown so much power seemingly overnight.

           People in every corner of Birmingham whispered about him and his brothers. They were afraid that if they spoke the name Shelby too loudly, they’d be struck down.

           “Mummy, who’s that?” Max asked as they were walking from Polly’s flat back to the betting shop. A gentleman had just tipped his hat and greeted Amelia.

           “I uh, I think he must work with daddy.” She answered although she wasn’t entirely sure.

           “Daddy knows everyone,” Annie said.

           Amelia laughed softly. “Well not everyone. But he knows many people. We grew up here with your aunts and uncles.”

           “Where?” Max asked curiously.

           “That flat down by the lamppost.” She pointed down the road to her childhood home. Over time it had become just part of the landscape for her. But when she moved back to Birmingham, she couldn’t help but feel the tear in her heart when she passed by its black door.  

           It was where she was born, had her birthdays, spent time with her mother and father, and felt most safe.

           The knocker on the door was still the one that had been there when she was growing up. The same one that Tommy used to get her to come out and play. Sometimes Amelia’s mother would close the door on him. So, he’d go around back and throw pebbles at her window instead.

           Amelia felt like her life was severed. What she once had and what she now had. She could argue that she was much better off with her children and husband. But there was still that yearning for the family she once had with her parents.

           She pulled herself away from the sadness and smiled. “Your father and I would play football on this street with your aunt and uncles.”

           “Did daddy love you?” Annie asked.

           Amelia smiled and squeezed her hand. “I think so, poppet. I loved him very much. Almost as much as I do now.”

~~~~~~~~~~

           Ada was clearly upset about something. When she was angry, she made it a point not to speak to anyone and made sure they knew it.

           It became very clear when she arrived home to Six Watery while Martha and Amelia were spending time chatting in the kitchen, waiting for Polly who promised to go shopping with them after she settled some work issues.

           Ada came storming into the house, slamming the door behind her. She walked through the kitchen to the betting shop doors.

           “Ada?” Amelia frowned when she saw the look of anger on the Shelby girl’s face.

           She didn’t answer and marched into the betting shop hell-bent on getting something accomplished.

           The other two women shared a glance before Amelia stood up to follow her. She wove between the men at work to follow Ada into Arthur’s office.

           There, the two eldest Shelbys were speaking with one another.

           “Why are you alienating your friends?” Ada demanded loudly.

           “Why are you coming into an office unannounced?” Tommy shot back.

           “Are you planning on cutting ties with everyone once they stop doing what you tell them?” His sister didn’t back down.

           Arthur stood up from his desk to calm things down. “Alright, alright, what’s the matter then?”

           “Freddie told me that he left the business and he said that you cut Danny out as well,” Ada explained her ire.

           Amelia, standing in the doorway, paused. This was all news to her.

           “That isn’t any of your concern.”

           “Oh, so now you’re a big-shot businessman. You don’t care about anyone.” Ada snapped sarcastically.

           “Why do you care so much, aye?” Tommy demanded.

           There was a hesitation in Ada’s face. As if there was something right on the tip of her tongue but she knew the consequences if she let the words slip. And right then and there it dawned on Amelia what those words were.

           “Because they saved your life in France. The least you could do is repay the fucking favor.” Ada spat before leaving the office, bumping into Amelia on her way out.

           Tommy and Arthur watched her leave then looked to Amelia.

           “Tom?” She asked quietly.

           He sighed and ran a hand over his face. “Freddie doesn’t want anything to do with us anymore.” He spoke evenly. “Said the communist party was a better use of his time, a better cause. Doesn’t approve of our methods anymore.”

           “What about Danny?”

           Arthur sat back down; his eyes downcast with guilt. “The war fucking got ‘im. Ain’t the same Danny he used to be.”

           “We’ve done everything we possibly can,” Tommy added.

           Amelia got a bad taste in her mouth. “Rosie relies on you to help. She doesn’t know what to do-”

           “And I do?” Tommy replied harshly.

           She swallowed and shook her head. “I guess not.” She didn’t linger much longer after that, leaving the office before she got hurt any further.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           “Ada?” Amelia knocked on the bedroom door again. “Ada, it’s just me, please let me in.”

           Only silence met her for a few moments. Then, the door opened slowly. The young woman had obviously been crying but was attempting to hide it.

           “Oh, love, I’m sorry.”

           “You shouldn’t be the one apologizing for him,” Ada muttered before going to go sit on her bed.

           Amelia walked into her room and sat beside her. On the bed, there was a heap of letters. Gently, she picked some up and flipped through them. “These are from Freddie?”

           Ada nodded. “I love him, Mel.” She admitted hoarsely. “And he loves me. But those bastards downstairs would never approve.”

           There was no use in lying to her. Amelia was well aware that any news of Ada and Freddie being together wouldn’t go over well with the rest of the household.

           “I just wish we could have what you and Tommy have. Everyone just…they just knew you’d be together. It was just something that was supposed to happen. But they’d never say that about Freddie and me.”

           Amelia wrapped an arm around her sister-in-law. “I know you’re discouraged and I understand why. But no matter what they say, I say that if you truly love him, I won’t judge you. It’s about what makes you happiest.”

           Ada sniffled and wiped her eyes. “They don’t want me to be happy.”

           “Oh, now I don’t think that’s true. They just…” She sighed. “They just think they know what’s best for you. You know they’re very headstrong.”

           “I know.”

           “And there may be a day when their opinion changes. Right now, the dust just needs to settle. They’re still trying to find their place in the world again. And that may take time.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Amelia began to notice that Tommy’s side of the bed was not being slept in. There were more nights in the week when he was absent than when he slept next to her. Though she was feeling neglected, her instinct was to worry about his health.

           Especially with Danny’s increase in outbursts and Rosie’s panic. Amelia was more and more worried that Tommy’s mind was going too.

           She decided to stay up, no matter how tired she was. The longer time passed, the more anxious she became.

           Until finally, around one in the morning, she heard the door open and shut downstairs. But she never heard Tommy’s footsteps climb the stairs. So, she decided to go down herself.

           A lamp in the sitting room was on and there was a scent of something burning. Although it was a strange unfamiliar scent to her.

           Amelia cautiously entered the room. “Tom?”

           He was sitting on the couch and placing a long pipe on the coffee table in front of him. He looked up to see his wife’s form lit up by the glow of the lamp burning in front of him. “Mel…” He slurred and began to slump down into the sofa cushions.

           “Tommy.” She crossed the room quickly to see what was wrong. She knelt by him and took his face in her hands. “What’s the matter? What are you doing?”

           “M’alright.” He assured her in a laxed tone. His eyelids were heavy. “It’s just…” He didn’t finish his sentence before he drifted off.

           Amelia was completely unsure of what to do. It was obvious that he was breathing, but she wasn’t sure if she should be afraid, he would stop breathing. Trembling slightly, she guided his hand away from the pipe and laced her fingers with his. To calm her nerves, she counted his slow breathing as he slept.

           And she sat there counting all night. Until the wee hours of the morning when Tommy began to stir and twitch in his sleep.

           Exhausted, Amelia felt his hand tighten around hers. Then suddenly, he jerked awake, sitting up in a panic.

           It jolted Amelia out of her tired daze as her hand was ripped out of his by his abrupt movement.  

           “Tommy, Tom, it’s okay.” She tried to reassure him.

           Breathing heavily, he looked around the room trying to gauge where he was and if he was safe. His eyes landed on his wife and his heart rate started to steady. “Mel…” He looked slightly past her and found his pipe and opium still out in the open, making him tense up again.

           Amelia wasn’t sure what to say. She wondered all night what she might ask when he awoke, but there were no words. Her chest tightened and everything came out all at once. “I stayed up all night with you.” She gasped out; the words had been stuck in her head for so many hours. “I didn’t know…I don’t understand.”  

           Tommy shook his head. “I don’t know how to make you understand.”

           She tried so desperately to not cry. “Have you not been sleeping?”

           He rested his elbows on his knees, leaning forward and letting his head hang. “I have if I…” He sighed. “I haven’t been sleeping upstairs because I don’t want to wake you or the kids.” He explained.

           “It’s nightmares then.” She concluded.

           Tommy put his face in his hands. “Feels worse.” He muttered into his palms.

           Amelia rested a hand on his knee. She looked to the pipe that had gone cold hours ago. The lamp near it had been snuffed out by her hours earlier. How could this be? She was jealous of a drug. Jealous of opium. Jealous that it offered her husband relief while she couldn’t.

           He lifted his head when there was a sound of a slowly plodding by the flat. “Max’s birthday is on Friday.”

           She nodded. “It is.”

           As the sun began to rise, they stayed there for a long while until the children woke. Nothing resolved, Tommy placed the pipe back into hiding and Amelia tried to forget she ever saw him slide the box underneath the sofa.

Permanent Tag: @papa-geralt-of-cirilla @biba3434 @kimmietea @karmezii @enrapturedbythemoon @vampgirl1997 @tarafaithe @evelynshelby

Tag list: @shelbyblinded @hanster1998 @xxbeckybeexx-blog @fairypitou

Masterpost

PB Masterlist

[linkfms]

☠️    *   what  is  up,  party  people  !    i’m  jojo  (  she/her  ),  23,  and  in  the  pst  timezone.    it’s  been  a  while  since  i’ve  been  in  a  group  so...  pls  bear  with  me.    anyway,  under  the  cut  you’ll  find  more  info  on  resident  emo  boy:  link  !   i’m  so  excited  to  write  with  u  all,  and,  if  u  ever  want  to  plot  give  this  a  lil’  like  or  send  an  im  over  @  yea right#4256  !

lincoln  “link”  seong  was  spotted  in  the  fashion  district  adorning  prada  combat  boots,  with  some  airpod  pros  on.    they’re  most  likely  listening  to  when  you  were  young  by  the  killers.   you  may  know  them  as  @hyperlink  or  as  that   jeon  jungkook  lookalike.    their  twenty - fourth  birthday  just  passed.    while  living  in   tribeca,   they’ve  gained  a  bit  of  a  reputation.    they’re  known  to  be  erratic  but  on  the  other  hand   vehement.    wonder  if  they’ll  be  the  next  person  to  hit  the  headlines.   (  cis male  &   he/him  )

↳     THE  BASICS:    STATISTICS.

full  name:   seong  hyunjae  (  성  현재  )    /    lincoln  seong.

nickname:  link,  and  will  probably  only  answer  to  link  !

age  &  date  of  birth:   24  &  november  21,  1996.

hometown:   born  in  busan,  south  korea,  but  moved  to  jefferson,  connecticut  in  2006.

current  location:   tribeca,  new  york.

education:  completed  high  school  and  attempted  first  semester  of  university,  but  decided  to  pursue  music  instead.

occupation:   drummer  for  indie/alternative  rock  band,  my  time  (  sound  is  similar  to  bands  like  the  killers,  the  1975,  and  paramore  ).   also  is  an  affiliate  with  an  esports  organization  !   doesn’t  play  competitively,  but  streams  and  creates  content  for  them  weekly.

sexual  orientation:   pansexual  &  panromantic.

gender  &  pronouns:   cisgender  male  &  he/him  pronouns.

↳     THE  BACKGROUND:   BIOGRAPHY.  (   tw:  mentions  of  alcoholism  &  abuse  )

seong  hyunjae  (  later  given  the  english  name  lincoln  seong...  thanks  linkin  park  !   )   was  born  in  the  heart  of  busan,  south  korea.    his  parents  married  at  the  age  of  21,  due  to  the  cultural  expectations  of  having  a  child  born  out  of  wedlock.    while  things  seemed  to  be  smooth  sailing  for  a  while,   the  couple  realized  the  real  struggles  of  adulthood.   financial  issues  came  into  play.   stress  from  working  multiple  jobs  every  single  day  took  a  toll  on  their  mental  health,  as  well  as  their  relationship  with  each  other.   link’s  mother  began  to  develop  an  alcohol  addiction,  and  her  abusive  behavior  came  following  after.   their  home  was  falling  apart,  with  four-year-old  link  falling  asleep  to  muffled  screaming  and  glass  being  thrown  on  the  next  room  over.   his  father  was  able  to  withstand  it  for  a  while,  but  he  drew  the  line  after  coming  home  from  work  to  see  large  cuts  on  the  side  of  his  son’s  thigh,  and  a  bruise  forming  across  his  cheek.   that  was  when  he  knew  his  wife  was  dangerous.    so,  one  night  when  lincoln’s  mother  as  at  work,  he  packed  his  belongings,  grabbed  link,  and  left  without  looking  back.

for  a  while,  it  was  just  the  two  of  them.    they  found  ways  to  make  it  work,  and  despite  the  fact  that  it  was  a  constant  struggle,  his  father  never  wanted  link  to  lose  his  childhood.    in  fact,  his  father  gave  him  everything  he  could  give   —   but  most  importantly,  as  cheesy  as  it  sounds,  his  unconditional  love  and  support.    as  someone  who  lost  his  own  parents  young,  he  made  sure  that  link  would  never  feel  like  he’s  being  deprived of  that,  ever.   they  created  this  tight-knight  bond  because  of  that,  which  can’t  ever  be  broken.   and  now,  link’s  fondest  memories  always  involved  spending  time  with  his  father.    one  favorite  memory  of  his  involved  morning  jam  sessions  after  breakfast.    link’s  father  was  previously  a  lead  guitarist  in  a  garage  band  with  a  few  of  his  high  school  friends,  so  while  he  was  playing  riffs  on  his  electric  guitar,  eight-year-old  link  would  be  banging  the  coffee  table  with  plastic  straws.   

when  link  was  about  ten,  he  and  his  father  sold  all  of  their  belongings  and  moved  all  the  way  to  jefferson,  connecticut  for  a  job  offer  that  he  couldn’t  refuse.   fast  forward  a  few  years,  and  he’s  a  teenager  in  high  school.    growing  up  link  was  more  of  an  introvert,  and  would  spend  his  time  in  the  computer  lab  playing  video  games  or  browsing  in  online  forums.   he  was  a  regular  in  this  my  chemical  romance  forum  (  under  the  username  @hyperlink  ),  and  made  a  lot  of  his  lifelong  friends  over  there.    one  of  his  online  friends  jokingly  suggested  one  afternoon  that  they  should  start  a  band  over  their  nightly  skype  call,  and  while  it  was  initially  shrugged  off  as  dream  more  than  an  arm’s  reach  away,  my  time  was  born.    link  had  to  endlessly  plead  his  father  to  buy  him  a  secondhand  drum  kit  off  of  craigslist  for  christmas.   but  once  he  found  it  under  their  tree  that  year,  it  sparked  this  drive  in  him  to  learn  and  practice  nonstop. 

their  first  official  band  practice  happened  a  day  after  link’s  high  school  graduation  (  which  was  also  the  first  time  everyone  saw  each  other  in  person  !   ),  and  they  spent  that  entire  summer  making  music.   at  first,  link  only  thought  of  it  as  a  hobby...  since,  he  was  attending  his  first  year  of  university  that  fall.   but  after  playing  their  first  few  shows  and  making  all  these  memories,   he  couldn’t  keep  the  band  in  the  backburner.   he  dropped  out  not  too  long  after  to  pursue  his  music  career  full-time.   moved  out,  spent  the  next  few  months  working  long  shifts  at  the  local  amusement  park,  and  shared  one  two-bedroom  apartment  with  his  bandmates.    one  of  their  songs  went  viral  one  crazy  night,   and  the  next  thing  they  knew,  they  were  being  signed  into  a  record  label.   now  ?   they’re  one  of  the  biggest  alternative/indie  rock  bands  out  there  with  multiple  platinum  records,  sold  out  world  tours,  and  millions  of streams  each  year.   their  time  finally  came.

↳     THE  INSIDE  LOOK:    PERSONALITY.

link  definitely...  gets  babied  a  lot   (  by  his  bandmates  and  his  fans  ),   and  he  uses  that  to  his  advantage  :]   because  of  that  he  gets  away  with   a  lot  of  things,  but  it’s  usually  with  things  that  are  small  like  eating  the  last  slice  of  pizza  and  it  would  be  justified  with  “  no  he  is  a  growing  BOY  he  NEEDS  it  !  ”

that  being  said,  he  eats  nonstop.   the  guy  carries  a  sandwich  bag  full  of  cheerios  wherever  he  goes.   his  friends  know  that  if  they  can’t  finish  eating  something,  they  can  always  donate  it  to  link  for  a  good  cause.

when  my  chemical  romance  announced  their  reunion  tour  in  2019,  he  threw  his  phone  across  the  room  and  cried.   my  chemical  romance  (  with  green  day  and  linkin  park  as  a  close  second  !  )   are  his  all-time  favorite  bands,  and  a  lot  of  my  time’s  sound  is  heavily  inspired  by  them.

when  i  tell  u  that  this  man  is  so  chill,  i  mean  it.   like  things  could  LITERALLY  be  on  fire  and  he’d  be  like   “  just  throw  some  water  on  it  it’ll  be  fine  😎  ” ...  he’s  not  the  type  to  worry  about  things,  and  is  more  of  a  go  with  the  flow  type  of  person.   he  doesn’t  even  need  to  be  zooted  to  be  like  this.   KJFGDG

being  in  the  band  and  a  part  of  the  entertainment  industry  caused  a  small  shift  in  his  personality.   maybe  he  just  blossomed  ?   who  knows  !   but  because  he’s  been  exposed  to  the  rockstar  life,   he  was  able  to  open  up  more.   he’s  always  seeking  thrills,  big  or  small,  and  won’t  have  the  time  to  think  about  the  consequences  for  his  actions.  

because  the  my  chemical  romance  forum  that  was  once  his  second  home  shut  down,   he’s  since  moved  on  to  reddit.   social  media  isn’t  really  his  thing  (  and  his  fans  always  get  mad  at  him  for  posting  a  selfie  once  a  month  then  dipping  ),  but  catch  him  on  subreddits  making  comments  or  starting  fights  for  the  sheer  entertainment  of  proving  someone  wrong. 

this  might  sound  bad  but...  he  still  can’t  wrap  his  head  around  the  fact  that  he  isn’t  ?   financially  struggling  anymore  ?   even  if  he’s  already  bought  a  house  and  two  luxury  cars  for  his  dad,  he  still  gets  ticked  off  if  he  sees  something  small  like  an  APPLE   that  is  marked  a  dollar  and  a  few  cents  over  the  usual.   he  catches  himself  using  things  until  they’re  ABSOLUTELY  worn  out,  and  still  leeches  off  of  his  bandmates/friends  when  he  can.  <3   also,  if  something  is  broken,  he’ll  be  the  type  to  figure  it  out  and  fix  it  himself.

people...  don’t  exactly  remember  the  last  time  he’s  slept.   it  could  be  the  insomnia   (   it’s  definitely  insomnia,  thx  childhood   trauma  !   )  but  it’s  almost  gotten  to  the  point  where  he’s  afraid  to  fall  asleep  on  his  own.   he’ll  always  try  to  find  ways  to  sleep  in  someone’s  company,  even  if  it’s  just  him  crashing  on  a  couch  while  someone  is  watching  tv  right  there.   if  he’s  alone  though,  he’ll  always  try  to  find  ways  to  distract  himself  like  stream  for  10  hours  straight.

speaking  of  trauma...  he’s  also  scared  of  relationships.  after  witnessing  the  way  his  mother  treated  his  father,  he’s  cautious  of  history  repeating  itself...  but  with  him.  so  whenever  he  catches  himself  even  falling  for  just  a  little,  he  dips.

his  life  revolves  around  the  4  m’s:   marvel  movies,  minecraft,  music,  and  my  chemical  romance.   that’s  it.

a  link  😏   to  his  pinterest  !   also,  i  don’t  have  any  wcs,  but  if  we  plot,  i  promise  i’ll  use  my  big  brain  to  brainstorm  something  with  u.  <3

[macklives]

session 92 end (bye 413...)

this session was so long but so fucking hectic what the fuck

im going to try and slim it down to its bare essentials rather than go on a full rant because im pretty sure i want to make a post later on about vriska’s characterisation (not anything about me liking her/disliking her, just an analyse on her life really, so it wont be too bias because thats not the point of an analysis. i also want to do one on aradia, been meaning to for a while... hmm... damn i havent done much analogies lately, and i THINK the last long post on a character i made was about davesprite??? so its been a fucking while. that being said, ill leave a lot of details out for this end of session notes so i dont just repeat myself later on. rather will keep to plot points here and then make character points in another)

alright

first we had a page or two where aradia confided in nepeta about her being dead which means nepeta is the only one to know this revelation. im pretty sure aradia confided because there was no other way around it, since nepeta was her server player, so it was inevitable. either way, aradia still put her trust in nep, which means, if you think about it, nobody else knows and nobody else ever will. and considering aradia asked nep to keep it a secret, it probably wont get explored by others until MAYBE later on, whenever its plot relevant, so everyone will be in the dark about it for a while which ill have to remember for future dialogue and scenes with aradia in them

then we met vriska

which, yes, is a meme. i may not have been on a lot of fandom platforms, but you cant escape some of the stuff that goes around the internet. even if you dont know undertale, im pretty sure you know of sans. or komaeda if you have/havent seen danganronpa. its just.. the memes, ya know? ive heard from many sources of the “vriska did nothing wrong” quote (even through mbmbam which??? WHAT) but since i didnt even know what it meant, i never explored it so then i never knew it was a homestuck thing. imagine my surprise...... i think even at the time, i wouldnt have known what homestuck was either honestly so it wouldnt even matter. i only recently learned about the fandom.... uhh, maybe half a year ago??? yeah, august, so my knowledge was slim but vriska is a thing ive heard before, which still shocks me

goddammit

anyways back to her

so her intro was something, we pretty much found out she likes DnD (a FANATIC in fact) and feeds her lusus the flesh of living trolls. which is fucked up. but i wont get too much into detail about that until i make a post about her life on alternia and the consequences of such. or maybe just alternia in general...?? or *both* heheheh but i feel i need more information before i go off on a tangent about that

then we met??? white text dude?? who is a major asshole but an asshole with insults that hURted, to think i felt bad for VRISKA when that happened. woah.

i said before, but... karkat, he cant really hit deep because his insults are just HIM and his way to express himself. like some people find it natural to just go “FUCK YOU” to show emphasis on a point, and thats just karkats way. he may do it so aggressively that it takes you a second to realize what he said, but usually i dont take anything to heart whenever he spurts out some insults. ive progressed to the point where whatever he says, is just “karkat” and not him trying to be actively mean. rather, its now funny whenever he does say anything SOMEWHAT creative, dude has an imagination that goes on for miles

but vriska?? she IS trying to be a bully, you can tell. but i feel theres something much more to that. like shes trying to prove herself and her “blueblooded” demeanours or whatever the hierarchy is. she doesnt want to show emotions so she makes herself a barrier by being mean is what i can gather from her conversation with kanaya. im pretty sure youre not supposed to understand her until its pointed out and rather see her as an “antagonist” at first, but yeah, her insults are more pitiful than anything and i also cant take her too seriously. i may not like her as a person but her character is interesting because you cant always have the goodie two shoes as the protags. it doesnt diversify the characterisation so i like vriska as someone who makes the plot work and it becomes more interesting since you have someone that makes it harder for the main crew to progress. a happy-go-lucky adventure with no trouble and no turnabouts would be boring in a way. so having a character like vriska, or like this new white text guy, it makes you stop for a second and realize oh shit okay, here’s where shit CAN go wrong and WHY. and i do especially like it when these bastards of characters somehow have more depth than being the “bastard characters”. kinda humanizes them in a way. doesnt mean you have to LIKE them continuously, but theyre humans (trolls whatever) in the end and every person has their own story whether its for better or for worse

for example, i like her being placed into the story, along with white text, by how its all leading to this “accident” and is slowly showing us hints on what happened, but in the end, it wont be until later that we know the full story. even if it was in the past, it apparently is very vital to the plot and shapes how the characters act in the future, so important aspects like that are to look out for. and usually they only occur when theres been some trouble within friend dynamics. so without these bastard of characters, plot wouldnt grow AS strong and i often keep that in mind when i explore a story.

anyways, I HAD A POINT TO THIS: so vriska and karkat are characters who are yes, mean, but it seems to be their personality, and the way they either show emotions and convey feelings (karkat) or make a barrier so they DONT show emotions to produce vulnerability (vriska), white text guy seems to mostly be out to be an asshole. he told vriska she was useless to sum it up but im not too sure if this is one of those “first dialogue” to mould out a bias opinion before we even get to the character themselves, but judging by how vriska and karkat played out, he surely means something bad and i dont know how to explain it. but i cannot base anything off from one piece of dialogue. i dont even know what else to call him other than white text guy so...... ill just leave that out for now, until we finally get his introduction

though, i do wish to mention, and will expand on, im not wrong when i say karkat and vriska are similar but in different context. sorry if youre favourite is karkat and you dont like vriska, or vice versa, but uhhhh their introductions are so similar its uncanny and the way they’re portrayed is the same except one is more on crack about the meddling, while the other is angry about the meddling. similar to how it was with karkat, we were introduced to vriska talking with someone we knew (tavros) whom she obviously didnt like, so obviously, from her point of view, she wanted to be menacing. like how karkat was menacing to jade because she wouldnt listen to his point... he got angry, so he lashed out. but us, the readers, didnt know that. we thought “oh god its this asshole” until we made it further in the story and started to warm up to karkat. it may not be the same with vriska, she may be a bully regardless, but you cannot tell me we moulded a bias towards her character as we did when we first read karkat. theyre both truly mean to other people, maybe both for different reasons, but i do want to point out the similarities and not leave that out. im pretty sure andrew basically gave us a conversation that formed our opinion of a character right off the bat rather than go into depth of WHY they did it, and how they are naturally without the conditions of the game. which, you can also see with vriska when she conversed with kanaya. andrew started off with a character who only appears to speak once, and makes you judge them from first appearance alone, without any explanation as to why they said what they said and how they are with other characters, let says. so you assume they were simply a rude character. now look how karkat turned out. so im guessing in homestuck, the first impression should never be the opinion you stick with until MAYBE 5 more conversations with that character (each one different)

OKAY done with the vriska introduction, now to slutquius

yes, hes kinda weird, i have stated that many times. i have no idea what to say about him other than he likes porn, he likes centaur dick which just so happens to be his lusus as well and if that isnt a red flag idk what is

he also likes his lusus milk, right from the udders of his guardian

fun times, fun times

my opinion of equius kinda.. differs. which i should really put in place the “dont judge by first impression” rule, because at first i thought he was rude with, then i thought he was hhh okay, because i understood why he was being so protective over nepeta and her team placement, since the people she was going to play with WERE dangerous. but if you think about it, both sides will probably put you in danger. it just depends on which ones you confide in more to protect your back rather than those which would cause trouble on purpose, in my HONEST opinion. so equius was a little overdramatic on that part, but i got what he meant. he was on the blue team and he didnt want to leave nepeta alone without him on the red. but then this session happened. and he went back to being weird again because of the whole porn thing, especially being so open about it like dude chill youre 13. but the thing is, then i felt bad for him because hes basically touch starved. to say that he could break anything he touches, i doubt people would go up to him for hugs. in fear they would be crushed to death by a simple hug. so im guessing hes rather lonely and doesnt really know how to interact because of this. so i felt sad that he had to live a life where he needs to be careful of everything he touches so it doesnt break randomly. see? poor dude. but then things got weird. and im pretty sure hes a masochist. so my opinion on equius is a fucking cosine graph

which brings us to the final point:

gamzee and equius’ conversation

i dont even know.....like.........gamzee was unaware that equius was using him for his own power play roleplay, right? gamzee knew it was a roleplay but it had had some.. idk.... obvious sexual implications? and i bet gamzee didnt really know that? he thought they were only venting out through a simple roleplay and trying to get closer because he originally thought equius hated him, considering equius flat out said “i hate you” and gamzee went “you tell me everyday and im okay with that” so.. gamzee probably wanted only to get closer to equius so he helped out his little problem which.. thats so sweet but i feel bad he was coerced into something he didnt get, especially since he was innocent enough to go along without knowing equius’ true gain

anyways, equius was getting off with the hierarchy thing. considering he’s “lower” than gamzee, and gamzee is surprisingly ...high on the spectrum??? so equius wanted gamzee to boss him around, because it felt only natural to him since he’s the “inferior one” and gamzee is The Big Man. like i get that, but it was written in a way that was so uncomfortable, that i wish i didnt. equius is just a weird character... hes not BAD per say, but hes... hes something alright

but im really liking gamzee. the two things which struck me in that one conversation, was the “i dont get why we should dictate people by the colour of their blood, i just see people as people” piece of dialogue and “i cant go around pleasing just everything so its alright if you hate me”

thats... so good, idk. i really liked that. i also really liked when kanaya said “youre dangerous but dangerous people are needed and are important because it shapes you” like <33 my fucking heart

god homestuck may be a tad on the weird side with some of its characters but it surely knows how to create great lines of dialogue

and that concludes the long 4 hour session i did, hope you all enjoyed it

with that, i rest

[thethousandyearwitch]

The Show Must Go On! - A Youtuber AU you didn’t want and didn’t need

Hisoka Morrow, italian Makeup Youtuber, enjoys his life in the comfort and occasional drama of his profession. But nothing brings more drama into his life than the eldest son of the Zoldyck fashion magazine empire.

Meanwhile, aspiring australian Twitch Streamer Gon Freecs forms a special bond to a Speedrunner commonly going by "Kil".

Chapter 1 

FF.net link - AO3 link 

Beep Beep. beep Beep. Click

8:00 am. Hisoka rolled over in his queen-sized bed, groaning at the interruption of his beauty sleep. Setting an early alarm after editing until 2 am was a horrible idea.

He grabbed his phone from his nightstand and rolls onto his back, following his ritual of checking all his notifications in the morning. The video he had uploaded after editing was well received, many comments about how he should try more looks with purple eyeshadow. About 3 years ago he had started his channel “Bubblegumbitch Makeup” as more of a throwaway joke after someone insulted his makeup on Instagram. However, an audience grew quite quickly, and Hisoka had to admit that he enjoyed the attention and luxury of it all. Making money by sitting in front of a camera and applying Makeup while people tell you how good looking you are is a great ego boost.

Half-heartedly he scrolled through his subscription feed, just to see what his competition was up to, though barely anyone had really uploaded during the night. Amateurs and their 'healthy' sleep schedules. A true influencer knows that an audience never sleeps.

 He disregarded his phone somewhere into the pile of pillows that make up his bed and made his way into the bathroom. His morning showers are more functional than enjoyable, quickly rinsing on whatever spirits of sleep may linger on him.

After that, the Makeup artist applied his usual morning creams, body lotion, towel dries his hair, and threw on a pair of grey low-waist sweats and a comfortable white razor-back shirt. Need. Coffee.

 Hisokas flat was a quaint little thing just outside of Rieti. An open imitation marble kitchen, facing the living room equipped with a black leather couch and wall mounted flat screen TV, opening to a relatively small balcony housing a few plants.

Exiting his bedroom, he grabbed the TV remote and switched unto a random morning news show, just needing background noise while he waits for his coffee to brew.

"And preparations are running wild for the annual Fashion Week in Rome. This year the line-up features many new promising designers from all over the globe. Tune in at 10 for more-"

The fashion week! Hisoka grinned, having nearly forgotten about this important event that he had always followed closely. Though rarely attending himself, he had been requested on multiple occasions as a make-up artist for certain models. But there was something more important connected to that special week. He grabbed his fresh cappuccino and strolled back to his room, fishing his phone from the depths of pillow mountain.

"Hisoka: Gooooood Morning! Roma's Fashion Week is coming up, are you going to stop on by? ~"

It didn’t take long before his phone chimed with the familiar Ping of a private Message.

“Bellissimo <3: I will be going to the Show for 4 days. If it proves convenient, I’d drop by for a short collaboration.”

“Hisoka: I’ll be keeping my bed warm~♥️”

“Bellissimo<3: Gross and unnecessary. I will book a room in my usual hotel in Rome. I’ll drop by for the Collaboration on Monday afternoon, and leave after.”

“Bellissimo<3: I will send you some sample pieces later, please come up with a look for one of them, and don’t just ‘wing it’ like last time.”

Hisoka giggled before disregarding his phone again. Illumi Zoldyck, breakthrough Fashion Designer from England, and eldest son of Zoldyck fashion magazine empire, who often uploaded videos of his artistic process on his channel “I. Zoldyck Fashion”. They had met 2 years ago, at a smaller Paris fashion show, the first one Hisoka ever attended. A model had requested Hisoka as her makeup artist, while Illumi had been working on a dress for her, and the two of them ended up working closely together to properly coordinate colours with each other. And though Illumi expressed great annoyance with Hisoka, they exchanged numbers, and started to make collab videos whenever they fell into the same place. Something about working together with Illumi got Hisokas heart racing. Seeing the camera-shy man get increasingly more frustrated with his antics was a joy that could hardly be topped.

But he didn’t have time to dwell in good memories and spine-tingling anticipation. He had work to do. And so once again he chucked his phone back into the pillow-cave system and made his way into his recording room.

It was a small office space, on one side an office Desk with a Desktop Computer, a couple of small succulent plants framing it, and a comfy black office chair. On the other side a set-up to record videos, with a white-pink gradient wall, a stainless white desk with a small mirror standing on it, and a less-comfy stool to sit on. In a smooth motion, Hisoka downed the rest of his coffee, set the cup aside, and started the camera. The night before he had laid out everything for his next video, a review for a new eyeshadow palette released by another Beauty Youtuber, still trying to get into the game. How Cute.

Hisoka clapped his hands together, putting on his best camera smile. “Hey, Scum! ~ Today I have a very special treat for you all. I got my hands on the new Togari Palette ‘Hunting for Your Dreams’, his first release.” He held up the shimmering silver case and opened it up for the camera to reveal 6 eyeshadows in various shades of orange and red. About half an hour and a couple try hard glamour shots later, Hisoka dropped the Palette with a grin, staring directly into the Camera. In addition to his signature Star and Teardrop under his eyes, he had attempted to imitate a flame-inspired eyeshadow look. “Well, this has been an absolute disaster. I feel like I’m losing clumps of eyeshadow every time I blink, and it feels sandy and irritating on my skin. But you have got to give it to Togari: I have never seen a Palette that features colours that are eye-biting and yet completely bland before. Though the surprise gift of a long, brown hair inside the sealed Palette wasn’t for me. But you know, if you see these Palettes in your local bargain bin, I’d say go for it.” He gave a cheeky wink, before rattling off his usual goodbyes, like and subscribe, yadda yadda.

Click.

Hisoka took the camera and set it by his computer. Before he could even think about editing, he must wipe away whatever the hell was in that shabby palette. Of course it wasn’t the worst make-up he had ever worn; it probably wouldn’t even make it in the bottom 10, he wasn’t here to make friends and spoon-feed his competition compliments. If a creator dares to churn out a subpar product, they have to deal with the consequences.

After practically subjecting himself to water torture via make-up remover towels, the man grabbed another whiteclaw from the fridge, and settled into his office chair. Digging through business emails was a boring, repetitive task, deleting promo-email after promo-email, practically begging him to promote some skin-care vitamins or boring phone app. Clicking the nails of his free hand against his desk, he tapped away at the delete button in a rhythm only known to him.

Finally reaching the bottom of his inbox, he switched to his private Inbox with a satisfied smile, an expected email already waiting for him. “From: I. Zoldyck: Roma Fashion Week Promos”.  To my private Email, dear Illumi? How shockingly Intimate~ Hisoka mocked in his head while opening the mail.  

“Hisoka.

Attached are 3 Designs I plan to show off at the show. Chose one for the collaboration and let me know in time.

Sincerely,

Illumi Zoldyck.”

Under his signature, 3 files were lined up, boringly titled “Design Roma 1/2/3”. Hisoka opened the first file and is greeted by a 2-piece suit with a light pink base colour, and blue-green flower highlights that frame the pockets and seams of the jacket, and the belt of the pants. Not bad, not bad.

The second file contained another 2-piece suit, this time with a black base colour, and a repeating roman-vase pattern in eye-catching blues, pinks, and oranges. Lovely pattern, and what a revealing jacket cut~. He was sure he had found his favourite, already planning a matching make-up look. But it wouldn’t hurt looking at the last design for pity, right?

Hisoka audibly gasped in a mixture of shock and flattery and laid a hand over his heart to complete the star performance. Staring back at him was a beautiful white-jeans design, patterned with colourful card-suits dotting the jacket and pants. The pattern was ever so slightly washed out, faking a vintage look. This is it. Mine. His heart was beating through his chest, and for the first time in a while he was truly speechless.

He had 3 more weeks until the show, but his mind was already bursting with inspiration, and when he later laid in bed, he couldn’t contain his grin as he texted.

“Hisoka: You already know which one im choosing~♥️♥️♥️”

 --------------------------------------------

Gon had been streaming for a good hour or so, talking excitedly to his chat about the new Season of Fortnite, admiring new skins that he was definitely going to try and get. Every new pass just meant a new challenge for him to prove himself, and it was undeniable that it was satisfying to work and game hard to get what he wanted. Just as he was about to ask chat if he should go another row, or change games for the night, a discord message drew his attention away.

“Kil: Yo, wanna team up? :p”

Filled with even more excitement, Gon returned his attention back to his stream. “Everyone, today we are going to feature a special guest!”

[takerfoxx]

When trying to write a big balloon of good feelings with the EXPRESS INTENTION of bursting it... how big is too big before it's just cruel?

A very good question, and it comes down to purpose, execution, and follow-through.

Now, given my history and reputation, those sorts of situations are something of my forte, and I’ve had a lot of experience and trial and error to work things out, so here’s how you get maximum impact out of your dark, cruel plot-twists.

First, ask yourself why are you doing this? Is it purely for shock value, or does it serve some greater purpose for the plot and characters? If it’s the second, then go ahead and skip to the next section. If it’s the first, then go ahead and put that idea back in the oven because it’s totally not ready yet.

Look, as a writer, I get the appeal of shock value. Shock value got Imperfect Metamorphosis on the map. Shock value is in my blood. But if all you have is that shock and nothing else, then it’s shock value for shock value’s sake, which is just shallow and useless. You want to shock and disturb, yes, but you also want your audience to keep going to find out what happens next! Dangle that emotional catharsis in front of them! Give them some measure of hope that this is leading somewhere satisfying! Even stories like Chinatown and The Mist, which ended with the protagonists losing in horrible ways despite all their efforts, still felt like they were saying something bigger about the human existence and didn’t feel like they were cheating the audience.

For example: Marisa’s death in IM. I’ll freely admit, the idea first occurred to me and became part of the plan for the shock value, a way to throw down the gauntlet and show that no one is safe. But since the idea came to me early in IM’s run, I had literal years to refine the idea, build towards it, and map out how the fallout would go down, so that by the time it came around, it had turned into an essential part of the plot, from which the rest of the story would lead.

See, here’s the thing you need to understand about dark plot twists: they follow the same rule as edgy humor that breaks societal taboo. And that is this: the twist is not the payoff; the twist is the set-up. Think of the difference of between a rookie “comedian” who thinks that saying shocking things that you’re not supposed to say constitutes as “funny” and those who are offended just don’t have a sense of humor, and a genuine master like George Carlin, who used edge subject matter and taboo breaking not as the punchline, but as the set-up to the bigger joke and thus earn the big laughs when he managed to land the punchline and say something bigger about the topic at hand. It’s a wire act without a net, something that is spectacular if you can pull it off and lead to something greater, but will end in disaster if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Now, let’s move onto the next part: execution. Here you have to be careful, because while it’s perfectly acceptable (and in fact encouraged) to break the rules and conventions of the story’s genre, you still have to ensure that it’s keeping with your story’s internal consistency and rules, and that it makes sense! You want such-and-such a character to betray their friends and turn bad guy? Okay, but it has to make sense and be consistent with their backstory and motivations. You want to pull the rug out from under the heroes and ruin everything they had been working toward? Okay, but it has to be consistent with the rules that you had set up.

I’ll give you a few examples. Now, Game of Thrones might be in the doghouse due the dumpsterfire of a final season, but there was a time when it was upheld as the gold standard of dark plot twists, with the two big examples being Ned Stark’s execution and the Red Wedding. The reason why those moments were so shocking and effective wasn’t because they came out of nowhere, but because they broke the conventional rules of storytelling. OF COURSE the main character would survive! They even gave him an out by having him sentence to the Wall where his bastard son was, where they would no doubt reunite and plan their next steps! Ned’s the hero, after all! Except no, this isn’t that kind of story, Joffrey is still a sociopathic narcissist, doing what sociopathic narcissists do.

And the Red Wedding? OF COURSE it would work! Walder Frey had accepted the compromise, and we’ve put a lot of time and investment in Rob and Cate and their retainers. Rob was practically the new main character, and the driving force against the Lannisters. What was more, he was winning, and he was going to keep winning, even with his one or two slip-ups...except no, he wasn’t, because he had been warned about Walder Frey’s easily bruised ego, he had broken his word, so there was going to be consequences when the Frey’s cut a deal with the Lannisters, so welcome to Medieval-style skullduggery!

Hell, you can have some real fun with this too! And if I may toot my own horn, let’s look at the most recent dark twist from IM: the return of the Shadow Youkai.

Now, I know what my reputation is, and what people expect from me. As such, I can use those expectations to play a sort of follow-the-cup game with the plot. Everyone knew that the Shadow Youkai wasn’t gone for good; the epilogue of Fires of the Sun pretty much showed that. But no one knew when she’d be back, and that let’s me play with expectations a bit.

So I put together a big beach trip, where Rin takes all of her friends, new and old, out into public. And since this is Rin’s story, everyone expects it to go wrong. She expects it to go wrong. Because things always go wrong for Rin!

Sure enough, here comes Hong Meiling and Koakuma, two people with reasons to ruin Rin’s life! Surely they’ll catch and bust her! In fact, it turns out that Koakuma is Elis’s cousin, so surely that would mean she would...except no, they have a short chat, Koakuma doesn’t expose them, and they all go their separate ways. Nothing happens.

Oh shit, here comes Reimu! Not only does she know Rin, she also knows everyone in Team Nineball, and has fought most of the other girls as well! This isn’t good, how will Rin wriggle out of this (no pun intended)...except she doesn’t need to. Reimu and Rin’s various friends walk right past each other over and over without noticing, she chitchats with Hong Meiling and Koakuma for a bit, and then she’s called away to the next chapter’s plot. Rin never even so much as realizes that Reimu was there. Nothing happens.

But wait! Flandre is still a problem, and Seija’s still loose out there! And there she is, taking advantage of Rin’s absence to trigger Flandre’s madness! Surely THIS is the big disaster that’ll...except no, Kogasa quickly gets Seija to piss off and Wriggle coaxes Flandre back to sleep. Nothing happens.

Wait, the beach party was...a success? Nothing bad happened? Everyone had fun and made friends like they were supposed to? And it ends with Rin actually saving a stranger’s life and getting praised for it? Which story was I reading again?

Oh hey, there’s Minoriko, someone who hasn’t been seen a long time, and she says that Hina successfully devoured the Shadow Youkai’s essence, so there’s nothing to worry about. Well, that’s a relief! Strange though that a little curse goddess could handle something of the Shadow Youkai’s caliber, seeing how Sariel already mentioned how unsafe it is to use anything other than the original sword to do so, and how Rhapsody of Subconscious Desire already established that the Shadow Youkai is capable of taking over a secondary host, provided that she had access to their subconscious, and-

Click.

Boom.

So if you’re going to do it, make sure you set up believable reasons why it would happen in advance, even if the audience doesn’t notice them at first. Otherwise, you get Vince Russo’s booking of late-90′s WCW, where everyone was switching allegiances on a dime left and right just for the sake of having a SHOCKING SWERVE! Remember: it’s a highwire act without a net. Know what you’re doing.

Also, for the love of God, if you’re going to have a bad guy do a really bad, shocking thing in one part of the story but later join the good guys later on, don’t just sweep said bad thing under the rug. If Cain the Bloodspiller butchers little Timmy in book one but becomes Cammy the Bloodsaver in book five, then don’t let little Timmy be forgotten. Make sure that there’s still consequences.

And finally, the follow-through. Justify this shocking twist. Have it mean something. Take your time to explore the consequences. Show how it affects the characters. Dig deep into their psyches and make it feel real. The reason people STILL talk about Aeris’s death in Final Fantasy 7 is that the gameplay itself was designed to make you feel her loss, both from the viewpoint of the characters and you, the player.

One of my favorite dark twists is Mami’s death in PMMM, because it follows all of these conditions and does so spectacularly. It sets up how dangerous fighting witches is and explains that someone could really die while doing it, while tricking us into not expecting that to happen by already showing us how Mami kicks ass and establishing her as a main character with a promise to form a lasting bond with Madoka right before pulling the trigger. And afterward, it takes the time to really dig into the consequences of her death, from Madoka’s depression to Sayaka’s increased recklessness to being the catalyst that brought Kyoko into the story in the first place. Everything that happens after does so as a result of that moment.

So yeah, by all means, do that shocking thing, but make sure you put in the work to both earn and justify it.

[howdoyoudothedew]

Another long SPN post

This time it’s notes from my WIPs. I never actually really wrote any of these, but tags and titles are included. Anyone can use these as starting points for a fanfic, have fun

Henry/Balthazar Summary: When Henry’s mentor, Benny, doesn’t return from the war Henry is saddened. He refuses to believe Benny died. Won’t even entertain it. On the way to find his missing mentor/father figure, he meets Balthazar. A strange man with a british accent and a habit of flirting with everyone, especially him. He finds Benny. He finds love. THen Balthazar tells him he’s from another time period and has to go. The last chapter is Balthazar saving Henry from Abaddon. Side note: Henry has blue eyes that Balthy apparently likes to wax poetic about Chapter One The day’s circled on his calendar. ‘Benny comes home’. That would be today. Or, it would’ve been. He had gotten the letter a week ago. ‘Benjamin Lafitte died in the war. We send our condolences.’ The letter, of course, wasn’t actually as cold and unfeeling as that. But it didn’t matter. Because it felt like that. It felt like someone had taken him and shoved him in an ice bath. He couldn’t believe the letter. He wouldn’t believe the letter. Benny had promised he’d live through this war. And if he had to find him, then by golly he’d find him. Even if he had to do it on his own. Henry snuck out of the bunker that night. A pack of food was the only thing he brought with him. That, and a picture of him and Benny. No one caught him on the way out. He knew the passages too well. He stole a bike from the garage, and left. There would be no note left in his absence. No trace of where he’d gone. Because if he’d left one, he worried that they’d try to find him. Find him and drag him back. But he couldn’t go back. Not now. Not without Benny. New section He’d been on the hunt for four days now. Had traveled from Lebanon, Kansas to Chattanooga, Tennessee and was slowly making his way to the Georgia coastline. His plan was to check coastal cities first. Then he’d work inwards till he covered all of the US. He only hoped Benny would return here and not go to another country. This is where he runs into Balthazar It’s when he’s asking a bartender if he’d ever seen Benny, while showing his picture Balthy comes up to him and says “Are you from around here, because you’re a perfect ten.”

----

Don't Make Bets With Love Goddesses Five chapters Alternative meeting, canon divergent, Gabriel is Loki, Aphro has her son arrow multiple people, but Gabe bypasses them all “You cheated!” “That never seemed to matter to you before, now how did I cheat?” “Eros shot Sam with an arrow!” “My son’s arrow never touched the Winchester.” Everyone has what the humans would call a ‘soulmate’, not everyone finds them and they're not always romantic. It looks like Gabe found his, though.

Chapter One Explains how Loki has messed around, yet has never fallen in love “I will never fall in love” the Norse god boasted. He was talking out of his ass, and Aphrodite knew it. Loki bets Aphrodite that he will never fall in love She accepts with a wicked twinkle in her eye Aphro has never been able to pass up bets, especially when they deal with love He was close once, with Kali, but it ultimately fell flat It didn’t even actually fall flat with Gabe, but with Kali who could sense his growing attachment and cut off their involvement before it could happen. They had made a promise to each other that their thing would remain ‘no strings attached’. Then years where nothing happens

Chapter Two Sam enters the scene He’s tall and handsome; funny, sarcastic, witty. And he’s one of the only people Gabe has ever met that won’t take his crap. That will see right through it. Gabriel vows right then and there that he won’t fall in love with Sam.

----

Different Circumstances Summary: Where the first meeting isn't of a boy with demon blood and an archangel, hidden as a trickster god, disguised as a janitor. Nor is the second meeting, or the third, or even the fifth. Until suddenly it is and the world seems just that much more messed up. Six chapters Tags: Canon divergent, Canon universe, 5 + 1 format, fluff, angst

Chapter One High school Gabe is the ‘bad kid’ They bond over pranks, and Gabe teaches Sam a few tricks

Chapter Six Sam connects all the dots and realizes the few people he had met in his life, the ones other than Jess that he had clicked with on automatic, were all the same person. Where all the trickster, Loki the god of mischief, and Gabriel the messenger of God. He hadn’t even clicked with Jess as quickly as he had seemed to click with each and every version of Gabe he had met. And now he was gone.

----

To Heal A Soul Summary: Castiel isn't the only angel who tried to save Sam Winchester from the Cage. But while Castiel got a body, the other found only a soul. Tiny and broken, frayed at the edges, yet still somehow alive curled up in the corner of the Cage. Gabe keeps and heals Sam’s soul until he feels that it could be replaced with minimum consequences, when he does replace it there is still a battle. Gabe can’t help him with this battle, none of Team Free Will can. Gabe's dog is Max Chapter One Gabe gets Sam’s soul, just his soul, from the Cage because he knows what’ll happen if he puts his soul back in his body after Lucifer had ripped it out Sam gets a different… form type thing. Like, I don’t know Gabe uses pagan magic to give Sam a body like his own Explains to Sam the situation

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Stacy’s Dad (Lafittz) Tags: help me for i know not what im doing, i love this song and had to do this though, babysitter!garth, single father!benny, female teen oc, benny is older than garth by a few years, dilf!Benny, Notes: I'm sorry for the dilf tag, but I thought of it and it was too funny to me to not include it. Garth’s turned twenty a day ago, and is babysitting Benny’s kid (she’s twelve, so it’s not exactly babysitting) Benny’s thirty (his wife and him had Stacy when they were eighteen, they married right out of high school) Garth asks Benny out, saying that he promised him when he was eleven he’d go out with him when he turned twenty Stacy and Garth go to the pool, where Benny may work as a lifeguard Or, Stacy met Garth during her freshman year and they hit it off immediately as friends But Stacy liked Garth, and when he met Stacy’s dad it was practically love at first sight. (Because he's mushy like that) Or Benny and Andrea had her at sixteen, and Benny was estatic. Sure, it was early and he wasn't sure if he was ready, but he'd be damned if he didn't try to be a good father.

----

Scarecrow Summary: Remake where Cas is a “hunter” who Dean picks up on the way to ----, he's working the same case and they decide to pretend to be a couple to solve it. Also, instead of Meg, Sam runs into Gabriel because he picks him up on the road before he got to Meg. Sam’s part is inspired in part by the honeythief amv. Tags: s01e11 Scarecrow, rewrite, i tried, canon divergent, canon hopping, beginning unchanged, fake/pretend relationship, bonding(????) Dean picks up Cas either along the road (a parallel of their brothers) or at the food place he and Sammy split A man slid into the seat Sam had vacated, black hair Dean could only describe as bedroom hair, piercing blue eyes, and a trenchcoat. “So you're going after the missing couples, too?” The other couple isn't there, instead the people there immediately assume they're a couple Cas immediately goes with it and when Dean asks about it later he simply shrugs and explains that this job seemed to require some falsehood

---- Short ficlet where they find Narnia. “I thought you'd already been to Narnia given how deep inside the closet you are,” Gabriel joked.

----

Sabriel Anniversary Sam: Gabriel, I figured we could go where I first fell in love with you. Gabriel: Sam, I'd rather not… Sam: Why not? Gabriel: I have bad memories there. Sam, in surprise: Bad memories? I mean , sure we tried to kill you Gabriel: Lucifer killed me. Sam: Oh… Oh! You were thinking Elysian Fields? I meant Crawford Hall! Gabriel: What? Sam nervously rubs the back of his neck while looking away: Yeah… Could never really get you out of my head after that. *looks back at him* Even when I really wanted to. ----

Everytime they find Gabriel again, Sam wants to ask Gabriel to help. He wants him to stay. Though he tells himself it's not for him, but the world. But then they leave him behind in that ring of holy fire. And he… dies. At the hands of Lucifer. Sam thinks that's it. But then he shows up again, only to save him and leave him. (But it wasn't just him- it was Castiel as well, he has to remind himself for the next few weeks till it sticks.) So this time Sam swallows everything down, and he tells himself it's okay. Gabriel would've never stayed. And that's fine. Then Gabriel's back again, and he finally agrees to be on their team. He finally agrees to simply stay, even if it isn't for him. So of course he has to die all over again. ----

A rebound. Gabriel knows that's exactly what this is. After knowing Sam for all these years, he can read him. Read him easier than he can read himself. Heck, he knew Jess and Sam’d date the second he saw them together. And just as he knew, a month later they were dating. So yeah, Gabriel knew how to read Sam and how he felt about others. Romantic feelings just weren't there for him. Sure, Sam sounded sincere. He truly believed he liked Gabriel, and Gabriel knew that. But he knew his best friend and he knew the feelings were just his body’s half-assed attempt at fixing whatever hole Jess had left him with that he refused to recognize.

“I'm not ready.” It's not a lie. Gabriel isn't ready to date anyone, even if he loves Sam with all his heart. But he refused to be a rebound. He told the girlfriend Sam has before Jess- Ruby- as much when she gave him her twisted blessing after Sam broke up with her. If Sam knew that's what he was looking for in Gabriel, it would crush him. The poor kid would feel terrible, and Gabriel knows it. That is something he won't allow. Sam deserved happiness, but it couldn't be with him. Not now. Maybe not ever.

---- Crime Cleaners crime scene cleaners sam and dean who get roped into something well above their paygrade by two particular Novaks, possible villain being Luci and Lilith, who is his 'queen' they definitely get help from their friend Bobby and the Novak's friends Charlie, Rowena, and Rowena's girlfriend, the coroner Billie Or, serial killers God and his Righteous Man, who are secretly Dean and Cas. Gabe and Sam are the ones trying to find them.

----

John Winchester and Chuck Shurley meet the parents thing. John first meets Cas, and Dean explains that Cas is his husband. Then he meets Gabriel, Sam’s bondmate-husband- and an archangel. When he mentions how weird this is, Gabriel is the one who points out that “If you think it's weird that your son in laws are angels, just remember that their father in law is literally God.”

----

Normal au, Gabriel shows up out of nowhere because he has to do a blood sugar test to check for diabetes or some shit and he just grabs Sam: “I need your blood.”

[tacittherapist]

((HS2 Spoilers under the cut!))

((For all the shit I give the epilogues, it does have its moments. Specifically highlighting this bit of dialogue here: ROXY: you think you choice mattered so much that no one elses could measure up? ROXY: n then what ROXY: did u get what u wanted? ROXY: did your life end and the points got tallied and you came out on top or like what? ROXY: still p much seems like were movin to me ROXY: and you sure dont seem like ur winnin so wheres all this good shit you got that you gotta go around handin out apologies for? ROXY: also damn dude while were at it!! ROXY: u forgot to actually say sorry in that apology! JOHN: no, i didn’t — i just meant... JOHN: i’m sorry for fucking up your life, or making it not— ROXY: i like my life!!! ROXY: i mean it aint perf and i got my share of fuckups n mistakes in there but you dont get to tell me its fucked up ROXY: or that it isnt real or somethin ROXY: its mine!

First: criticism. The writers wield this little section like a crude cudgel. They use it to underscore the weight of ‘canon’. This is the ‘candy’ timeline, so it supposedly ‘weighs less’ than the ‘meat’ timeline, but its characters still have meaningful thoughts and emotions. Here, John supposedly makes a choice that supposedly invalidates a bunch of supposedly important events, and Roxy here blows it all out of the water by claiming she made these choices too and that part of the blame rests with her in the direction her life has taken... which is total dogshit used to justify a bunch of really overt swings in character thematic. Continued here: ROXY: you wished i was one way the whole time we were married ROXY: but i wasnt ROXY: but now that youre all convinced ur the only real boy in a crowd o puppets ROXY: here i am bein me just like you ordered only i did it without your help ROXY: widen ur zoom my man!! ROXY: im not actin like this now because you want me to or bc you dont want me to ROXY: i was bad at standin up for myself then and im learnin to be good at it now ROXY: ive got my own self actualization train ROXY: ur just pullin in to one of my many roxy figures some shit out stations right as i built it JOHN: but... JOHN: you were never like that before i... ROXY: dude ROXY: where tf do u get off trying to decide what is or isnt me being “like me” enuff ROXY: do u think ppl stay the same their whole damn lives or what JOHN: you’ve really never felt like anything about our lives here was... off? ROXY: off from what exactly?? JOHN: the way things should be? ROXY: what does that mean???

Roxy here argues that there is no ‘one right way to be’ as a half-baked wink to the audience that all this gross mischaracterization is intentional and that it diverges so grossly from the established character arcs in order to demonstrate that nothing is set in stone. While technically true, this also makes for some pretty terrible writing.

Roxy was a caring, almost too involved individual before the epilogues. Her ditching Calliope for John and this messy marriage business and just letting Jane warp into a full-blown dictator makes no sense, even couched within the idea that ‘characters change.’ Yes, characters change, but there’s generally a reason for it! And not a shitty deus ex machina reason such as ‘John makes a choice!’ What even fucking happened to Candy Calliope anyway? She just fucked off somewhere? How do you sincerely throw a character away like that and then have the gall to wink at the audience as if what you’ve done makes sense? Changes in character are generally brought on by catalysts in their life! Trauma, joy, death, new settings, new ideas, events! Not... John deciding to eat a plate full of candy. If we had insight into Roxy’s thought process behind ditching Calliope and marrying John and having a kid on a whim, this might be saved. But we don’t even get a glimpse. Instead we’re pawned this shitty excuse for a very glaring departure from what we knew about Roxy. Character development is just that -- development! As in to become more complex or advanced! Roxy has made wrong choices in the past, yes, but her reasoning was laid bare in such a way that those wrong choices made sense for her to make. She then makes different decisions later because she learned from her wrong decisions. This is development! Her character is learning and changing behavior because of the things they’ve been through! Her reasoning for this awful series of bad choices is just... not explained, despite going against a ton of shit Roxy has learned. It’s slipshod. It’s careless. It’s sacrificing the tree to showcase the topper. The audience isn’t vested in this Roxy because she’s seemingly robbed of her agency, and then they’re trying to foist this idea that she somehow still has agency on us as if they didn’t preface the entire timeline with ‘well, all this shit is going to happen because we decided it and no other reason!’

Now: the praise. This bit of dialogue has huge implications for ‘non-canon’ dynamic. No, not ‘non-canon’ in the cheeky way the epilogues and HS2 claim to be ‘non-canon.’ I mean ‘non-canon’ as in this blog that I run and all the blogs that you, the reader, are writing and reading as well. Roxy’s insistence that characters change can swing the other way, too. Characters can develop in bad ways as well! Not bad as in bad writing, but bad as in flawed character reasoning! Suppose what Roxy learned from her time in HS1 was that most things can be solved by unvoiding fix-all solutions into existence? Then we might be able to see her trying to fix the human-troll-population issue by just... making more planets! Or unvoiding some sort of device trolls could wear that inhibits hivemind tendencies! That would be interesting and perhaps morbid to write about!! It would at least track with her past experiences!!! Or better yet: perhaps she actually takes a side against Jane (as she has done in the past) but instead of using their friendship as the moral plating, she went right into sarcastic arguments FOR eugenics to demonstrate how bigoted Jane was being? That’s a very Roxy thing to do!! She could have made the argument that if trolls need eugenics to suppress their violent tendencies, then so should humans! Having read about the Condesce’s eugenic practices during her formative years, this should have been fairly obvious to Roxy that what Jane was suggesting was from the same playbook, at least.

But I digress. What this bit of dialogue really does is give credence to us, the audience, in exploring these stories we’re currently writing for these pre-established characters. YES, canon Rose likely didn’t dabble so thoroughly in game magics, and she likely didn’t have as much anxiety as my Rose. BUT I prefaced my Rose’s current state with a bunch of events that make sense! She missed her rendezvous with the others! She had to float adrift, alone in a broadcast satellite, for nigh on a decade! She’s had a long fucking time to develop all these anxieties and mental illness because that’s what happens when you’re isolated for years! It is a tool I use to express my own anxieties and explore how someone might somehow overcome them! And most importantly: she’s still Rose. She has unprocessed mother issues. She cherishes her friends. She’s more than a bit gay. And she knows when the meta is using her and when it’s not, because she’s had a traumatic experience being used by Doc Scratch as a plot device. And that trauma isn’t going away (well, unless she gets therapy, but given the setting we’re writing... not likely), so she’s going to be overly cautious when it comes to big decisions involving her friends. What she’s not going to do is suddenly abandon everyone she’s departed from because uhhh Jade ate some bread the wrong way or whatever.

tl;dr: What this section of the epilogues/HS2 (well, really just this bit with Harry Andersen, Tavros, and Vrissy that is somehow more interesting than virtually EVERY OTHER PART of HS2) is telling us, the audience, is that it is good to diverge from canon. Non-canon characters will still have very real feelings and face very real consequences for their actions. Just... don’t do it like they did it. All these characters we’re writing for and all these events we’re writing around them... they’re valid! They matter! Just because they’re not canon doesn’t mean others are willing and wanting to read them, and that makes them important! Unfortunately, this also means the epilogues/HS2 are important, but let’s ignore that for now. What I’m trying to say is: be indulgent! Write the things you want to write! As long as they’re well-reasoned, they’re good writing! Characters can be overpowered! They can be cliche! They can have teenage problems as an adult! Just... give them a good reason.))